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[size=15]Showdown Promo #1[/size]


[size=15]@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:[/size]



[size=15]“Well here we are, just days away from me getting my long overdue shot at the EAW National Elite Championship. I cannot express with words just how long I ha r been yearning, coveting, and desperately grinding away for this opportunity. For over a year and a half I was haunted by a win.  That’s right, POP, Stark, Rex, and every other paper champion to hold that belt have denied me what was rightfully mine!  They were too afraid to step into the rig with Mark Michaels because they knew I’d outclass ‘em at every turn. They knew that if given the chance I’d step on their throats and tear that title out of their cold dead hands if need be. So each and every single one of them since January 1st, 2016, has dipped, dived, and ducked me in order to hang on to my belt for just a moment longer. This has been the modus operandi and it has driven me insane, it has burned a hole in the bottom of my stomach.  I’ve nearly went sick chasing after this belt for he better part of the past two years, and all the while I’ve dealt with doubting critic who sit behind a keyboard and type up scathing, hyperbolic, defamation of my talents.  These trolls have never once stepped foot into a ring, and more so they never will so long as I’ll be waiting to show each and every one of them just how good I am between the ropes. Oh And let us not forget how I’ve had to contend with a sea of envy they call the locker room, the guys like Kaise Boetius, and all his curtain jerking ilk that go out of their way to hinder me, while they ride my coattails.  The ones who just as soon as I seem to get a breath of fresh air, try to drag me back down to their scum on bottom of the barrel level. They screw me out of title shots, they go out of their way to try and end my career, Finnegan Wakefield Your beloved New Breed Champion, he was nothing more than a Michael’s envy suffer hater who tried to break my neck by suplexing me on the concrete floor right before the ref could count three in a number one contender’s match!  You’re precious little Nico Borg, the guy who Everton is wondering when he’s gonna use up his cash in the vault, he’s never beaten me. The Riddler hit me below the belt with a cane, something that would have put a normal man out of commission, but I persevere to make it to the end of a Hell’s Warpath Match, and the only thing everyone wants to talk about is Lucas coming in at the very end and finally getting his big win.  Each and every one of these knuckleheaded nimrods in the back burn with jealousy the moment I step out on the stage. They can’t stand that I’m more talented, more charismatic, and better looking than every one of them combined!  And for my troubles, for my efforts, for all the mountains and molehills I’ve been made to climb just the chance  to get out of this lower midcard hell![/size]


[size=15]Well come this Saturday night, it’s all gonna change. Because finally, I’ve gotten my rightful shot at the National Elite Championship!  Mark your calendars ladies and gentlemen, because this will be a day to remember, Mark Michaels capturing his first title here in EAW, and forever altering the landscape of both this company and this industry, it’s gonna happen because this time the title is in the line, this time the doofus holding it can’t run away, and this time it’s gonna be me standing with my hand raised high and the confetti raining down in grand celebration of my well deserved victory. [/size]



[size=15]Now I know that all the naysayers out their are just waiting for me to finish up this post so they could start talking all that hot garbage that pours out of their mouths, I know the rookies Lance Hart and James Ranger (you’re both so bland, dull, and interchangeable I might as well save the time and address both of you here.) can barely wait to run their mouths about how their the future because they barely eked out a win against some nobody in the minor league. But those two better start realizing real quick that the only future they’re ever gonna see, is me holding the title they wish they could get their hands on, me having my face on all the billboards and banners and promotional cups they give out at Burger King.  In short they only thing that these boys are ever gonna do, is chase after the man who is the undisputed and unquestioned leader of the entire EAW roster regardless of brand. Now sure you boys had a few flashes of brilliance here and there, but those few sparks are nothing compared to the towering inferno that i am.  You guys are diamonds in the rough, I’m the most prized stone the world has ever laid eyes on, adored for its beauty as much as its value, nothing could ever compare.  That’s the level of disparity that’s between us. You boys would have been looked on as possible contenders, as guys who could have walked out with the win, but that’s simply not the case when you are locked inside that Elimination Chamber you boys are gonna find out real quick that even the two of you combined can’t beat perfection!  You two are about to go right out of the frying pan, and into the fire. And when I’m done with both of you, you’ll be left absolutely torched in that ring #iPromise [/size]


[size=15]Now with the newbies out of the way, let me address the real meat of the competition. Let me address the three stumbling, stammering, head stuck in the sand haters who for one reason or another can’t seem to get it threw their thick skulls that come hell or high water, rain or shine, that title is being strapped around my waist.  [/size]

[size=15]That’s right Nobi, this weekend is gonna turn out for you like every other time your choke artist ass steps on up to the plate. One more time with the bases loaded and count full, you’re gonna gather all your might, give a mighty swing, and be called on strike three.  Now I’m more than sure you had your hands full in that little six man, but keep this in mind, I don’t have to carry any deadweight tag partners in this one.  You get to experience a Mark Michaels with no limitations, no restrictions, one who doesn’t have to play nice to win. Like I said just a week ago, if I want to hurt you, if I want to bash your face into those steel chains, or send you crashing thru that bullet proof glass when we’re inside the chamber, there isn’t a damn thing that anybody could do about it. Your fists can’t help you in this situation, your (inferior) skills on the mat won’t mean a damn thing. When that bell rings and we’re in that ring together, anything and everything is fair game.  A Selfie stick to the jaw is as legal as a headlock here. And that plays right into my hand, because not only do you not have enough manhood to throw down and draw blood from each and every opponent in your way, your dealing with a man who will in a heartbeat. So what’s the game plan here Nobi?  What are you gonna do against the guy who’s been thru glass Gauntlets, and hell’s Warpath, and flaming rope and table battle royals, and walked away without a scratch?!  How can you break @EAW’s ironman?!  Plain and simple, you can’t!  So if I were you, I’d be hoping and praying that you get eliminated long before Mark Michaels enters the match. Because when the Picture Perfect savior of showdown is in that ring, There won’t be a man alive that can stop him from cutting thru everyone between himself and that belt. #cantstop #wontstop[/size]




[size=15]And that includes you Lucas. Seems like old times, me poised to win a championship and cement my legacy here in EAW, and you shouting your fat head off about how you were the lucky fluke to ever steal a win. Now before you go spinning tall tales about how you were a dominant champion who everyone feared and such, let me remind you that while that might work on the lower I.Q.s in this match (yourself included) it never has and never will work[/size]
[size=15]On me. See I’m the guy who called you out for winning the New Breed Championship by entering last into a match where I did all the work. And I was also the guy who called you out for beating chumps who never did anything worth challenging you for said title. And when we you finally stopped ducking me, what did you do? You threw in a low level chump who wasn’t worthy of challenging for the title so that you’d have someone to pin.  Now since that triple threat match, we’ve crossed paths a time or two. And just like I always said, you were never better than perfection. I outlasted you in the ring of fire battle royal, and I outlasted you in the flaming table five way. So maybe before you drone on and on spouting those lies you Love to tell yourself, maybe take a moment to pick your words because Saturday night I’m gonna shove them down your throat. I’m gonna definitely, and completely best you in every imaginable way my friend. It’s my time now, my golden moment, my triumphant victory that will live forever in the lore of Elite Answers Wrestling. So as I said, pick your words carefully, because when I dominate you, and pin you 1,2,3, in the middle of The ring, you won’t have any excuses, you won’t have any way to deny that everything I’ve always said about you is true, and you won’t have anybody to blame but yourself. [/size]




[size=15]And that just leaves you, our reigning, defending National Elite Champion. You know POPS, it’s really fitting how this season is coming full circle in a way. I beat you 1,2,3, you get lucky because some moron with a crush on me sent me thru a table before I could eliminate you from the five way at Dia Del Diablo, and now here in the chamber, I’m gonna pin you again. I’m bringing an end to your little nostalgia run, and in doing so I’m gonna take possession of my National Elite Championship. And when I do please don’t go around doing the pouty hall of famer thing. You know where you discredit your legacy by whining and moaning and crying like five year old girl. When I beat you (and rest assured I will be beating you) don’t try to find a scapegoat, don’t go on a rant about how Bryan Daniels made you defend this belt against me because when you won the damn thing Stark was as too high to realize the bell rang!  Let me tell you something, this is a long time coming to me, I’ve been denied my greatness far too many times. I have been shoved aside by champions who were too afraid to face me, and general Managers who were too incompetent to realize what they had on their hands!  It’s been a long, long time waiting for this chance, it’s been what feels like forever for me to capture this title, and I will not waste this chance!  This time that belt goes thru me, this time inside of over a ton of steel There is no where for anyone to run. This time that title is mine and if I have to send you back to the retirement home, or the hospital, or the mortuary, well than by all[/size]
[size=15]Means I will.  #nowayout[/size]




[size=15]So get ready, because the crowning moment of the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero is coming this Saturday night!  Blood, sweat, and every drop of energy I’ve spent getting to this match, it’ll have been well worth it when I hold that gold. Get ready because to beat me you’re gonna have to kill me and than kill my picture perfect zombie when it comes looking for that belt (#arrgBelt!). [/size]

[size=15]This Saturday, you will be in the ring with hands down, absolute, head and shoulders above the rest, single greatest professional athlete to ever lace up a pair of boots and step into a ring!  You will see why I’ve amassed an army of followers across the globe who hang on every word, fawn over every picture, and celebrate like it’s a holiday when I get a win. You will find out why I’m the undisputed Social Media Champion, and perfection incarnate in that ring, so all you boys better start getting to Picturing THAT![/size]

[size=15]#NextNEChamp #EliminationChamber #Showdown #EAW”[/size]



[size=15]55,000,000 users liked this. [/size]

[size=15]Showdown Promo #2[/size]



[size=15]@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:[/size]


[size=15]“You know something followers, it seems that every single time I try to clue some of the lower I.Q’s in the common locker room as to how they're all beneath me in the pecking order here in EAW, those same empty headed knuckle draggers tend to shoot their mouths off and make even bigger asses out of themselves. Case in point being Nobi, and Prince Of Phenomenal. Two of the most overrated acts that managed to net themselves contracts with company. I’m sure by now everyone has had a chance to hear these neanderthals grunt out something that would sound like an argument to anyone  in their special needs class. But with every word that spills out of their mouths, it is just dripping with tension and passive aggression towards their teammates.  Oh yeah, see while Nobi and POP (and I'm sure Ranger will be joining them soon) are busy trying their best to make it sound like there is any cohesion between them, we all see right thru it and know that their trying to one up each other in their own little pissing contest. Hell Nobi practically admitted as much the last time he opened his mouth and wasted five minutes of time that we’ll never get back. [/size]


[size=15]Instead of doing the smart thing (well the other smart thing, because both of them still haven't just dropped out of the National Elite Championship match.) they yammer on and on, every syllable another wedge driven between them. Meanwhile my teammates have more or less elected me captain of our team and as such they have given me every right and privilege to speak on their behalf in regards to this six man tag team contest. They allow the true star of he show to shine, because they know that not only am I the most charismatic man on the mic (or keyboard in this case), not only am I the best between those ropes, they know that by allowing me all of this precious screen time I can get their point across better than they can, I can keep us solid as a unit, and I can personally assure them a victory this week. Unlike how I can only assure them getting an ass kicking the next.  [/size]


[size=15]Now I certainly realize some of you doubt the validity of my claims. Some of you are wondering just how in the world I could possibly claim that I'm gonna carry Lucas Johnson and Lance Hart to a victory. And granted it won't be easy with these two. But I can stand here confidently and proclaim Victory for team Michaels, because while every one can speculate about who has the edge physically, mentally there is simply no comparison. I mean I've already talked about how a sack of potatoes has a higher I.Q. Than all three of my opponents combined. But what about the other side of the coin?  Well for your information you are looking at the man who played Brian Daniels better than the first chair fiddle in the local philharmonic! In one moment I managed to not only score a match where I could put an end to Kaise Boetius, but I got Daniels to fast track me right to the National Elite Championship. See while Nobi, and POP are running their mouths and fooling themselves into thinking they ain't gonna get run over like rat underneath a Mack truck, I'm already got the Perfect strategy on how to walk away with the W. while their out there puffing their chests out, I'm sitting back laughing.  Because believe you me, the moment is gonna come where their too busy bickering with each other, and in that spilt second where they'll take their eyes off the ball, that's when I'm gonna put them down for the one, two, three faster than I could snap a selfie!  This Saturday night, it's gonna be all too easy, same as it's gonna be inside that Elimination Chamber match. [/size]


[size=15]Now yes Nobi likes to brag about not getting pinned since the last time he got his ass handed to him. Guess what pal, you haven't been pinned since Dia Del Diablo, well neither have I. Look it up, MY shoulders haven't been counted out since well, to be honest I haven't been pinned at all this season. Oh sure driven thru tables, and tossed over the top, and even an occasional count out. But push come to shove, when my back is to the wall, there hasn't been a man who has gotten a three count on me!  And there is not a chance in hell that you of all people are gonna be the first. How do I know that?  Well considering that you don't have the balls to get pull out all the stops in a match where there aren't any rules, and I am, well that says enough right there.  See what that means is that between the two of us, I'll always go that extra mile to get the win.  Doesn't matter how high I have to climb or how low I have to sink, if it means winning, and more importantly, if it means winning championship gold, I won't have a second thought about it.  So think long and hard about what that means if I decide to bash the few brain cells you have left out of your thick skull with the ring bell. Or if I should decide to shatter your ankle with a steel chair.  Or more simply, your fists aren't gonna do you any good when a sledgehammer turns every bone In your hand to dust!  Make no mistake about it, you may have gotten past Lucas without a weapon, but right now your in the water with a much hungrier shark. Your right in the den with a lion who will chew you up and spit you out quicker than a heartbeat. I am a man who conquers in that ring, while you just drift along. I take charge of the situation and grab my future right by the horns. You  somehow manage to just eek by barely above irrelevance.  That's why you got creamed by a stoned out his goard stark, that's why Your mentor left this company in a disgraceful whimper instead of a shining moment that would have stood for all time!  That's why I'm gonna pin you right in the middle of the ring this week, the same as I’m gonna pin you next week in Lexington. [/size]


[size=15]And POP, you wonder why I haven't gotten any good around my waist. You wonder why I[/size]
[size=15]Haven't gotten a title reign here in my EAW tenure. But the question I would be asking, the one I would be most concerned about, is why whenever that National Elite championship needs a contender I'm the guy who's right there in the thick of the conversation.  Whereever that title goes, I'm following right behind. I'll tell you why, because my talent in that ring is too good to be denied. My style in that ring is as graceful and dominant in a wrestling ring as Muhammad Ali’s was in the boxing ring. My technique is one that is unmatched and unparalleled by any other, least of all some paper champ who's too full of his own shit to swallow the fact that his days of holding my title are numbered!  This Saturday you're gonna get a reminder of just how much substance I have in that ring. You're gonna feel the heat that's coming from the brightest burn star that this company will ever be graced by.   I'll give you a point I'm not as good as you, I'm better in every conceivable way. Don't believe me?  Go on and ask any of followers who have declared me the their undisputed Social Media Champion because I make the guys in the textbook look sloppy. And if you don't believe them than ask my haters a whose eyes are glued to every pic, vid, and status update,  hopping that this will be the time that I fall flat on my face, only for them to be disappointed yet again. Rest assured POPS, there isn't another man who can do it all like I can.  I can take it to the mat, I can brawl, I can give you a catch as catch can classic or a demolition derby in that ring.  And no matter what the situation, no matter the stipulation, no matter what gets thrown my way by anyone fool enough to go toe to toe with me, I rise above it all, and walk away the worldwide trending topic. The guy whose name is on everybody's tongue while they're chatting at the water cooler. Saturday night, you want to see just what makes me so special?  You should be a bit more careful what you wish for. [/size]



[size=15]And as for you Ranger, do yourself a favor this Saturday and just stand on the apron looking like the doofus you are. And pay close attention to the beat down I'm gonna lay on both of the numb nuts in your corner.  Study just how I'm gonna dominate then from bell to bell, because after I get thru with them in Indianapolis, I'll be doing the same to you in Lexington.[/size]


[size=15]So all three of you better get ready because you are about to get a sneak peak of what's gonna happen inside that chamber when my hand gets lifted high. My foot is about to send all your asses a direct message, when it sends each and every one of you sailing thru the front door of the Bridgestone arena!  Get ready because by this time in a few short weeks, there won't even be a question in your minds as to why I am the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero who'll be the sole survivor in he National Elite Championship Elimination Chamber match!  You will all soon have no choice but to start coming correct and recognizing me as Perfection incarnate, and hands down the single greatest professional athlete to ever lace up a pair of boots. You all are gonna have to bow down before “Picture Perfect” Mark Michaels, and like it or not you all will be Picturing THAT![/size]


[size=15]#EAW #Showdown #Saturday”[/size]





[size=15]55,000,000 users liked this. [/size]

[size=15]Showdown Promo #1[/size]



[size=15]@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:[/size]



[size=15]“At the ‘command’ of our egregious Showdown General Manager, Brian Daniels, I am for another week despite my best attempts, stuck having to deal with that Jackass Kaise Boetius. The man who has done every from ride my coat tails, to attack me from behind, to everything else you could possibly do to piss me right the fuck off!  So when you toss him to me in a street fight, it's a lot like a steak being tossed to a starving  lion.   Oh that's rights, see I tried to do this peacefully Daniels, I tried to do this in a way that wouldn't make me tear that fuckhead limb from limb, I tried to do this without having to end this man’s career. So when HIS lawyers start calling, and threatening to sue for the lost wages, just know it'll be on you, his blood is on your hands because you made this happen!  And what's more to give me that extra little spark of motivation you did the worst thing possible for Kaise’s well being, by essentially making this a number one contender’s match for the National Elite Championship. So that gives me all the more reason to put that fucker down once and for all!  You better run a disclaimer for the excessive violence that the people watching are gonna see!  Because this isn't gonna be one of my technical master pieces, this won't be me entertaining an arena filled to the brim with my followers, this will be a public execution.  Because I have put up with all of Kaise’s bullshit for far too long. [/size]



[size=15]And So after months of being obsessed over, stalked, harassed, having my property destroyed,  being assaulted,  and seemingly being weighed down by that dead weight mad man Kaise Boetius, it finally comes to an end between us.  What are the words I'm looking for?  Free at last!  This Saturday night I am free. Free from ever having to deal with a low end curtain jerker like Kaise. Free from having to deal with his crush over me. Free from having to spend my Saturday nights with him in the ring each and every week!  I'll be free of Kaise Boetius, because this Saturday night I'll be free to whatever I please to that rat bastard son of a bitch. If I want to bust his head wide open with a glass selfie stick (#HOG2015), it's fair game. If I want to smash his knee with a steel chair, and till he's a cripple, well that's perfectly fine. This Saturday I am free, no leashes, no holding back, to make Kaise suffer for all the indignity I've had to bare since the day I got stuck carrying his no talent ass in. That tag team match at the beginning of the season.  I finally get to wash my hands clean of the muck I've been handed for the better part of four, long, and trying months.  This Saturday night, I get to wipe away the shit stain on this company’s ass, and in the process, finally get my long deserved National Elite Title Match. [/size]


[size=15]That's right my dear followers, yours truly is on his way to finally, FINALLY, taking[/size]
[size=15]Hold of that National Elite Belt. The same one that has been lingering just out of my grasp for about as long as I can remember. Saturday night I am going to win this street fight (but you already knew that), and finally get the rematch which I am years overdue for.  Nothing short of me getting a life sentence for murdering that dickhead Boetius in the middle of the ring, is gonna keep me from entering that Elimination chamber.  And when I do, I'll run thru POP, and every other talking traffic cones that stand in my way.  That title has rightly been mine , and now it's closer that ever to being placed in my hands. But I'll be more than happy to tell[/size]
[size=15]You all about it next week. [/size]


[size=15]For now I'll just savor every moment that I get to tear Kaise apart. Now I'm sure some of you lesser minded haters are out there saying ‘but Mark, the last time you faced off Kaise sent you running for the hills!”. First off, shut up, second I didn't run from Kaise Boetius, I simply got tired of dealing with him and decided that he is so beneath me, he wasn't even worth another moment of my precious time.  So to reiterate, I was fully willing to eat a count out loss simply so that Kaise can feel like he had his little moment of glory and I could be done with him. This Saturday, there'll be none of that. This Saturday I'll have to simply finish Boetius off for good.  That's the wall I've been backed into, and so that's exactly what I'm going to do. Saturday, everyone in the Allstate arena, as well as everyone watching at home, they better take a good long look at Kaise Boetius, because it's the last anyone is ever gonna see of him in Elite Answers Wrestling![/size]


[size=15]And when I have bested this overhyped, underdeveloped Jackass, I'm going on and doing the same to another five and taking home MY title!  And nothing will stand in my way of doing so because I am the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero to millions of people the whole world round!  The man who when you start something, he finished it. The man who when he wants something, goes out and snatches that mother fucker up!  The man who’s gonna make Kaise Boetius his bitch!  This Saturday night you will see greatness in human form, you will see what happens when you poke the bear for far too long and don't have enough grey matter to run while you have the fucking chance!  This Saturday you are gonna see a man take his destiny into his own hands when rises above his haters, and stands head and shoulders as the undisputed greatest to ever step between the ropes. Come this Saturday, Kaise, Daniels, and every other shit for brains fuck will be picturing THAT![/size]



[size=15]#Showdown #EAW #SaturdayNight.”[/size]





[size=15]54,000,000+users liked this. [/size]

[size=15]Showdown Promo #2[/size]



[size=15]@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:[/size]



[size=15]“You know something followers, while I cherish being the undisputed champion of all social media, and being the absolute most popular athlete in EAW, as well as Professional Wrestling as a whole, there are times when having legions of rabid fans who would trade their right arm just to be I your presence as you pass by without even a second glance can have its downsides. Case In point, a few months ago I give a break and allow him to share my spotlight in my epic Showdown debut victory over EAW hall of famer and current National Elite champion, Prince Of Phenomenal, and now this scraggly looking mongrel can’t go five minutes without my attention. Kaise Boetius, your little plea for anyone, least of all myself, to give a rat’s ass about you has dried up the last of my patience, and struck the last good nerve I had left of you.  But since you just refuse to not be a thorn in my side, since there hasn't been a moment in this season where you're not screwing me out of my rightful opportunities, since you didn't get the simple hint when I walked out on that tag team match a few weeks ago that I am done putting up with your ass, I once again have to take time out of my day to beat your ass from bell to bell and put you back in your rightful place with the rest of the curtain jerkers. This Saturday night, when that bell rings it won't be a match, it'll be more akin to wiping off a piece of toilet paper that got stuck to the bottom of your shoe. This won't be me giving the crowd a five star performance that my followers are accustomed to seeing from me. No, this will be me battering and bruising you like all the out swap meet mid carders I've dealt with in my career here in EAW.   Since I couldn't just wash my hands of, and he done with you, I'm gonna have no choice but to crucify you in the middle of the ring. [/size]

[size=15]Now I know you're somewhere trying to hype yourself up. trying to think back to when you suplexed me thru a flaming table, remembering how you smashed the set of my worldwide trending talk show, and otherwise trying to recall a moment that didn't see me kicking the shit out of you, but really none of that is gonna matter. See this issue is now beyond a professional issue that could be solved with a simple 3 count. If it was, it would have been over and done with when I did exactly that just a few weeks ago. No this is becoming one of those issuers where if I don't nip it right here in the bud, it'll just grow and grow, and I'll stuck with you till one of us ends up in early retirement. So at this moment fuck wins and losses, fuck catch as catch can technique, and fuck everything in regards to athletic competition and Championship contention. This shit that's about to go down on Saturday night isn't a match, it's a goddamn fight, actually it's more like a mugging, because it's gonna be brutal, it's gonna be ugly, and it's gonna after it's all said and done it's gonna  leave you as nothing more than my victim!  You are gonna regret not letting me move on and walk away, you're gonna wish you had just left me be, because this now every strike, every slam, every piece of offense I have to offer, it's coming with bad intentions. For instance, say I've busted you open so bad with mounted punches that the ref has to stop the match for excessive blood loss, and after I refuse to stop pummeling your split skull and the he Disqualifies me, it will all be worth it because it will mean I no longer have to deal with you. Or say I was to lock you in a guillotine, and choke you out till your blue in the face, well short of being dragged away by either the cops or the orderlies, I might not see a point of letting go of that hold. The point I'm trying to get across here is that this match will be your ultimate end. Because I’ve reached the point where having to deal with you week in and week out is more of a headache than it's worth. So Saturday night, you bring your ass down to that ring, you step thru those ropes, and you're gonna get beaten worst than a fucking dog!  [/size]


[size=15]This is fair warning, so don't come crying about it after I do every goddamn thing I said I would. Let this ass whipping be the last you ever see of me, because whatever little I leave of you won't survive another go around with me. That is the level of pissed off you’ve managed to bring about within me. Congrats Kaise, because Of all the flea market fucks I've bitch slapped back to whatever hole they've managed to crawl out of, you've managed to irate me to the point of where I’m coming to prove that I'm the finest product this sport has ever crafted, no, in coming to see to it that you never show your ugly face in an EAW ring ever again. You stirred up a hornet’s nest, you poked the bear, and right now you're staring a bull who's about to run right over you with out a moment of mercy, right in the fucking eye!  I'm putting an end to you, before you fuck with my career any further. I'm kicking your ass so hard, it's gonna hurt just thinking about trying to get some payback for it. I am squashing this come Saturday night, because I have bigger and better thing beckoning me. There are greater chances at glory and infamy here in EAW, and I won't let them pass me by because the match makers decided to appease your temper tantrum throwing ass![/size]



[size=15]I’d say you won't know what hit this Saturday night, but you'll know without a shadow of a doubt that it was the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the Hashtag Hero who is gonna kick your ass all the way to Mount Rushmore and back!  The man who is hands down the single greatest professional athlete to ever lace a pair of boots and step between those ropes.  The man who skills and charisma are unmatched by any other. The man who's combination of speed, strength, and technical acumen has garnered him an army of followers across all of social media who have recognized my natural greatness by declaring me their Social Media Champion!  The man who is perfection incarnate, and the man who is about to teach you never to screw with “Picture Perfect” Mark Michaels, so Kaise go on and Picture THAT! [/size]


[size=15]#Showdown #EAW #FUKB #Saturday’[/size]






[size=15]51,000,000 users liked this [/size]

[size=15]Showdown Promo #2[/size]


[size=15]@PicPerfectMichaels has uploaded a status update:[/size]






[size=15]“You know something, this first months here on Showdown has been a bit of a rollercoaster already.  I've added another hall of famer to the ever grown list of men I've vanquished in the rig.  I’ve proven that I'm still a step quicker both on my feet and in my head than these upstarts like Johnny Nova and Kaise Boetius. But once again I was denied my opportunity at greatness. Once again I was kept from my rematch for the National Elite Championship, and now again I find myself having to lug around a partner I don't like, find a way to coexist with him, and keep his screw ups from costing me a match. It's a challenge yes indeed. It's an almost Herculean task that I'll have to accomplish this Saturday night. Why you might ask?  Why, when I could just phone it in, and not even bother waking out to the ring.  Why, when I can go the Lucas Johnson route and just flap my gums about how I got lucky six months ago to win the New Breed title and thus should be getting a shot at Stark. Why, when I could be taking the night off to heal up from being suplexed off the top rope thru a table that was set on fire!  Two reasons. First I don't half ass anything. I give every last ounce of blood, and sweat I have in my body each and every time out. There's no less effort given on my part no matter who I'm in the ring with. From guys like POP and Nova, to DeDeDe and Scott Oasis, I leave it all[/size]
[size=15]In that ring, because for me there is no tomorrow.  There is no fight more important than the one I'm right in the middle of. There's no holding back.  When I go out there, I do all that I need to, to make damn well sure that everyone knows that they are seeing the best in the world, giving the best of himself.  [/size]


[size=15]The second reason is because I am destined for great things here in EAW. Title wins, marque match ups, my face on EAW Ice Cream Bars (available at fine grocery stores nation wide).  That's what's laying in store for me.  That's what is just up ahead along the road.  Besting the most dominant tag team in recent history is a hell of a feat to most men, for me it's par for the course.  It's what's expected of me from the management, it's what's expected of me from my all my followers, it's what I expect of myself.  So will beating the High Rollers in what can very easily become a 3 on 1 handicap match be a challenge?  Yeah you bet. But it's one that I am more than game for.  It's moments like these that I love because when I do it, when I have my hand raised in victory, it'll be another great chance to tell all my haters those words that every man, woman, and child love uttering. It'll be another chance to say, I told you so.  Yes just like I told everyone that I would beat Scott Oasis quicker than I could snap My fingers, and just like I told Prick of Phenomenal that I would do the same to him, I am saying to everyone who is reading this, that I will overcome the odds and pin Ripley and Davidson 1-2-3 in the middle of the ring.  And in a single match I'll not only have beaten one champion, I'll have beaten two. And with that win, Brian Daniels will have no choice but to give me everything I desire on a silver platter. Money, my face on every billboard, and most importantly Championship gold fitted around my waist.  All of it is mine for the taking. All I need to do is dispatch with the short sighted, Michaels envy suffering bastards in my way. [/size]

[size=15]Now some of you might be out there saying ‘yeah, yeah, we've heard this all before’.  To all you doubting dickheads out there I'd like to say shit the fuck up. Good things come to those who wait, and since I am Perfection incarnate, it just takes a bit for everything to be in a place where it doesn't get any bigger, or better.  Yes, when my time comes, rest assured that there will never be another one like it. When my moment in the sun arrives, nobody will ever shine brighter.  Because that is the kind of man I am. That is why I'm the only one here in the entire company worthy of carrying all of EAW on his back. I am the man who people will think of whenever you say the word Wrestling.  I am the icon of his industry, the face of the sport. I'm he one who possesses the skills, the determination, the charisma, and the physical endurance necessary to bare the torch and no just keep it burning, but using it to blaze a new trail for future generations to follow.  That's what I am doing, and beating those two low life degenerates, is gonna be a great first step. With that victory, I'll take a giant leap in climbing this mountain they call Elite Answers Wrestling.  With this win, it'll be another brick into making this company the house that Mark Michaels built. [/size]


[size=15]So Jack, David, don't take this beat down too personally. And Kaise, try not to catch a case of the feels for me this time.  Because what's happening this Saturday night is all business. What's going to take place from the second I step thru the curtain to the roaring cheers of all my Friends, Followers, and Subscribers in Barcelona, to the moment that bell rings, well that's all just me doing what I gotta do to get what I'm due.  I'm getting mine, and if I gotta kick the crap out of you so be it.  If I leave an ever lasting boot print on each of your asses, well then hey, that's what I got to do. I am a man who is worshipped by men and women from each and every part of this world and you boys are gonna lean first hand exactly why.  You're both in for an top shelf, A number 1, top of the heap, routing from bell to bell. You both get see what exactly has made me the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the Hashtag Hero that won't stop till everyone falls in line and recognizes just who is really the alpha male here in EAW.  The head of the pack. You, and all the rest of boys in the back are gonna to start coming correct whenever you are in the presence of the brightest burning star that EAW will ever know, and the single greatest professional athlete ever to step between the ropes.  From here on out You are all gonna start learning to show respect to your undisputed Social Media Champion, Picture Perfect Mark Michaels, and by the time we’re done on Showdown, you will[/size]
[size=15]Be Picturing THAT![/size]


[size=15]#EAW #Showdown #Saturday #HighRollerzGoBust #FuckThatZ”[/size]





[size=15]55,000,000 users liked this. [/size]

[size=15]Dia Del Diablo Promo #4[/size]


[size=15]@PicPerfcectMichaels has posted a status update:[/size]


[size=15]
[/size]




[size=15]“You know it just never ceases to amaze me. the fact that any damn fool can yammer on and on about himself till he’s blue in the face. Especially when their either over the hill, or tripping over their own feet. Whenever I hear a simpleton run his mouth from sun up to sun down, the only thing I can do is shake my head, laugh it off, and then beat the living shit out of them for disrespecting my natural perfection. [/size]

[size=15]That's what I do, I put people in their proper place, from every comment on social media, to every word I speak on a microphone, to every beat down I dish out every single week on Showdown, I let people know where they belong in this world.  Now some (such as myself) are above others because they possess greater amounts of talent than others. And the rest (such as the four stooges I’m facing Saturday night) serve only to either bow down and recognize our greatness, or drift along blissfully unaware of how truly insignificant they are, all the while puffing out their chest and taking up how they're hot shit. It seems that their isn't a week that goes by where this isn't the case, some halfwit runs his mouth, and I have to smack him around for a while till he comes back to reality.  Wash, rinse, repeat. [/size]


[size=15]Oh sure some of these jackasses get an extra moment or two where they can keep their heads in the clouds, but in the end, the guy with the superior skills in that ring, always comes out on top. So make no mistake about it, when the bell rings this Saturday night, and smoke clears, the dust settles, and every other turn of phrase is said, I'm the one will be standing tall. [/size]


[size=15]Yes I will POP,  see while you don't think of me as a threat, I've battled men who you wish you could be, took their best shots, and threw a few right back at them. I’ve been here for two years tearing thru chumps like you who thought that just because they were hot shit five years, that it somehow means they're not broken down and washed up. You talk about people walking on egg shells whenever they're around you in the locker room, well step right up to your face and knock your goddamn lights out!  I don't respect you, and I sure as hell don't fear you, because when you've been thru Hell’s Warpath, and stared Hades straight in the eye as he makes his way to the ring. When you've taken on hall of famers like Y2Impact and Mr.DeDeDe in a glass Gauntlet match, when you've been went thru hell and back to earn a bit of respect from the people who matter in this company, no past his prime prick is anything close to threatening. See I don't really care if you snap or not, I don't really care about anything you do at save for when you talk shit about me, and I need to remind you about whose the top dog in this company nowadays.  After I beat you (again, because Tag Matches DO count) you'll have no choice but to get in line, and join all the other haters who are gonna have to kiss my ass when I stamp my name for that National Elite Championship match.  [/size]

[size=15]You talk about leaving in a better position than you entered with. There is zero chance of that happening at Dia Del Diablo. When we face off, I'm gonna prove that I'm not like any of these flash in the pan fucks. I'm the ironman of EAW because I've been grinding and scratching and clawing my way to get this chance. And there is no way that some old nostalgia act who doesn't even know that A.) he's wrestling for a title shot and B.) doesn't even know the name of the fucking belt he's chasing after, is gonna fuck it up for me. This Saturday I Guarantee that you’ll exit not with a bang but with a whimper. When I drop your ass thru that table, I'll show you that I'm the biggest thing in this company here and now, Maybe then you'll get it thru your thick head that There's nothing, and no one better than me because there's no such thing as being better than Perfect!  You will find this out be hard way, when I send your legacy and your body up in smoke. [/size]



[size=15]And Kaise, what the fuck are you smoking/snorting/freebasing that makes you think you're even half a step ahead of me. So let me get this straight, you intentionally lost matches, because if somehow me, or Nobi, or Nova lose another it means you won?  I think you need to get your head checked their buddy, maybe all hits to the head I gave you last week got to you. That's to be expected when you just suddenly change from being a stiff in a suit who never fought a day in his life, to trading bombs in the middle of the ring with someone who wouldn't give two shits whether or not you get so concussed that you can't even stand straight. You're calling this a war, well the best one to compare it to is Grenada, cause I'm ending this sooner than it started. You want to see my dreams crushed, and everything I've spent my life in devotion to burn right down to the ground?  Get in line, cause there's a whole locker room of Michaels envy suffering shits like you who want the exact same thing. And just like every single one of them, I'm gonna beat your ass time and again until I get bored, and do the same to the next in line. [/size]

[size=15]So do yourself a favor Kaise, when I'm done beating you from pillar to post, and I go on to have an incredible run as the National Elite Champion, don't go around bitching a moaning that I didn't give you fair warning, or that you just took me too lightly. Because I've already beaten you once, and I'll be more than happy to beat you again and again. You step on up, I send you right back down. You try to test me, and you’ll get knocked right down on your ass.  You are dealing with a top tier, once in a life time talent, the Jordan, the Babe Ruth, the Joe Montana of pro wrestling.  And you should be thankful for having the opportunity to share time in the ring with me.  You keep asking if this is my time to break out, you're goddamn right it is!  Not only am I going to shatter that glass ceiling you keep mentioning to smithereens, I am going take down every last one of bastards who have been ducking me, and rise above all of them, till I'm the only one standing at the top of the EAW mountain. You said it yourself, I'm the favorite to win this match, maybe you should think about just why that is. [/size]


[size=15]And Johnny Nova, just because you went down to the Minor leagues, and finally won a match, doesn't mean jack shit when you stand against the league MVP. Beating a few dipshits by sheer luck, doesn't impress me. Call me when you've faced someone with someone who has some modicum of talent. Till then keep your your fucking mouth shut, before I decide to hurt you worst than I already am at Dia Del Diablo.  Because what's worst, being a ‘momma’s boy’, or getting your ass handed to you by one?  Sunday Morning you're gonna know with out a doubt that Mark Michaels is the genuine article of in ring perfection. He's no fraud, he's the real deal, when it comes to sending good for nothing bastards like you back to the Ghetto via a first class seat in the end of my boot.  I'm gonna knock you so hard upside the head, that mongoloid looking beard will go flying into the fifth row. [/size]

[size=15]So keep telling yourself that you're “machismo” will keep you from getting beat down like there's no tomorrow. Johnny, not a damn thing is gonna keep me from outright embarrassing you from the second that bell rings, till the moment arrange a meeting between you and the flame coming off the table!  Nova, when you get carted off in a stretcher, maybe you'll understand why you should have never screwed with Mark Michaels. Or at the very least, you'll learn not to sucker punch a man who can and will end your career in split second. [/size]


[size=15]And that just leaves Lucas coming in last (kinda like every foot race your fat ass has ever been in).  You know for some reason I can never figure out can have managed to have your head rammed so far up your ass that you think that deserve a goddamn thing just for showing up.  I mean you keep getting all your facts twisted, saying one F-5 had me down for the count. Last I checked I'm still here and ready to beat you up and down the I-35. Or how you single handedly eliminated me from the Hell Warpath to win the New Breed title. Las I checked it took a chokeslam, a chokebomb, a shot to the nuts with a cane, a dozen body blows with brass knuckles, a kimura, and an F-5 to put me down in that one. Oh and you had the advantage of not having to even bother with half the match because you were the last guy to walk out thru the curtain. This time, thing are different, for one, you'll have to look me in the eye from bell to bell. There won't be any last minute entrances, or blindside attacks after I've  dispatched with one of the pathetic peons who couldn't hope to touch me in that ring.  And that includes yourself Lucas, because whether you can admit it or not we both know that I've already far surpassed you. I've always been the better between the two of us, and I've always called you out on all the bullshit you constantly spout off.  Bring your best shot Lucas, throw everything you got at me, because I don't want to hear your moaning when I send you to the back with yet another scratch in your loss Column.  This time Lucas there is no getting around me. You are gonna have to beat me, and to do that you’re gonna have to stand in front and face me.  And to do that you are gonna have to find enough manhood about you, to take on the single greatest professional athlete to ever lace a pair of boots!  You talk about waking us to reality, Sunday morning I'll be waking up to being the number one contender to the National Elite Championship. And you'll be waking up to that one little fact that you've been in denial about for the last six months, Mark Michaels just better than you are, have been, or ever will be. [/size]



[size=15]So come on down because you are about to dance with the Devil in Dallas. You're all about to see the rise of the brightest burning star that this company has ever been graced with. You are all about to witness the rise of the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero who’ll not stop till he walks out holding gold up over his head.  At Dia Del Diablo, I will be bringing the heat in this flaming tables match. I will come out like a house of fire from the moment I step thru that curtain. This Saturday night all four of you get to figure out that when you play with Mark Michaels, you're gonna get burned. So go ahead and Picture THAT![/size]


[size=15]#EAW #DiaDelDiablo #Saturday”[/size]




[size=15]53,000,000 users liked this.  [/size]

[size=15]Dia Del Diablo Promo #2[/size]



[size=15]@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:[/size]

[size=15]“Right now my dear followers, I'm lying by here in bed, tossing and turning, my eyes wide open, unable to drift away to a peaceful sleep. Now as you probably can figure out, it's because of this week’s Dia Del Diablo pay per view, but not for the reasons most might suspect ( or to be more accurate suspect if it were anyone besides myself in this position). It's not because I'm worried about being able to beat any of my opponents this Saturday, lord knows I could beat the hell out of every single one of them with one arm behind my back.  It's not because I'm suffering from some sort of performance anxiety, because I always exceed everyone’s expectations every time I step thru that curtain.  Its not even being worried about my perfect body suffering and scars of burn marks. [/size]

[size=15]No, I’m wide awake writing this post because right now, I'm like a kid at Christmas. And this Saturday night I'm going to unwrap the opportunity to claim the National Elite Championship. That belt, which was less than a stone’s throw away the last time I competed for it. which was so close I could already imagine the weight of it resting in my hands. It's was so close it was practically mine!  But because of the actions of some Michaels envy suffering shithead, what was without a doubt my title, slipped thru my fingers.  I won the match, but the lost the war so to speak. And since then it has vexed me, it has haunted me that I would have cemented place in EAW history, and maybe would have been shown the proper respect from everyone in that locker room. It has eaten away at me for over a year and a half, because in that time not only have I not been anywhere near that title (never given a rematch, never even given a number one contender match for it.), I haven't had a one on one opportunity at any other championship since!  I've had to run thru triple threat matches where some jackass would get pinned and somehow I'd be ruled as having lost. I've been stuck in car wrecks like the Hell’s Warpath where I would battle, beat on half the haters in that match, just for some flash in the pan fuck to come in, sweep up the leftovers, and steal away the New Breed Championship. Hell just two weeks ago I competed in a ring of fire battle royal. Why, you may be asking?  Because not one of those five could pin me clean in the middle of the ring.  So to give them a fighting chance, or better yet to tip the odds in their favor, the only thing they had to do was throw me over the top rope. And even there, just when I was poised to get the one thing I had been aching for, Johnny Nova puts his filthy hands on me. Leave it to the goody two shoes who has to suck up to the lowest I.Q.s in the crowd for anyone to care, to sucker punch you and rob you blind!  Goddamn I am pissed at so much that has happened since the night the National Elite championship was almost mine. But funny thing is, all of it, all of it won't matter the second that bell rings and my hand is raised. All the setbacks and disappointments, all the bumps and bruises, all the effort and energy wasted on what felt like treadmill in mid card hell, all of it will vanish the second that belt is wrapped around my waist. [/size]


[size=15]None the bullshit that has weighed me down for the past 19 months will even be a thought, because this Saturday night, the people of Dallas are gonna see the fire of hell that’s been lit under me. They are gonna witness a man who will battle like never before, and run over every mother fucker in his path. In a flaming tables Elimination five way match (say that three times fast), I will do anything it takes to walk away with a win, ANYTHING!  I don't care if I have to put  all four of my opponents thru Tables myself, I don't care if I have to cripple and Maim these sons of bitches, I don't even care if it takes years off my career to do so. I am coming to the American Airlines arena with one intent. And come hell or high water, I am going to win this match, and head on to Territorial Invasion where I can finally exorcise this demon from me.  I'll get this goddamn monkey off my back, and prove to the world that I am every bit as good as I say I am.  When the smoke has cleared, there will be one man standing  head and shoulders above the rest of the competition this Saturday. There will be one clear winner, who without a shadow of a doubt go on to become the new EAW National Elite Champion, and that man will be me #Facts[/size]



[size=15]Now sure, everyone in this match is gonna run their mouth about wanting it more, or deserving it more. But anyone with a lick of sense already knows that There isn't a man alive who deserves that shot more than I do. None of them are hungrier than I am.  None of them have put in the extra hours in the gym, or have studied every piece of footage they can get their hands on the way I have. None of them have had to deal with even half the bullshit I've had to. From a former GM who wouldn't know true talent if it bit him, to the halfwits in the crowd who hate me because they ain't me, I've was buried up to my goddamn eyeballs with all the crap they were giving me. But it's a new dawn, and not one son of a bitch is gonna keep me from getting mine.[/size]


[size=15]No you won't Lucas, yeah I already know that your fat head is just about ready to spout off some ridiculous bullshit about how your the baddest mother fucker waking the hallway, but you and me both know that in a straight up match, you wouldn't stand a chance. Now sure you've been able to pull a couple of rabbits right out of your ass, but I think we’re more than well aware that your little lucky streak is dead and buried, and this Saturday I'm. Gonna heap that l last Handful of dirt on top and pack it all down. When your flabby ass goes thru that  table, When it hits the fire, I’ll be grinning ear to ear. Because since this year began. You been about the biggest thorn in my side. It seemed like everywhere I turned, there you were.  And every time we stepped into the ring, you showed time and again that you didn't have enough talent to beat me one on one. Hell you didn't even have the balls to look me in the eyes like a man until after you had blindsided me, and threw Anthony Leonhart into our match so that you'd have someone you could pin at Burning Desire. But what a difference just a few short weeks could make. Now here you are, desperate for a win, clinging to what little relevance you have, and praying to god that it doesn't come down to you and me at Dia Del Diablo. Let me tell you right now Lucas, that there's no angle for you to get around me this time. You're not gonna enter the ring after I've taken the kind of punishment that most men wouldn't be able to come back from like you did in Hell’s Warpath, and you're gonna get the win without beating me like you did at Burning Desire.  This time Lucas you and me are on a head on collision course, and this time, I'm running over you like fucking freight train!  [/size]

[size=15]This time Lucas, you're fat ass is mine, and I guarantee this Saturday night that I am gonna roast you over a roaring fire like the overgrown s'more you are. And when I do, the last bits of your hype will go up in smoke before your very eyes. [/size]


[size=15]Kinda like POP’s comeback thus far. You know something POP, the more I hear you speak, the more I keep hoping that someone will stuff that ignorant, Emo mouth of yours. I mean come on man how man weeks have you been back?  And in all this time you can't even bother to learn that the name of the title ( as well as the fucking company) is Elite, not Extreme. I swear, you are so stuck in the past it's not even funny. You're like wearing a throwback jersey all the time, at first it's cool because of the nostalgia about it, but then you look around and that the game has evolved and become an entirely different beast than it was before. In the time you've been gone, this company's talent have elevated it to a whole new stratosphere of what happens in that ring.  So keep on doing this Wizards era Jordan act all you want, the fact of the matter is that you can't hang anymore with even the middle of the pack here in EAW, much less the man who is hands down the single greatest professional wrestler alive today.  And you know what the really sad thing is POP, I would have said you should have stayed in 2010, but after hearing your whinny ass mumbling for a month, its painfully obvious that you already are. Well POP, if I were you , I'd step my has been ass aside and make way for the future of this industry. I'd recognize the man who was leading that next generation and pass the torch as only proper, because if not he’d be snatching it right out of my hand. POP, you had better get ready because I am about to beat you from pillar to post on my way to the top of the EAW mountain. This Saturday night when I beat your ass (again) I will take my next step towards being recognized as the new face of Elite Answers Wrestling. [/size]


[size=15]Oh and Johnny Nova, you know every single time we step in the ring together, you manage to make more of an ass out of yourself. From your tacky, gaudy, and let's face it, gender inappropriate ring gear, to the fact that you developed this split personality where one second you're a serious competitor who had to scratch and claw his way out of the slums just to get a shot at making a living in the sport of professional wrestling, the next you're the weird, coked up, outer space cowboy with a bad case of sudden onset Batman voice.  Johnny, you think yourself he cream of the crop? You're nothing more than cow piss in neon tights. For the love of God man get your shit together, and drop the fucking gimmick. But all that is an aside to the fact that two weeks ago you screwed me out of the National Elite championship match. I haven't forgotten it, how you hit me from behind because you didn't have enough balls to stand toe to toe with me.  Rest assured that you have pissed me off royally, and I am going to kick the ever loving shit right out of you.  You are gonna be my bitch from the moment that bell rings, and there is not a goddamn thing you can do to stop me! Johnny when I slam you thru that table, and you feel those flames Stinging you worst than you can possibly imagine, just know that you brought this all on yourself. See, nobody ever gets one over on Mark Michaels, not for long anyways. And in the end I'm always the one who stands on top, and I'll be damned straight to hell if your overhyped, underdeveloped ass is gonna be an exception to that rule. I’m the one who stands tall in the end, Always have, always will because there is not a man, woman, or child who could ever hope to change than because no one on the fate of this earth is better than perfect.  [/size]

[size=15]Johnny, this is fair warning, when I'm done with you, you're gonna regret the day you ever crossed paths with Mark Michaels. [/size]




[size=15]And that just leaves Kaise Boetius. You find everything I have to say as humorous. Let me tell you pal, there won't be anything funny about me kicking your fucking teeth in this Saturday. Now let's get a few things straight here, first while I did give you some credit for not stumbling over your own feet like so many other tag partners I've had, i didn't exactly heap that much praise on you.  Certainly not to the degree that has you saying I'm basically your biggest fanboy. Look jack, all I ever said was you handled yourself well enough while I was carrying you. Second, i have proven how damn good I am in that ring. I did so against legends like Hades, Mr.DeDeDe, and Y2Impact. I’ve outshined top prospects, and outclassed living legends. I've taken the best shots from some of the best to ever enter the business, and I'm still standing here undeterred and motivated like a mother fucker. So while I am sick and tired of being forced to sit at the kids table with guys like you and Nova, I'll do it because that National Elite title match is what I desire most at this moment. [/size]

[size=15]You think that you're the first guy whose ever been in a multiman match where the winner becomes the next in line for a championship opportunity about as soon as he wakes thru the door?  The real thing about this company isn't just about being a contender for a title once, it's what happens when you get so close you can practically taste it, and then moments later he wondering where did it all go wrong for you.  It's about not just being a flash in he pan who gets the novelty push just because they're new around here. But being the workhorse week after week, year after year, and leaving whatever's inside you out in the ring.  I have no limits in the ring or on the mic because My combination of speed, strength, technique, and charisma is absolutely perfect.  That's why I'm a real person as you would put it, because I say exactly what I mean, and I do everything I say I will. So when I tell you that I'm the one whose winning at Dia Del Diablo, that I'm the man who'll be he last man standing while the rest of you go down in flames, that I am gonna be a house of fire in that ring while the rest of you are just a bunch dying embers, you all had better believe that it's as good as gospel. [/size]

[size=15]Kaise, Saturday night you get to see just why I'm the biggest thing to hit Showdown in quite a long time. You'll get to see what makes me the brightest burning star this company has, and when I outclass you four jackoffs, you'll know exactly why I am the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero whose image of him emerging victorious will live forever on social media. It will be the most liked, the most re-posted, and the only topic of discussion for all of my Friends Followers, and subscribers from every corner of the globe. I am gonna tear thru you Kaise, and the other three like red hot glowing knife thru butter. And once I do, I'll be on to save my National Elite Championship from the douchebag who'll be keeping it warm for me, then I'll finally get a good night’s sleep knowing I've righted an enormous wrong. This will be exactly what happens at Dia Del Diablo, because when you step into a flaming tables match against the hottest star on Showdown, you're gonna get burned. So why don't all of you take a good long moment and start to Picture THAT![/size]


[size=15]#EAW #DiaDelDiablo #Unstopable”[/size]




[size=15]55,000,000 users liked this. [/size]

[size=15]Showdown Promo # 3[/size]




[size=15]@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:[/size]



[size=15]“As I sit back here after an amazing day at the gym, and really reflect on everything that's about to happen in the not too distant future, all I can say is some people #CoughKAISEBOETIUSCough. Really need to learn when to keep their fucking mouths shut. I mean the nerve of this man, the fact that he would ever compare me to the pathetic peons in this company, shows just how out of touch he truly is. He says he really didn't need this match, I'm calling bullshit. If you didn't need it, you wouldn't have stepped between the ropes knowing that your ass could be set on fire (word is fire is something you don't have a great history with.), if you didn't need that ring of fire battle royal, you would have sat out on the sidelines and wouldn't have even bothered. Who did you out preform?  Lucas Johnson, and POP?  Hell I've been calling them both out for being way over rated for what seems like forever.  And I know for a fact that there is no way in hell you could ever be thinking you out preformed me, hell even Nobi, the guy who won didn't outdo me in that ring. He would have been charbroiled if it hadn't been for that rat bastard Johnny Nova. So again I ask, who did you out preform last week?[/size]

[size=15]You say you've passed with flying colors on your start here in EAW, mother fucker you have a Losing record. Besides a win over Johnny Nova, you've been eliminated from the two battle royals, and lost that number one contenders match on NEO.  And while we're on the subject of setting the record straight, you never carried me for a single second, in fact two weeks ago if it hadn't been for me your shoulders would have been pinned one, two, three in the center of the ring (much like they will this Saturday on Showdown). So I wouldn't talk too much about getting off to a great start, because aside from a win which you can attribute to me, your ass has been getting beaten from pillar to post just about every time you walk out to that ring. [/size]

[size=15]And whatever working accord we had is out the window?  Fine by me. I've been leaving jackasses like you laid out in he middle of the ring staring up at the lights all by myself for years just fine.  I won't be going easy on your ungrateful ass any more.  This Saturday I am going to beat you right in the middle of that ring, and not only will you be the next to do so this week, but at Dia Del Diablo you, and the other three halfwit hacks are each gonna grilled like Texas BBQ.  That's right, I'm putting each of you thru a flaming table, and moving on to bigger and better things. [/size]


[size=15]But don't think I'm overlooking you this week Kaise, you want to call me Inferior?  My friend I am far from it. I  am the man whose combination of speed, strength, and technical acumen can be described with only one word, Perfection!  That's right, now I know that you'll probably come back with some bullshit that boils down to you saying ‘I'm a bad mother fucker, you better not mess with me.’, listen here pal i’ve retired more men than social security. I've been sending assholes like you running for the hills.  I've beaten hall of famers, hell I even beat a man for custody of his child just to stick one to him! Don't walk around talking about how bad you are because I've been in the ring with men you couldn't even hope to compare to. I've Stared Methsulah in the eyes, I've wrestled with Hades the hell raiser, I've gone toe to toe with Eclipse Diemos, and all of them never wanted to deal with me again, because one ass whipping from me was enough to last them a lifetime. Kaise, this Saturday in the Pepsi Center, you're gonna see why Scott Oasis turned tail and ran, your gonna see the guy who took Zack Crash, HBG, and Y2Impact to their limits. You are gonna get the absolute best of Mark Michaels. [/size]


[size=15]So get ready, Because while I have stated that you showed some talent in the ring, make no mistake about it, you are never, ever, going to be better than perfect.  You say you're a fighter, I say you're sloppy, everything you do in that ring just reeks of a rookie who barely knows a wristband from a wrist lock.  This Saturday, I'll be more than happy to demonstrate the finer points of being in that ring with every suplex, strike, slam, and hold, till you end up catching a Screen Cracker to the face, or getting your head planted into he may via a Picture Perfect. [/size]


[size=15]This Saturday, I'm gonna show you that the only thing you got right about Mark Michaels is that he will burn on forever as the brightest Star that this company will ever know. Yes h are about to see the skills that have won me an army of friends, followers, and subscribers who are. All just itching to see me beat the ever loving shit out of you from bell to bell!  You're about to find out exactly why my followers have made me the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero who will be coming to Dia Del Diablo with the intention of beating all four of you shit taking loudmouths so that he could save the National Elite Championship from the likes of Stark and Nobi.  You are about to go toe to toe with the single greatest professional athlete to ever lace a pair of boots and step between the ropes. You are stepping into the ring with greatness itself, Perfection incarnate. So when it's my hand being raised, and your ass taking the walk of shame back thru the curtain, don't say I didn't warn you so.  Go on ahead and start to Picture THAT bitch![/size]


[size=15]#Showdown #Saturday #EAW #FUKB[/size]





[size=15]54,000,000 users liked this. [/size]

[size=15]Showdown Promo #5[/size]




[size=15]@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:[/size]


[size=15]“You know as I sit back in my hotel, I can't help but to think that I It's amazing to me how some people just don't know when to shut the fuck up and admit defeat. Johnny Nova is one of these people because no matter how many times he's gotten his ass beat, he keeps on yapping like there's no tomorrow. He doesn't know any of the guys who I put out to pasture, that's the fucking point asshole!  You're just like the no name losers I've sent back to wrestling at flea markets and swap meets. You're just like all the others who talked a big game, and then ran head first into the wall they call Mark Michaels. I can't begin to tell you how many times I've sent jokers like you into early retirement, but I can tell you that every time I did, I was smiling ear to ear. Because I can't stand to see this company stained by shits like you Johnny. This is the home of the Elite, and I will do everything in my power to keep it that way. [/size]

[size=15]You get all hot over me telling off the pair of morons dumb enough to root for you, you keep trying to make it out as if I have something against the whole crowd. I have million upon millions of friends, followers and, subscribers, who worship the ground I walk on. so i don't really give a fuck if I ruffle the feathers of the few haters who show up every week. I am the most beloved superstar in EAW, regardless of what any of those peabrained jerk offs think. I am bigger than this company, I'm bigger than this sport, or at the very least I'm bigger than you and all your goofy looking bullshit gimmicks. You want to talk about my wardrobe, at least I'm shopping at the best designer brands for men who prefer the finer things in life, instead of the barging basement at the women’s section of Goodwill. [/size]


[size=15]You want try and toss me over the top tomorrow night, by all means step on up and I'll be glad to kick your ass all the way back to 8 mile road. You don't care about what I wear, or what I say, well after I wrap that National Elite Championship around my waste, you will. So will every other one of you overhyped underdeveloped dickheads. [/size]

[size=15]You want to talk about Survival, mother fucker you're looking  at the Bear Giles of EAW. The man who has been here day after day, week after week.  Most who walk thru the door have a shelf life of less than a month. I've been here two years and outlasted with every one of the guys who though they were the next big thing. I'm the ironman of EAW, I'm. The guy who keeps on tearing thru chumps like you.  I'm the man who has worked everyday to become the top dog here in EAW.  And believe you me, this dog is chew you up and spit you out like an old bone. [/size]


[size=15]So go ahead and keep drinking your own kool aid, keep buying into your own bullshit. When it's all said and done you'll end up on the losing end of things, just like you always seem to be. [/size]


[size=15]Tomorrow night, get ready to get your ass handed to you… again.  Courtesy of the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, and #Hero who is gonna ram his fist down your throat and his foot up your ass. Tomorrow night you are about to see first hand what has made me the single greatest professional athlete to ever lace a pair of boots. It all goes down tomorrow night.  That's when I'll stand with my hand raised high, so why don't you button your lips Johnny and start to Picture THAT![/size]


[size=15]#EAW #Showdown #RingOfFireBattleRoyal”[/size]



[size=15]54,000,000 users liked this. [/size]

[size=15]Showdown Promo #2[/size]


[size=15]@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:[/size]



[size=15]“As I woke up this morning, my eyes shot open. Not because an alarm was blaring (I actually beat it by 20 minutes), not because I heard footsteps ( She was out like a light from last night). No, it was because the one thing that repeats in my mind, the thought that'll be waking me up every morning, and make me shoot out of bed and into the gym. The only idea that will run thru my mind again and again till I drift back to sleep. The one thing that my mind is dead set on winning this six man ring of fire battle royal, and going on to Dia Del Diablo. My all consuming goal, is to walk thru the fire and flames of five other contenders and step forward to get my shot at Stark. My only thought is being the last man standing in that ring, both this Saturday night and on July 29th, and rise about the smoke and ashes to hold that National Elite Championship in my hands.  This is what has lit a fire under my hotter than hell and damnation. The chance to take hold of a title that should have been mine, to right the wrong that has relegated me the low end of the totem poll.  To win not just a title, but vindication and validation of my entire EAW tenure, I am willing to jump right outta of the frying pan while the burners at turned all the way to max. [/size]


[size=15]This Saturday night, Murrow wants a ring of fire?  Well I'll be more than happy to bring the gas and the matches, you five assholes can be the kindling that's I’ll use to set the Mavrik Center on fire with Michaels fever!  [/size]

[size=15]You got that Johnny Nova?  What the hell have you been smoking?!  First it was the tacky clothing, now this week you think you're an inspiration?  Who the fuck would be inspired by a man who constantly comes up short, even when he has a hall of famer to carry him?!  You talk about being a survivor, listen buddy nothing you went thru in that crack house you grew up in, can prepare your for the human demolition derbies I've been a part of. Glass Gauntlets, Hell’s Warpaths, and now this ring of fire battle royal. You can talk about surviving when you done all of that and put up with two years of being squandered by having to wrestle low level chumps  like you!  I'm a survivor here in EAW, I'm the ironman who keeps showing up week after week and stealing the show no matter where he is on the card. [/size]

[size=15]Johnny, You think that this week is gonna be the time you finally real thru that glass ceiling and do the one thing that has eluded you from the day you set foot in this company, win a match?  Buddy, you repeat your bullshit about as much as Lucas Johnson does. In this ring of fire battle royal, you're not gonna rise from the ashes like a Phoenix, you're gonna be tossed out like an burnt and blackened turkey. You apologized to the two people who  gave you some pity cheers last week, but have you apologized to me for The insults you hurled at me?  Even though I kicked your ass up and down the arena last week, I'm still waiting. Just like I'll be waiting after shipping you back to the locker room via a first class ride in the end of my shoe (I would have sent you back to Detroit, but that city has it bad enough without you dragging it thru the mud with every time you mention that you grew up there)!  This is EAW, ELITE Answer Wrestling, and there is nothing Elite about some area code dropping jackass, who's biggest bragging right is the fact that he LOST at Pain For Pride. When you actually get a victory over one opponent, than maybe I might take into consideration anything you have to say about winning this battle royal. Till then, step aside and let the man who has beaten hall of Famers and is the leader of this new era here on Showdown. Don't even think of trying the man who is the new face of EAW, because if last week wasn't evidence enough, there is no way in hell that your ass could ever be better than Perfect!  [/size]


[size=15]And Prince Of Phenomenal, here you go yapping away again, maybe getting POPped in the mouth once wasn't enough for you to get it thru your thick skull that you just can't hang with the absolute best that this company has to offer.  And I know your ego is about the size of Utah, but come on man, at least Johnny Nova had the common sense enough to recognize that I whipped both your asses last Saturday. He knew enough that it ain't a damn thing changing this week.  Speaking of change, get with the times man. Your all Extremist this, and National Extreme that. It's a new day here in EAW, one that is about finding the absolute top of the top, the best of the best. This is now the home of the Elite, and when you talk about your that top of the line, all time great, you have to be taking about Mark Michaels. Because I'm not just some chump who walked in off the streets, I'm not just some overrated bastard who can't let go of the past and face the facts that that this company, and all these people from every part of the globe have moved on and have found a new idol to watch in awe of every time he steps into the ring.  You think you're gonna end my career? Motherfucker Better men than you have tried, and I'm still standing. I've been in the ring with legends such as Mr. DeDeDe, Hades, Y2Impact, and Zack Crash. I sent Scott Oasis running for the hills, and no matter what he throws at me, Lucas Johnson can't be rid of me!  If they couldn't take me out, what fucking chance do you have pal?  This Saturday night I'm tossing you over the top rope and your body will go up in flames just like your entire comeback!  [/size]


[size=15]You want to get back to the prominence you once held, I say you you had better start wising up and recognize the fact that you were in the ring with a talent whose skills and charisma will never be equaled. You should be honored that you got to step into my ring and pass the torch to the next National Elite Champion.  [/size]


[size=15]Kaise, you've made a smart play, you've put the rest of the bitches on blast, but you've kept quiet about me. For that I commend you. See far too often these Michaels Envy suffering shits will speak from a place of jealousy, and I would have to put them back in there proper place.  But you, your a lot smarter than that. Now while I appreciate the show of intelligence, don't think for a second that I won't send you sailing down to the floor ringside. It's a dog eat dog world, and every man is out for himself in this one. But I'll tell you what, you keep playing nice, and I'll take it easy on you, not much, certainly not enough for you to take advantage of my graciousness and screw me out of that title shot. But where I'm fixing to send a message to Stark with every Elimination, I'll let you leave with your head up on this one. The won't humiliate and embarrass you the way I'm gonna with Pop, and Johnny, and Nobi, and Lucas. I'm not gonna go out of my way to squash you like an insect. But believe you me, if you test me, if I even think your up to anything the least bit fishy with me, I'll toss you over and charbroil your ass faster than a fucking hiccup!  But as long as you keep out of my way, well I'll let you have your time in This match. #Deal?[/size]




[size=15]And Nobi, why have you been so quiet?  Where is this great prospect just itching to break thru and lay his hands on gold?  Where's the guy who has been busting his ass week in and week out on Showdown?  Are you stilled bummed that you fell flat on your face at the biggest show of the year?  Or are you still crying because while I defeated a former champion and hall of famer, you were sitting at home in he couch watching the Mark Michaels era of showdown kick off in grand fashion?!  Truth be told, I really couldn't give a shit where you are or what you're doing, you're pretty low on the list of guys who could challenge me in this match. And incase you don't hear to well maybe you should take a look back because I did call you out on not being a part of the first show of the new season.  And while you're at it take a good look at what happened last week because as you may have heard I kicked the shit out of both Nova and POP.  I got added to this match because unlike everyone else (besides Boetius) I won my matchup last week.  Run Nobi, don't show your ugly face anywhere near my ring, trust me you don't want to, not in the mood I'm in. Hide away in what ever shit shack you've got in that hell hole you call a country.[/size]

[size=15]But for argument’s sake let's just say you show up Saturday and try to weasel your way to my title match. Well to put it plain and simple, I’m gonna see to it that you end up at home every week because I will End you in Ogden if it means I get to face Stark. I will plant your fucking head into the concrete outside, and send you Directly to concussion city.  This isn't Dynasty, and the Mark Michaels who stood by patiently is dead and buried!  I am out to take what's mine, I am here to wipe away all the missed opportunities, and silence any bullshit about wasted potential or just being all talk. I am here on Showdown to plant my flag at the highest peak of this company, and let the world see once and for all that Mark Michaels is everything he has ever claimed to be.  This season is where my name is forever added to the record books. This brand is the one I'm taking over and using as a launching pad to top of the sport of Professional Wrestling as a whole!  So do yourself a favor Nobi, stay quiet, and stay as far out of my line of sight as possible. [/size]


[size=15]And that leaves just one more. my old pal from Dynasty,  Lucas Johnson. Didn't take you long to start yelling and ranting about how your  the biggest thing on Showdown, just like I said you would. You’re on Showdown for all of a week and you bitched and moaned until you somehow got thrown into this battle royal. Personally it makes me sick to my stomach, You know why?  Because it seems that every time, every single goddamn time I'm about to get what's coming to me, your fat ass always manages to somehow squeeze into my title matches. Well you know what  Johnson, this time we're not playing on your terms. Your not a champion who can duck me till a week before a pay per view to accept my challenge (after you sucker punch me from behind and toss in a chump so you can slink away with the title of course). We're not in Hell’s Warpath where I took the best shots from every rat bastard son of a bitch who walked thru the curtain, and you get to pick up scraps like the fucking dog you are. This time Lucas, it's a whole different story. This time I'm the one with the big win, at a big show, while your ass just suffered, what was it? The fourth loss in a row?  You're not the fucking man around here, and you don't have that hack Sebastian Monroe kissing your ass anymore!  So while you keep stuffing your fat head with all these fantasies about how your gonna go down to the developmental show and go on to be a double champion, I'm gonna place just about every ounce of my energy into tossing you over the top rope, and finally getting a 300 pound monkey off my back!  [/size]

[size=15]Face it Lucas, the bullshit facade you worked so hard to build up since Reckless Wiring, well it's done, over finished. People finally see that the great and powerful wizard of OZ, is just some fat ass behind a shit ton of smoke and mirrors. Get ready Lucas, because you and the rest of the bunch are about to see the genuine article. A true contender to the National Elite Championship. A man who people can be proud of when he has his hand raised high!  The man who is the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero to each and every Member of the EAW Universe. The man who will win this ring of fire battle royal, and send the dreams of all these pretenders to the throne up in smoke. [/size]

[size=15]The man who is without a doubt the single greatest professional athlete to ever lace a pair of boots, the brightest burning star this company will ever see, and the man who is saving the Showdown brand from mediocrity one match at a time. I am the absolute picture of perfection, and when the smoke clears, I'll be the number one contender to the National Elite Championship, so all you boy had better start Picturing THAT![/size]


[size=15]#EAW #Showdown #RingOfFireBattleRoyal.”[/size]




[size=15]55,000,000+ users like this[/size]

[size=15]Showdown Promo #2[/size]




[size=15]@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:[/size]


[size=15]“Well followers here I sit, just about ready to kick back and enjoy an amazing Independence Day that I have planned. A day where we celebrate our freedom from England, much like I am celebrating my freedom from Dynasty. Tomorrow people all across the nation will be sipping beers and eating BBQ, but for each and every one of my friends, followers, and subscribers across all of social media, they know that the real fireworks will happen this Saturday night, when in my Showdown debut, I blow the roof off the Dream Style Arena when I step out on the stage. The building will be packed to the rafters with my fans cheering and chanting my name, and when I have my hand raised after that final bell has rung, it'll be the most retweeted moment of the week. It'll be bigger than #Covfefe!  And with this win, We can officially kick off the Mark Michaels Era of Showdown. [/size]



[size=15]Now sure there are some haters out there who are trying to bring me down by talking a bunch of bullshit about how I've been thrown to the sharks, and I'm on the brand where I have to compete with the some of the best talents in EAW today just for a spot on the roster. Well to them I say, I more than welcome the challenge of hanging with guys like Lannister, and Tiberius Jo… the fourth. I do so because that first word in EAW is Elite. You have to be the best of the best, the top of the top just to be here, and I guarantee that come hell or high water, Each and everyone of these Michaels envy suffering sons of bitchs are going to recognize me as the absolute best that this company has ever seen. No one before me could ever compare to me, and no one ever will. This Saturday night marks the beginning of Showdown being an absolutely PERFECT show.[/size]


[size=15]Now despite my best intentions to make every Saturday night, must see. There are still a few jackasses who aren't getting with the program here. One of them just happens to be some dumb fuck whose been hitting the coke, molly, acid, and hypno told wayyyyyy too hard. That moron in a cowboy hat Ross Vegas… I mean Johnny Nova.  But now that I think of it, Johnny does seem like a cheep, poorly made imitation, or a ‘knock off’ if you will. He loud, and gaudy, and to the untrained eye, can pass as a quality product for about 30 seconds. But when you take a good look at how he preforms, and you put him to the test, you see him fall apart at the seams faster than fucking hiccup. [/size]


[size=15]I think that getting his ass handed to him week after week has finally gotten to ol’ Johnny. I mean I can barely make out half the shit this guy is taking, and whatever I can make out of that cockamamie voice he's putting on, it makes guys in the looney bin think what the fuck is wrong with that guy. Too sweet to be sour, how bout head too far up his ass with all the gimmicks. I mean the tacky 80s sunglasses, and I've already mentioned the stupid looking hat. It's like you're so desperate for someone, anyone, to notice you, that you're just throwing all the crap in your grandmother’s closet up against the wall and seeing what sticks. [/size]


[size=15]You wanna talk about Saturn and Venus?  Well call me an Astronaut, because this Saturday night my boot is gonna be planted square up Uranus!  [/size]

[size=15]Johnny, do yourself a favor and see a shrink. Maybe they can find something to help with this case of ADHA you've suddenly developed, and you can go from being this loud mouth jackass in bright colored tights who makes all these wild claims and spits random words out as fast as he can. To right back to being loud mouth jackass in dark colored tights who knew his fucking place on the food chain.  This Saturday night I'm gonna knock some sense back into your head, and after I plant your skull into the canvas maybe you'll start thinking clearly enough to never speak another ill word of your Social Media Champion. [/size]


[size=15]And POP, why so quiet?  Don't tell me your just gonna show up to get pinned and paid. (Well tbh you always were because there's not a snowflake’s chance in hell of you beating me.) if all you're coming down to Albuquerque to do is lay down on your back, and pass the torch the new leader of the showdown locker room, than by all mean do so. You'll be saving yourself the ass kicking that so many others in your position have gotten. I can't tell you how many of these ‘All Time Greats’ show up for two weeks, get their asses beat, and remembered why they called it a career in the first place. But you simply having the class and dignity to spare what little respect and nostalgia your career has left, well it takes a wise man to do so. [/size]

[size=15]But in case you start getting that funny itch, and try to screw around with me on Showdown, know that I will not hesitate to end you. In one single moment, I'll ship you back to early retirement. You test me in that ring, and you're gonna fail, because hall of famer or not, there's not a man, woman, or child, who is better than Perfect!  [/size]


[size=15] Come at me bro, I've taken the best shots from everyone from Tig Kelly, to Mister DeDeDe, to Zack Crash, and many more. And while most men wouldn't have the balls to keep coming back from the wars I've wrestled, the demolition derbies I've seen in a ring, I'm still right here. I'm still battling thru the best this company can offer me, I'm still just a Screen Cracker away from Championship gold. And I am not about to be shoved to the bottom of the barrel because some quitter saw his gig as a massage therapist who gives free happy endings wasn't paying his mortgage. No, I am about to add another name to the resume, another win over a man who couldn't see the future standing right in front of him. [/size]

[size=15]It's my time now in EAW. It's my season, year, millennium, it's my goddamn forever!  I am taking this brand by the goddamn throat, and it doesn't matter who likes it or not.  because I am the unquestioned, biggest thing to ever grace not just this brand, not just This company, but the entire sport of professional wrestling!  I have more likes on one of my Facebook post, than EAW has subscribers to the goddamn network!  I'm the brightest burning star, I'm Twitter Trendsetter, I'm instagram icon, I'm the fucking #Hero and each and every one in the back better start wising up!  [/size]

[size=15]I am hands down, the single greatest professional athlete to ever step between the ropes. And from the second that bell sounds, both Johnny Nova, and Prince Of Phenomenal, are going to be  torched in that goddamn ring. So both of you had better start getting to Picturing THAT! [/size]

[size=15]And Kaise, try not to screw up my debut, my followers hate it when Some jackass cost me a match. [/size]


[size=15]#EAW #Showdown #Saturday”[/size]




[size=15]52,000,000 users liked this. [/size]

[size=15]The 24/7 Battle Royal @ Pain For Pride, Promo #5 [/size]



[size=15]@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update: [/size]


[size=15]“Hours. We're officially so close to the biggest Event the world has ever seen, that we no longer even need to measure the time till in days.  We are getting down to crunch time here folks, and every single member of the roster is starting to feel it. From the top to the bottom, from the rookies to the seasoned veterans. Everyone is amped up and ready to be at their best this weekend for the show of shows, #PainForPrideX. And yours truly is no exception. I have been looking forward to this moment for the longest time now, and believe you me, I will make this a night to remember for all of you, when I toss the last of those poor saps who were unfortunate enough to be in the ring with me. [/size]

[size=15]And just like they have all week, they have been taking directly out of their asses with all this. Nonsense about how they're better than me,  or get this, that I'm the bottom of the barrel when it comes to talent. Boy, are each and everyone of these good for nothing bastards in for a surprise (even though they shouldn't be) when I kick the ever loving shit out of each and every one of them, and toss all of them right over the top rope.  But hey loo on the bright side, the sooner I'm done kicking all of your asses, the sooner you can go and catch a case of the herp from that $20 hooker you’ve had your eye on, but needed that Pain For Pride bonus to actually buy. [/size]


[size=15]Now Theron Nicolas. You talk about the roll you've been on. Like I've said before, your only on a roll because we haven't been in the ring together yet. And when we do at Pain For Pride, the only thing that's gonna roll about you, are your eyes to the back of your head after I bitch slap you upside it.  You go on and on about how you squashed a few low end talents. Mother fucker I've been in the ring with legendary talents, still in their prime. Men like DeDeDe, Impact, Crash.  I sent Scott Oasis running for the hills. And more importantly, I've sent countless big headed, overhyped shits like you into early retirement. I'm the biggest thing going for Dynasty right now (especially since Tig Kelly is MIA). Yet in the two years I've been here, I've had only a single one on one title match, which I happened to win by the way. Every day since I've been passed up in favor of the flavor of the month, or saddled with some douche bag so that Monroe’s hand picked champions had a way to retain without beating me.[/size]

[size=15]That is gonna change this weekend when I dump you and 32 others out on to the alongside all the rest of the trash in this god forsaken state. I am going to win this battle royal, and the cherry on top is getting to see your face, when this ‘failure’ has his hand raised for all the world to see. [/size]


[size=15]Hey did anyone hear Lethal Consequences?  What's a matter sport?  I know an old dog like you really doesn't have much to offer, but don't be so glum. You and the rest Senior Circuit gang are getting that Pain For Pride Payday.  You get one last moment in the sun, and you get to be a guy who passed the torch to the future of this business. You get to have a stadium filled with people cheer “Oh hey, that's that one guy, and he's here tonight.”   [/size]

[size=15]And most importantly you get to have that moment in the match that people around the world will have their eyes glued to. When I toss your old, has been ass over the top, do you know how many likes that picture is gonna get?  Millions to say the least. Eliminating you, well that is gonna open the door to even more followers on social media. And defeating another former  world champion, is only gonna solidify my place as the next face of EAW. [/size]

[size=15]Same thing goes for you Scott Diamond. You're already done taking? What is the early bird special at the old folks home on? Now I know at your age you have to conserve the small amount of strength you have left, but really scotty? You're done already?  You finished quicker than you did with your wife in bed last night. And everyone is about as unsatisfied. If this is what you become now a days, than the mercy killing I'm giving you at PainFor Pride can't come soon enough. [/size]

[size=15]Say anyone heard from Harvey York? Or Carson Ramsey? Or well half the guys in the goddamn match? No? And no one really cares what any of those empty headed fucks have to say anyways?  No, just checking. They're  all probably busy trying to come up with an excuse for when I beat the crap out of all of them. Either that, or they're all trying to figure out where's the best place to lie low until I've won the battle royal and it's safe to come out. [/size]


[size=15]Oh god, Redneck Ralph just opened his mouth and started  spewing out all his ultra patriotic horse shit. You know I was hoping since we're so close to Pain For Pride, that Cody would have just kept his dumb mouth shut. But much like Forrest Gump, stupid is as stupid does. Cody now that you've said your piece, why don't you leave the discussion about who's gonna win this battle royal to the people with I.Q.s over 50. [/size]


[size=15]And Jon McAdams maybe you should get a few facts straight. See first I was on the go home show for burning Desire, it was the show where Lucas Johnson finally stopped ducking me (and threw Anthony Leonhart into my New Breed Championship match).  Now yes you were the hardcore champion (for a week) and you did pin the champion to get it (though Carson Ramsey should get the credit).  But this Weekend, it's a whole different ball game. At Pain For Pride, I'm not gonna let some snot nosed bastard or his bromance stand between me, and that contract. I'm not gonna let the guy who ran and hid from that Solomon whatshisface, be the one who keeps me from laying hands on all I deserve. With one victory I am going to erase all the bullshit that held back in the past. With one cash in of that contract, I will cement and vindicate everything I've ever said about being the greatest professional wrestler alive. You call it nonsense, I call it a promise. And if you don't like it, you can go back to playing hide the sausage with your buddy Mike Showman. So Jon why don't you do everyone a big favor. Why don't pip pip, cherri oh, and fuck right he hell off before I break that cane of yours off in your ass[/size]


[size=15]Kaise, just what makes you, or any of the other guys who just signed a contract, think that any of you stand a chance of winning this battle royal?  Where does this thought come from (besides a crack pipe)? You may be ten steps ahead of every one Kaise, but that's because you're headed in the wrong direction. See instead of just flying under the radar and maybe stealing an Elimination or two. You've made yourself the most pompous ass in this match (and considering who’s in this one that's saying something). You mumble all this ‘the world will know who the fuck is Kaise Boetius’ and really we all kinda got it figured out already. He's a complete jackass who thinks he's more deceiving and devious than anyone in the history of EAW. He's a teeny tiny little man who thinks he's gonna box with a wrestling god and somehow not get his ass beaten all over MetLife Stadium!  You had one match where you beat a guy with a losing record. If you think I'm impressed, think again. Let's see how you, or anyone else who's been here less than a month fare in two weeks. Let's see how many of you are left. I've seen a million guys like you Kaise. Riddler, Gambit, Jaden Zaxira, the list goes on and on. You know who's cut them all?  Me!  You know who sent every one of their overhyped, underdeveloped asses back to doing spot shows at flea markets? Me!  You know who's the one who has what it takes to still be here when guys who the suits got enamored and the. Bored with drop like flys?  Me!  I'm the goddamn iron man of this company simply because I don't tuck my tail and run like every other son of a bitch who thought they were hot shit has. [/size]

[size=15]I'm here because I've had a goal since I was a six year old kid, to be a world champion. Last year Kaise, you weren't even a wrestler. I am here because I will grind and grind, and grind until I hold that world championship in my hand and snap it on to my waist! [/size]

[size=15]Everyone, from Jonny Nova, to Sheridan Muller better start getting with the goddamn program. I'm not coming to get a nostalgia pop from the crowd like Scott Diamond. I'm not coming to promote a brand of EAW like the hot Asian chicks who don't know when to shut up. I'm not coming to find my place on the roster like Teddy Hilfiger. No I am coming to snap up that contract, because when I do, championship gold is as good as mine. Mine! Do you fuckheads understand?!  I don't care if you're a hall of gamer, or a goddamn newbie, you stand in my way, and I will hurt you. It doesn't matter if your name is Darkane, or Prince of Phenomenal, you step to be and I will embarrass your ass in front of 80,000 people live, and millions more around the globe watching on TV.  [/size]

[size=15]You all should be taking a page from Tig Kelly and El Ironico, because they've been hiding out in some dumpy dive bar, afraid to step into the ring with Mark Michaels. They've done it before, and they sure as hell never want to do it again. So all of you zip your lips, shut the fuck up, and while your at it, bow down before the man who will stand head and shoulders a over each and every one of you jackasses. [/size]

[size=15]Show some respect to the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero that is gonna mow down you mother fuckers faster than a machine gun!  Get yourself good and ready to be dominated from bell to bell, by the man whose combination of speed, strength, technical skill, and ring savvy have earned him the title of Perfect!  It won't matter if your the model of German efficiency, or the man with the silver swing, or whatever the fuck ONI’s nickname is, because whatever you are, your not better than perfect. All of you better get ready, because your all about to be face to face with the biggest star that EAW Has ever seen. The man who will lead as the face of EAW, and without a single doubt go down as the unquestioned, undisputed,  single greatest professional athlete to ever step between the ropes! You all are about to see just what has earned me an army of followers from around the globe. You all are about stand in the ring across from the Social Media Champion of the world! You all are about to get an A-list ass kicking, courtesy of “Picture Perfect” Mark Michaels.  Pain For Pride, that contract is mine, so all of you better start Picturing THAT!  [/size]


[size=15]#PainForPrideX #Mr.24/7 #EAW #InTheBag”[/size]




[size=15]55,000,000+ users liked this. [/size]

[size=15]The 24/7 Battle Royal @ Pain For Pride, Promo #2[/size]


[size=15]@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a stays update:[/size]


[size=15]“Well my dear followers, I guess you could say the countdown is on. Now for some (such as myself) their has been a multitude of people, from every country, every city, every tribe who have been counting down the months, days, he'll they've been counting down the seconds till I step out thru the curtain, and make my grand entrance at #PainForPrideTen! [/size]

[size=15]Now we are less than a week away from this grand daddy of shows, and every member of the roster is feeling the excitement and anticipation build within them.  None more than your undisputed Social Media Champion, because when I walk out before the crowd at MetLife Stadium, and soak in that moment that has been long over due to me, I know that the thunderous ovation I receive from all my friends, followers, and subscribers will be one of the loudest on record for EAW.  Now it would be the loudest ever period, but that distinction will come a few moments later, after I'm done tossing the last pathetic peon over the top rope and down to the floor, and my hand gets raised in the most retweeted moment ever captured. [/size]

[size=15]And now as I sit back after an amazing day in the gym, to gift all of you across social media with a few minutes of me precious time, I have have to address several of the dick head dumbasses who think that just because they squabble endlessly like a bunch of goddamn chickens, that they stand a snowflake’s chance in hell against me in that ring. [/size]

[size=15]Take for instance some of the ‘competitors’ from empire (or anyone packing a Vajay in his match really). I'm typically used to women running their mouths about shot they know nothing about, just because they love the sound of their own voice. But my god, hearing them clucking on and on about how they think their actually gonna win is becoming more annoying than when you finally line up the perfect selfie, and some douchebag walks past you in the background. [/size]

[size=15]That's just about the perfect summary of you Azumi, your a bit player who should be sticking to staying in the background. Your the kid who got cast to play a tree in the school play out of pity more than anything else. You call yourself the Ace of Empire, well in this game the ace runs as low as you can get. Look honey you need to settle back down to reality and really reevaluate your situation at Pain For Pride, because while you keep spouting off this nonsense about that fills your head about being the best in the ring, you'll soon stand toe to toe with the guy who actually is. [/size]

[size=15]Now I know I shouldn't be surprised, but I just couldn't help but to be after hearing Sheridan Muller ramble on and on and on and on and on and on and on about all this German efficiency crap. And after listening to all of it (or at least as much of it as I could without falling asleep) It got me really pissed off. Not just because it's rhetoric that borders on lunac, not just that it's complete and utter bullcrap that she has no chance of backing up in the 24/7 battle royal. No what pissed me off about it was that she opened the door for that flag waving fuck Cody Marshall to start with all his ‘Merica crap which we’ll be hearing all goddamn week. Thanks a lot Sher, you turned what should have been a straightforward battle royal, into a pissing contest  over whose country could beat up the other’s country. How in the worlds did you manage to fuck up such a simple concept of throwing someone over the top rope, and turn it into one of your speeches about the positives of the third Reich?! Jesus Sheridan you need to chill out with the German bullshit. Hell look at me, I've transcended all borders and boundaries. Ive become a citizen of the world, thanks in no small part thanks to my theatrics ;-)[/size]

[size=15]Now I'm not saying that you possess the charisma, skill, or general likability to do so, but you could at least pull your German Head, out of your efficient ass, and start to face up the fact that when I beat you at Pain For Pride, I'll be doing it in style. [/size]


[size=15]Now I would talk about everything Haruna said about this match, but I'm sure she wouldn't understand anything I'd say. Poor thing is just gonna have to find out the hard way that she's not in the ring with just any chump, she is gonna share the ring with the single greatest professional athlete to ever step between the ropes. At Pain For Pride, there won't be a language barrier that Haruna is gonna have to deal with, no my actions will speak much louder than any words. This weekend, it's sayonara for Sakazaki. [/size]


[size=15]So now that I've dealt with that piece of business, let me talk about a of the other bastards I'm gonna have to beat senseless this weekend. [/size]

[size=15]Like for instance, Anthony Leonhart. I know I was shocked too that this low ceiling, piece of cannon fodder got tossed into this match. Now granted he doesn't have to pin anyone, or make them submit, so his odds of winning are slightly (barely) improved for this one. But let's face it, Leonhart has never beaten me before, and he sure as hell ain't gonna do it at the biggest show of the year. So what does it say about you Anthony when I can beat you with one hand tied behind my back ( or in this case taking a selfie)?  I'll tell you exactly what it means Anthony.  You are just another body, a number they can spout off about to make my eventual win that much bigger. [/size]

[size=15]It's the same reason the has beens are here. Scott Diamond, Leathal Consequences, and Ryan Savage. Allow me to address you more or less as a group.  Guys like you are only here to get that ‘oh I haven't seen him in a while pop’ that every wash up fuck craves like a junkie. And after they get their moment of ohs and awes, I am promptly going to see to it that they are gonna go right on ahead and fuck off somewhere besides my ring. Everyone and their mother knows that your fifteen minutes in the lime light ended years ago. This match is about the future. Future champion, future main eventer, future face of EAW. That future belongs to me. That future begins when my hand is raised high in victory. That future begins when I lay hands on that 24/7 contract. [/size]


[size=15]And let's not forget about the emos in the class. [/size]


[size=15]Darkane, part of me wants you to win this match. Not because I respect you, or fear you, or in general give two shits about you in any way, shape, or form. No, I want you to win because I don't want you to go all Cobaine after getting your ass handed to you, and then making the rest of the roster have to do tribute shows to such a peon piss stain. But after hearing you run your mouth for a bit, I'm pretty sure you wouldn't have the balls to do so, so I'll be more than happy to kick your ass up and down MetLife Stadium. So this weekend, take a moment to soak in the atmosphere, and really enjoy the fact that you'll be standing across the ring with the biggest star that EAW has ever seen. Really just take it in, because before you know it, I'm gonna send your ass sailing over the top, and Down to the floor. The. You can go back to whatever the hell it is you do when your not just a mild pain in my ass.  Like working the fryer at. McDonald’s. [/size]



[size=15]And ONI, I must admit you been on a roll recently. Getting a few main event wins on your C show brand. But overall I'm not impressed. Not by your fluke victories, not by your odd clinginess to your grand father, and certainly not to your bullshit little freak show club (except for that one guy who screams a lot, something about fire. That guy gives me the creeps). Let's make it certain right here ONI that whatever dreams you had about winning this battle royal, and going on to add championship gold to your resume, its already been thrown out the window, because there is not a man in the match that is hungrier than I am to get this win.  There isn't a soul alive who needs that contract more than I do, because I am too damn good, and have worked too damn long and hard, just for some looney headed fuck like you take away what is rightfully mine!  You Sanitorium shit heads talk about inflicting pain, your gonna find out first hand that no one can dish it more that Mark Michaels when he is as desperate to win as he is right now. [/size]


[size=15]And all you newbies out there, stay out of my way and I might be nice enough to allow you walk out of Pain For Pride without any career ending injuries. [/size]


[size=15]At Pain For Pride, I am promising each and every one of you that you are gonna see Mark Michaels like you've never seen him before. You are going to see a man who's is fixing to let out two years of frustration of being jerked around, and screwed over time after time after time. You are about to see a man who's not just gonna be like a house of fire, no he's gonna be a fucking towering inferno that will absolutely torch every one of you overhyped, underdeveloped dicks. You are going to see exactly what has earned me an army of friends, followers, and subscribers from every corner of the globe. You will see the twitter Trend Setter, the Instagram Icon, and fucking #Hero who is gonna run over every one of you like a bulldozer. You are gonna see the speed, strength, technical skill, and unmatched charisma that has made me the brightest star that has ever shined. You will see the drive and motivation that has made me the single greatest professional wrestler to ever lace up a pair of boots. And by god after I am done tossing the very last of you over the top, you will no beyond the shadow of a doubt, that I am the unquestioned picture of perfection!  [/size]

[size=15]Get ready boys and girls because the next MR.24/7 is coming to fight, so you had better listen up and start Picturing THAT![/size]


[size=15]#PainForPride #EAW #24/7 #365”[/size]





[size=15]54,000,000 users liked this. [/size]

Burning Desire Promo #5


@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:


"You know I was gonna call it a night and get an early start tomorrow, but than some big, dumb, oafish looking mother fucker decided to talk his stupid fucking mouth off, and get me pissed. Now before I discuss said shrek looking asshat, I want to say something really quick to the other guy who has just been a pest to deal with all week. You know the pissant prick who fumble fucked his way to the chance of a lifetime. Anthony Leonhart, you know better than to speak when men are taking. So why don't you gather up your mangina, and head off to bed before I have to rip you to shreds like I'm about with this jackass Johnson.


Gee Lucas, you sure got a lot to say about my millions upon millions of friends, followers, and subscribers, who have made me quite a pretty penny. not that I need to tell anybody, because one look at me tells you everything you need to know about me. much in same way it does about. Oh BTW I can see the the Goodwill tag hanging off that 'expensive suit' you keep running your mouth about.

I'm not asking anyone to shed a single tear over everything I've been through in the past year plus. No, what I am doing is warning you and Anthony that you yourselves will probably balling your eyes out after I plant my boot so far up both your asses that I'll be using you as a pair of slippers.

You want to run your mouth about how you are the best wrester on the planet, we'll see how true that rings once the dust settles this Friday. We'll see exactly who is the New Breed Champion, and who's left staring up at the lights.

You see I'm not this 'New and improved' version of myself, no I still am what I have always claimed to be, PERFECT. You get that Luke? Does that tiny pea sized brain of yours, that rattles around in that fat, swollen head that sits on your shoulders, comprehend everything I'm saying to you? Or do I have to dumb it down for you liked they used to in special ed class?


You want to rail against all of my followers, but why don't you take a moment to stop and think about why they follow me? If that's too hard for you to figure out ( and judging from what I just said it is) than allow me to spell it out for you. See all the people who devote every single moment of their free time to seeing where I go, and who I'm with, and How I go about my way of doing it, they follow me because they have seen that in the ring I am the total package. I have everything you could ever want from a professional wrestler. I have the look, the skill, the charisma, and most importantly, I have the undeniable drive and determination to make sure that At Burning Desire, I will finally capture that New Breed Championship.


Now I see that you still have enough functioning brain cells to recognize me as an amazing talent, but when you say that I'm not every bit as good as you are, well I guess you got me there because I'm not... I'M BETTER! How much better? You'll find out in about 24 hours from now. Hopefully in that time you won't repeat the exact same things I just said like you did with the whole fifteen minutes being up thing. Lucas just try to understand that When I plant your fucking head in the mat, and the referee counts one, two, three, there won't be a doubt between you, me, and every single person who'll be packing the Barclay Center!

You want to try and end my career? Come at me bro, Take your best goddamn shot, because I promise you that just when you think everything is in the palm of your hand, WHAM! Your face is gonna get stuffed with my knee via a Screen Cracker #OuttaNowhere!

Go on and cling to the advice that Scott Oasis gave you, I'm sure you'll fare about as well as he did when he got booked against me (for the record he ran like a little bitch and I won in less than a minute). Keep

Do yourself a goddamn favor and shut your fucking mouth up before you stir me up even more, and I simply kick your ass right whenever and wherever you're standing. Because my patience with you has reached its breaking point, I simply cannot tolerate listing to you mentioning my name when you spew all that dumb shit out of your mouth. Why don't you go on and talk about Leonhart some more? Nobody likes that French fuck anyways (he's still French right? Like he didn't t suddenly become not French? How could he even do something like that?). Or better yet Lucas, why don't you just try shutting the fuck up and spare us all from having to listen to your mongoloid sounding voice again.



Do so and maybe, just maybe, I'll leave enough of you to make it to Pain For Pride. You know what that is Right Lucas? Is the biggest show of the year. It's where the absolute best (such as myself) come to prove themselves worthy of being immortalized forever as legends of this industry. It is the grandest stage where the greatest stand and cement their legacies. This year will see Mark Michaels make his Pain For Pride debut in what is sure to go down as the greatest moment in Pain For Pride history!


This is the beginning of a glorious golden age in Professional Wrestling, one that shall be the envy of every other era to follow it. This is the beginning ofThe Mark Michaels Era here in EAW, and with the biggest event in company history fast approaching, I couldn't think of a better way for it to kick off, than with a victory to claim the Elite Answers Wrestling New Breed Championship. This is my time now, and there is not a damn thing that anybody can do to stop it.

Because I am the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero to millions from every Corner of the globe. The man who will do the impossible and shut up Lucas Johnson's trap once and for all! The man who will dominate The dominator, the man who will tame the roaring Lion (again), the man who will stand before a sell out crowd at the Barclay Center and proudly have his hand raised as the New Breed Championship belt is wrapped perfectly around my waist. The man who is the destiny of Dynasty, the future face of the industry, the man who is the brightest burning star that Burning Desire will see this Friday. The man who is without the tiniest shred of a doubt, the unquestioned greatest professional athlete to ever lace a pair of boots!


And after the dust settles on this triple threat match, the man who will lead the next generation as the New Breed Champion, the absolute picture perfection Mark Michaels! And wether you like it or not, you had better start Picturing THAT! #BurningDesire #EAW Dynasty"


48,000,000 users liked this.


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Burning Desire #2



@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:

"Just landed here at JFK, and the moment the wheels touched down I felt a tingling sensation running up and down my spine. Because the moment the plane landed I knew that countdown was officially on, and that my time to finally capture gold here in EAW was now. Now time to shut the mouths of every head in the sand hater like Lucas Johnson and Anthony Leonhart. Now is the time to stick it to every last doubter who said that I would never be more than a preliminary match player. Now is the time to cement my name in the record books of not only a of this company, but of the entire sport of Professional Wrestling. I was born to do great things, and this Friday night will be a preview of things to come. When it is all said and done I will go down as the greatest competitor to ever step in the ring. Titles wins, five star classic matches, leaving a lasting legacy and impact upon the entire industry, that is what you can expect from me. The start of a new golden age in professional wrestling begins the moment my hand is raised at Burning Desire and I am crowned the Elite Answers Wrestling New Breed Champion.

And to me, no better way to kick that golden age off than with that New Breed title. Because even though it has been marred by being passed off from one mediocre talent to the next (especially in the case of our current so called Champion), that belt is the symbol for those who will lead the way in within the next generation of top guys here in EAW. It has been the Championship that has brought national awareness to men like CM Banks, Devan Dubian, Brian Daniels, and even TLA. This title is one that should be celebrated and cherished, because to hold it is a sign that you are a legend in the making. Instead because of men like JJ Silva, Maxwell Dacsh, and our dear Lucas Johnson, and this once gleaming torch that lights the way for the future of this company, has died down and dimmed to just the faintest of embers. But that will all change after Burning Desire, because once that title is placed around the waist of the brightest burning star, the New Breed Championship shall shine like never before. I am coming to restore pride to that title by being a champion who is actually deserving to hold it. I am here to uplift it from the gutter of the B minus bastards who have soiled it with their grubby hands. I am coming to save the New Breed Championship!


And to do so I am gonna have to kick the ever loving shit out of two of Dynasty's biggest jackasses.


First off we have the roaring pussycat Anthony Leonhart (you know, the guy who is outclassed and has no business being in this match). Don't ask me how the hell this dumb fuck tripped over his own feet and fell into a title match, don't ask me how after getting his ass handed to him by both myself and Lucas Johnson he somehow wound up back in the ring with both of us, he'll don't even ask me if he'll bother to speak coherently this time around. I can't answer a damn question about Anthony Leonhart save for one thing, he is gonna walk into the Barclay Center having lost his last match to Mark Michaels, and he's gonna walk out the exact same way.

You know it really is something the way that Anthony went into the world for months to better himself both professionally and personally. How he studied in some of the finest dojos, under some of the best teachers in all of Japan, and at the end of the day it did all of jack shit for him. In fact if anything he's worst than when he left because now he's duped some of the lower I.Q.s in the crowd into expecting a modicum of excellence out of him. It takes more than a quick make over and a copy of samurai speak for dummies to achieve true excellence. It takes a lifetime of dedication to a craft, and years of hard work to earn the right to challenge for Championship gold. Anthony you simply can't compare to me. You are to short to measure up to the best professional athlete across the board. You don't have snowflake's chance in hell of getting the better of me, because there is absolutely nothing better than perfect.

It might be hard to swallow, but it's better to accept the fact that I'm gonna beat your ass quicker than last time. I'm doing so for your own good. I'm doing this so that you'll learn your proper place in the food chain here in EAW. You might think you're the king of the jungle, but right now you are dealing with the big game hunter who is gonna mount your head on his wall. Get those pipe dreams of you becoming the New Breed Champion out of your head right now, because there is no way that I will allow either you or Lucas to walk out the Barclay Center with what should rightfully belong to me. I am the future of this company no ifs, ands, or buts about it. You, you won't even be a footnote in the ultimate history of EAW. So now that I've told you exactly what's gonna happen this Friday (kinda like how I told you what would happen last Friday) go ahead and soak up all the glitz and glamor that you can, because once I hit that screen Cracker, it's all going bye-bye for you pal #sayonaraShithead.

And now that I've analyzed Anthony, that just leaves that bloated, cream puff looking mother fucker who has my belt.

You know something talk a lot about guys who are overrated, but there is not a man in EAW today who is more so than Lucas Johnson. You know everyone likes to talk about how Lucas has dominated... well the fleas of EAW when you look at it realistically. He's beaten low ceiling talent such as Chris Paradise and our own Anthony Leonhart, but when it comes to true top tier talent, he simply can't cut it. I mean take for example the fact that he lost to Scott Oasis just a few weeks ago. I myself on the other hand beat Scotty in less than a minute #Fact.

Maybe that's why this supposed NCAA Badass lost all his balls when it came to accepting my challenge. Maybe that's why he couldn't look me in the eye when I came out and stared him down a few weeks ago. And maybe it's why he waited till the last minute and had to blindside me before agreeing to put up that belt. When it comes down to it everything I've seen out of Lucas this past two months plus screams that he fears Mark Michaels.

That's right Luke, we all know it already that you start shaking in your boots the moment you hear that you might have to step into the ring with me again. You know that no one ever gets one over on Mark Michaels and doesn't get the ass kicking of a lifetime the next go around. I'm about to send you right back to that lower mid-card hell you were stuck in before picking up the biggest fluke win the world has ever seen.

I am fixing to expose you for the fraud you are Lucas, because we both know you're not a conqueror, we both know you're not a bad ass who takes on all comers, and we both know that come hell or high water there is not a goddamn thing that can stop me from planting your skull into the mat with a Picture Perfect. Come at me bro, and I'll be more than happy to show you that he moment you think everything is going your way, is the exact same moment my knee hits your face and leaves you laid out and staring at the lights! In the blink of an eye you go from being on top of the world, to being on the bottom of my boot while I'm standing over your unconscious body taking a selfie.

There is a saying in Brooklyn, Unity Makes Strength, and with over 18,000 of my friends, followers, and subscribers packing filling the Barclay Center, you will be going toe to toe, face to face with the strongest man in EAW. Test me Lucas, and you'll see first hand that I possess the Perfect combination of speed, strength, and technique, all wrapped together by months of frustration at having been jerked around when it came time to get a title match. Months of being passed along in favors of your dumb ass getting kicked over and over again simply because Sebastian Monroe must have gotten a good laugh every time he saw you bouncing off the canvas. Months of having to wait behind pathetic putzes who must have gotten down on their knees and blown of Monroe's yes men in New Jersey. This Friday I am coming at you like a raging inferno, they call this one Burning Desire, well I have the greatest desire to become the New Breed Champion, so I guess that means your ass is gonna get burned in that ring.

But look on the bright side, when your old and grey you can tell your grandchildren all about how you got your ass handed to you by THE Mark Michaels.


Burning Desire, you two assholes are gonna find out just why I am the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero millions upon millions around the world who recognize me for all my absolute Perfection. You boys are in for the fight of your lives because I am the Destiny of Dynasty, the Brightest burning star in EAW, the future face of this company, and hands down the single greatest professional athlete to ever lace up a pair of boots. This Friday I am going to stand tall over both of you halfwit hacks, while I raise that New Breed Championship over my head. You boys are about to become famous because my victory will be the most shared, retweeted, and liked moment on the face of the earth! Anthony, Lucas, both of you had better start Picturing THAT!


#EAW #Dynasty #BurningDesire #Friday"


46,000,000+ users liked this.



FADE TO BLACK

Dynasty promo #2


@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:

"Well here we are again, another week gone by and another no name chump whose the equivalent of a piece of dog dung that I have to scrape off the bottom of my shoe. Gambit sure has been quite this week, maybe it's because he's knows he's about to get torched from bell to bell in just a few short minutes? Who am I kidding? Of course that's the reason why. And it's for good reason, because I am gonna tear right thru that son of a bitch like a hot knife thru butter. I can't wait for this match to start, because as soon as it does it'll be over.

Once that bell rings, I am gonna run over that crackhead cowboy like a fright train. And once I'm done with him, I'll be on to much bigger things (literally when you consider the size of Lucas Johnson's fat ass). That right Luke, one way or another I'll be seeing you real soon.

Because with Burning Desire the next major stop on the road to Pain For Pride, you better believe that I am looking to punch my ticket straight to MetLife Stadium. So my dear friends, followers, and subscribers, keep your eyes peeled, because I promise you that big things are coming.

This is the time of year when legends are born, this is the season when history is made, and this is when the all time greats etch their names in immortality with heart stopping performances and amazing victories. This is Pain For Pride season, and I have been waiting for this for what has seemed like an eternity now. I am anxiously awaiting to my make grand entrance at the biggest event the world has ever seen.

I'll say it right now, she I make my Pain For Pride debut the world will never forget it #Promise


But for right now, I am gonna go out tonight and in front of this sold out crowd of my followers here at the Mississippi Coast Coliseum, and beat the three brain cells Gambit has left, out of his otherwise empty head. And hopefully after I plant his fucking skull into the mat with a Picture Perfect, Sebastian Monroe will start to wise up and hand me real competition (a term I use for a lack of a better word because there is not a man alive who could ever compare to me).

Now I would go on, but I can hear them queuing up my music, so get ready Biloxi, because you are about to be graced with the presence of the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero to millions upon millions from each and every corner of the globe. The man who with his combination of speed, strength, and technique has proven him self to the absolute picture of perfection. The undisputed Social Media Champion and hands down the single greatest professional athlete to ever step into the ring. So Gambit, and anyone else who might be listening, go on a picture That.

#EAW #Dynasty"


43,000,000 + users liked this.

FADE TO BLACK.

Dynasty Promo #3


@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:


"You know something followers, as I sit here moments away from making my triumphal entry on the stage here on Dynasty. I have a moment to reflect on everything that has brought me to this moment. From the first Social Media site I signed up with, to the first time I worked out with Don Hibson, to seeing my first wrestling match on television that fateful Saturday morning, to one of my earliest memories. One where I heard someone say the words 'L'Etoile du Nord'. I remember asking my father what those funny words meant, he told me that it meant the star of the north. The motto of Minnesota ended up being a sort of prophetic word, because here I stand now today as not just the star of the north, but of the east, west, south, and every space in between. I have become the biggest thing to hit since... well since ever. I have become a crossover superstar that commands an army of followers on social media. I am the most popular superstar on Dynasty, the one who sells the boat loads of tickets and merchandise that keep this overbloated brand out of the red. I don't need to hide my identity, because as I've said time and again I have nothing to hide. You hear my Smiles, not a goddamn thing.

Every Friday night I step into the ring and make this company money hand over fist. Enough to keep bottom feeder talents like you with food on the table. But if you want to keep acting like an ungrateful bastard, that's fine. I'll do to you what I do to each and every other gimmick loving freak whose ever crossed my path. See I've told you already about how I've gone toe to toe with guys like Mr.DeDeDe and Y2Impact, but in your case Smiles I feel like I should talk about the other side of the coin. Like for instance remember RedRum the clown? Of course you don't because in his first match in the company I kicked his ass back to the side show tent. Or perhaps you might recall The Riddler, you know the guy who just a month ago everyone was wetting their panties over because he was dark and mysterious and spoke about his struggles or whatever. One screen cracker sent him back to whatever hole he crawled out of. He came in one week, got a shot at the new Breed Championship that he didn't earn, and Mark Michaels kicked his overrated ass right out of EAW (sounds kinda familiar doesn't it). See every time one of you goofy, gimmick guys act like you're the biggest thing since sliced bread, I right here to remind you that there's a big difference between the shit, and just being shitty.

See while you like to act like you're the only one who ever worked in bingo halls and swap meets, I'd like to remind you that there is a mega mart worth of guys just like you who I chew up and spit out faster than a fucking machine gun! You're nothing special Target, you're just another bargain bin gimmick whose head gets a little too big from his flavor of the month pop. But the sad thing with you is that while the other no names I've kicked to the curb at least were able to make something of splash (no matter how small it actually was) you Smiles, you aren't even a fucking blip on the goddamn radar. Believe you me pal, the only reason anybody half remembers your name, is because you have shared the ring with the single greatest professional athlete to ever step between the ropes.

Target, you sad, strange, Michaels envy suffering son of a bitch, You say I only put up the highlights on my social media post, well in a way your correct because my entire life is a highlight reel. From the moment I open my eyes, till I settle in for the night, every single solitary moment is must watch when it's me! That is why I deserve to be placed on those billboards and tv ads. I know what I am worth, and that is exactly why it pisses my right the fuck off that I'm being saddled with you Target. I deserve to be in the ring with the best of the best, it's the exactly reason I signed with EAW in the first place. Instead my talents are being squandered in a throw away squash match with some joker who no one will remember when he's gone.


You talked about it how you worked in shit holes with no A/C, well get ready because once I'm thru with you, those buildings will seem like Madison Square Garden compared to the places you'll have to take bookings at just to pay the light bill.

Target get ready, because you are in for an A-List ass kicking. One that you'll be feeling for weeks. I am about to smack you upside the head and send that mask of yours into the third row. I am fixing to walk out to that ring, in front of every last one of the doubters who said I'd never amount to anything in this business, and show them exactly how my combination of speed, strength, technique, and charisma, have earned me the title of Perfection incarnate. So Target why don't you just sit back, relax, and enjoy your first class seat on the end of my boot all the way across Lake Superior!

After I am done with you tonight Target, there won't be a single doubt in anyone's mind as to why I am the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero to millions upon millions of followers from St. Paul to St. Ives. Followers who recognize my greatness. Followers who know that I am the future face of not just Elite Answers Wrestling, but of this great sport that I have dedicated my life to. They know that I am the the brightest burning star that this company will ever know, and thats it's all because I am hands down the single greatest professional wrestler to lace up a pair of boots. That is why I command this army of friends, followers, and subscribers, my skills in the ring have translated to me becoming their undisputed Social Media Champion. I am the unquestioned picture of perfection, and with Pain For Pride just over the horizon, I am going to prove to every last one of you head in the sand haters that there is no such thing as being better than Perfect! Target, you're gonna learn that lesson well in just a few minutes, so while you can go ahead and Picture THAT! #Dynasty #EAW #PicturePerfectHomecoming"


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Dynasty Promo #1


@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:

"You know something, there's a reason why I hate matches like the Grand Rampage. That's right I hate these random entry battle royals where the only way to win is to stay in the ring, that's all. How does that make for a worthy challenger for world champion at the biggest event of the year? Everyone and their mother is going on and on a about how the Pizza Boy showed so much heart and determination and passion, all the while forgetting that I hit him with the Screen Cracker and dropped him on his ass! Had this been any other match (or at least any match where the objective is to beat your opponent) nobody would be giving a shit about that dough baking bastard. One. Two. Three. There is not a single shred of doubt in my mind it would have happened had this been an actual wrestling match. Instead I got denied my destiny by some jackass from Jersey whose image at the top when you google choke artist. That blind squirrel may have stumbled onto a nut at Grand Rampage when he sucker punched me on the apron, but like always he fell short of even the smallest of goals, when he got tossed out on his ass.

So now as My driver is delivering me to the airport, I am leaving all the bull crap that occurred in the Grand Rampage match in Barcelona, and I turn my gaze towards the U.S., and the future. The very near future to be specific, because the countdown is on, and Pain For Pride just keeps getting closer and closer, but before we get there, we have a few stops to make, like for instance The Burning Desire supershow, or sooner than that the Grand Rampage fallout show for Dynasty. And between the shocking returns, and results that we all just saw and tweeted about, this Friday night will be one that is sure to be the one that sets the tone as we ride along the road to Pain for Pride.


Now that road is long and hard and there are many who cannot walk it, one such individual is man by the name of Mongoose McQueen. Now everybody reading this knows I've made no bones about how disgusted I was that this man was essentially handed a golden opportunity for LOSING his match against TLA just a few weeks ago. And I think the world saw just why I was when he was one of the first 5-6 guys eliminated in the match. That's the problem with handing out chances like this to bums like him, they always end up being squandered on a pathetic peon who doesn't appreciate it because he didn't have to work to get it. And now after the smoke has cleared and the dust has settled and Grand Rampage is in the rear view mirror, we see just how much of a worm Moonjuice or whatever the hell he calls himself actually is. In a matter of a day he's gone from a man who though he could conquer the world, to a mopey little bitch who can't even be lift his head up long enough to do his own whining.


But what can you expect from a man like McQueer, he has been handed opportunities for nothing since the day he walked in thru the door. And each and every time he's been in a position to be handed the world on a sliver platter, he has managed to stumble over his own feet and fall flat on his face. And yet here he is again being handed another opportunity that most men would give their right arms for, he has been handed the opportunity to face the single most popular athlete in EAW today, live on worldwide television.

Me, the man who has stood toe to toe with hall of famers like Zack Crash, Methuselah, And Y2Impact. The man who took their best shots and came back for more. The Man who wrestled circles around them.

And Has he earned it? Of course not. But for some reason Sebastian Monroe keeps throwing life vests at the talent that can't swim in the ocean we call Dynasty. He does this in spite of seeing how well it worked with Lucian Black. He does this because he thinks that a lowlife like McQueen can hold the weight of this brand on his shoulders. Let me ask something, how can a man uphold the standards of a major brand, when he has no standards himself? When there is nothing about him that reaches to be tossed in with the lowest of talent on the Dynasty roster? Moon... you know what, it's easier to just call him asshole.


So asshole over there, he's nothing more than a D minus player that is getting handed more money, more marquee match ups, and more title shots, than the man whose followers across all social media have made this brand a ratings juggernaut. Where is my reward just for showing up? Where is the title opportunities without having to slog thru a dozen Michaels envy suffering jackasses? Where is the heaping mountains of praise for knocking TLA upside the head Pele style? Why is it that chumps get all the main events, while I'm stuck with mid card for life losers like Finnegan Wakefield and Momfuck McDouchbag. Well I will be damned if I allow this trend to continue. I will no longer allow the mediocre talent to pass up the greatest professional athlete to ever grace step into a wrestling ring. This Friday night, I am going to give Moonshine McQueen a bigger ass kicking than the Green Bay Packers give the Chicago Bears.

I am more than pissed at how often I've been overlooked in favor for the flavor of the month. I'm sick of getting held back behind the riddlers, Lucas Johnsons, and Goonmoose McFuckfaces of the world, and I amfixing to put an end to all the overrated, overhyped, underdeveloped, rat bastard, sons of bitches, who think that they can waltz in and steal my spotlight, and not get a right proper A-list ass whipping courtesy of the future face of not just this company, but the entire industry. I'm going to cut thru every last one of these small time schlubs like a hot knife thru butter. Maybe then some of those stiffs back at EAW headquarters will recognize me for everything I am, and if they don't, then I'll just have to send every last unfortunate bastard in the back straight to the injured reserve list till they do.


I am making it my mission to rise up above each and every piece of the dead weight I've been chained to, starting with McNugget this week on Dynasty. And as I make my way towards Pain For Pride, I'll be using every head I plant into the mat with a picture perfect as a stepping stone. There will be nothing, and nobody who can stop me from attaining every last ounce of greatness and glory that I am due, and I will receive it all of it at the biggest show of the year.

I promise that by Pain For Pride, I will make sure that each and every last jackass from the locker room to the board room knows exactly why I am the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram icon, the #Hero to millions upon millions of followers the whole world round. And these followers recognize that I alone possess the Perfect combination of speed, strength, and technical prowess. My followers aren't like these head in the sand haters who try to deny that I am everything I claim to be. Those haters better start preparing for the Mark Michaels era of EAW because there is not a man in that locker room, not a single solidarity one, who can ever claim to be better than Perfect.
and what an era it will be. When I am crowned the face of EAW, when I am the embodiment of this company, this sport that I have devoted my life to, will see higher hights and greater gains, truly it will be the perfect era. And it will all be courtesy of the brightest burning star EAW will ever know. The single greatest professional athlete to ever lace up a pair of boots and step into the ring. The man who is the unquestioned Destiny of Dynasty, and most importantly the man who will be blazing a golden path to Pain For Pride, so GoneNoose (or whatever the fuck his name is) better start bucking up, wiping up his tears, and Picturing THAT! #EAW #Dynasty."


43,000,000 users liked this.

Reckless Wiring promo #5

@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:


"After what has felt like the longest week in my life, here I am inside the locker room in the Tokyo Dome finally about to take my rightful place as a champion here in EAW. At this very moment I can tell you that every one of my senses are turned up to 11, my heart is pounding, my focus is laser like, and all because The journey that I started nearly two years, two long years ago, I am now finally about to reach the first major milestone. The first accomplishment as a testament to all the miles on the road, all the time in the gym, and the years of striving to reach this very moment. I want to take a moment right now to thank you my followers for voting for me, and assisting me in achieving my destiny. Thank you for recognizing that My unparalleled excellence, my unmatched ability, and my unequaled determination in achieving all the I have been dreaming about since that one faithful Saturday morning when I was six years old.

Thank you for having the foresight to recognize the only man who is capable of carrying not just EAW, but the entire Professional Wrestling industry on his shoulders in the years to come. Only I, your Undisputed Social Media Champion, has the tools necessary to ensure the health and prosperity of this industry for the next generation. Unlike these good for nothing jackasses who think they can step in the ring with me, and not get absolutely torched bell to bell, only he who is the unquestioned Picture of Perfection has brings the mix of speed, strength, and technical ability that propels me past the five unfortunate schlubs who don't stand a snowflake's chance in hell of getting their hand raised tonight!

Yes it's true that every man in this match just chomping at the bit for their chance to go down in the history books tonight. And yes everyone and their momma have listed the reasons why they could be and should be the New Breed Champion, but Tonight we are separate the fact from the crap. The truth from the tall tales. Tonight In hell's Warpath, we find out exactly who can back up everything they've had to say this past week, and just who has been taking out of their ass! Everyone inside this hallowed arena is gonna find out just who is willing to push themselves The furthest, who has been working the hardest, and Who is willing to do whatever it takes to put that belt around their waist. Who is willing to bash someone upside the head with lead pipe, and shatter their ankle between a steel chair, or send them crashing thru a flaming table. And more importantly who is willing to get back up and keep on fighting after all that has been done to them! That's the real key to this Hell's Warpath match, it's not just about being the most sadistic bastard in that ring, it's about taking his best shot and the. Getting right back up to look him in the eye and say to him 'Is that all you got?!', this match is about endurance, it's about having the hearth to go that one more round. And there is not a single member of the roster, regardless of brand, that can match me In terms of ability to withstand all the punishment that comes with being in a match like this, and still find the way to pull out a victory.

It's my ability to tough it out that has made me the only man who can say that he has competed in every Hell's Warpath match to date. Don't believe me, just look around, the nine men who stepped in to this match last year, they had more than their fill, just like these the schmucks who are gonna feel the same way after tonight. Let me say it now, out of the six men who are about to risk their careers, and even their well being, only one of these men can stand the test of time. Only one man will stand head and shoulders above the rest when the ultimate history of Professional wrestling has been written. That man is the same one who has cultivated an army of followers from each and every corner of the globe. The man who has become a must see sensation. That man is Mark Michaels.

You got that boys?! Have you gotten it thru your thick skulls that not a one of you jokers can match the energy and effort that I put out each and every week. Not a one of you take time to promote this company the way that I do, and not one of would be worthy of representing this company.

That's right because there's more to being a champion that just sitting on your ass and collecting a nice little pay day. No you have to be the man who can take the ball and run with it for as long as you possibly can. That's why a chump like Lucas Johnson can't be the New Breed Champion, because for all the whining and complaining, and bitching, and moaning he's been doing for months on end, the one thing he has yet to do is actually back up a single word that has passed thru his double chin. Young Lion's cup this, pain for pride that, we've heard it all before Luke, and we've were sick of hearing it after the first time. You say people look at you like you're a joke, that's because you are. You go on and on about how you were one of the top amateurs in college, well guess what? It a whole different level of competition as a professional. You are about to step in the ring with men who have spent their lives working to get to this level, not boys who are worried about an algebra test in the morning. You are dealing with men who have chosen to make their living from this great sport, not kids who want to get a certificate in Theater Arts. It's time to grow up a bit Lucas and let go of the glory days, because hanging on to them isn't doing you a damn bit of good right now. Snap back to reality and see that while you were a big fish in a small pond in your NCAA days, right now you're nothing more than a helpless little guppy who's about to be swallowed by a shark. Face facts, you peaked in high school bro, and now you have to stand against the absolute best this business has to offer in this, or any generation. You are about to go toe to toe with Professional Wrestling's hottest commodity and top prospect. The number one draft pick is about to get the first of many title reigns, and honestly Lucas, you should feel honored because you're gonna get the best seat in the house of when I do so.

And where is Jacob Moore? I haven't heard a peep out of him this whole week. Maybe he's busy looking for his balls back in Sebastian Monroe's office. Or maybe that stiff in a cheep suit forgot to take the ball gag out of Jacob's mouth? In either case it really doesn't matter to me, I'll dispatch of Jacob just the same as if he was to run his mouth. You see I don't like when someone is placed between me and the title that I am so deserving of. Especially when said someone is only there because he got down on his knees and kissed the boss' ass so hard he could see what he had for dinner last night. So when someone who is such an unfiltered suck up enters my ring, I take it a a personal mission to make sure I plant his skull into the mat with a picture perfect. So why don't you do yourself a favor and skip this match the way you've skipped everything else in the past week And Jacob, if you do somehow find enough manhood to step between the ropes, just know that when I send you on a one way trip on the end of my boot, it's not just business it's personal.

Now while I'm on the subject of cowards who think that if they keep quiet, I won't proceed to dish out the most embarrassing ass whipping they'll ever receive. El Ironico you wondered if you deserved to be a part of this match, I can tell you right now you sure as hell don't. You're nothing more than a pathetic waste of space. Hell your a waste of perfectly good oxygen. Nothing about you says that you're an exceptional talent. Why you couldn't even beat Jacob Moore a few weeks back. You manage to pin the bottom of the barrel that we call Lucas Johnson, and for somehow you got voted into this hell's Warpath match. I tell you, the people must be wanting to see you get trounced by the Social Media Champion. I can't wait for you to make your way down to the ring so I can smack that silly looking mask off your face. Maybe the. The circulation might return to your brain, and your words will actually make sense. You think I'm scared of you? I gotta ask what have you been smoking? The only thing scary about you is what might happen on the off chance you somehow manage to win the New Breed Championship. You'd make a mockery out of the title, just as you've made a mockery out of the entire sport. Well if you think for one second that I'm just gonna let you turn the sport I love into a bigger joke than Cody Marshall's title run, then you better start guessing again. I refuse to let a clown like you tarnish everything I have worked so hard to be a part of. I refuse to let you kill off an already ailing title. I swear on everything holy that if it is the last thing I do, I am going to beat your ass and make sure that the New Breed Champion is a man of respect, of class, of skill. I will guarantee that the man who walks away with that Championship belt is me.


Oh and to the creepy dude in green, the one nobody gives a fuck about, do us all a favor and shut the fuck up. You keep running your mouth about how you want vengeance on the world. What, did you want a my pretty pony for your sixth birthday, and your father instead tried to make a man out of you? My god I am getting sick and tired of the side show freaks tarnishing this business with their mere presence. Well tonight, I am gonna savor the chance to run off one of these oddballs before they add another black mark on the face of this sport. You said something about me being a black knight in your way, wrong. I am a king who is taking his crown. And my first act as such is for you to be beheaded in that ring tonight. This is my time, and I will not stand for some special needs freak, coming in and trying to steal what is rightfully mine. Tonight I'm solving the riddle, and sending you back to whatever hole in the wall your rat ass crawled out of, and when I do, you can tell the Moe, Larry, and Curly running around inside that empty noggin of yours, that you got to meet a wrestling champion.

And that of course leaves that overgrown oaf who is getting his greasy fingerprints all over my New Breed title belt. I talk of course about that half wit Jed Clampett, I mean Cody Marshall. Considering their blind luck you can forgive me for getting them confused. I mean one day Cody was shootin for some food and up thru the ground came New Breed gold. Now Cody has found success on a show where I'm not around to kick the shit out of every last son of a bitch in the locker room. But between Cody, Ryan Marx, Rex McAllister, Chris Elite, and my old friend JJ Silva, showdown has done its absolute best to reduce the New Breed Championship from the flag barer of the years to come, to some chump who stumbled and landed on a belt, and if he's really lucky he'll be able to hold on to it for a whole month until he trips himself up again And loses the damn thing. But in just a few minutes I am going to save that Championship. I am about to bring a new era to the New Breed Title. One that will wash away all the mediocrity that the once prestigious belt has had to suffer with. Soon the Mark Michaels era in EAW will rise out the rotten taste of you Cody, and the rest of Dickheads who nearly ruined this title.

How you may ask? Well in case the six generations of in-breading has Made you blind, it's because I am the greatest technical wrestler who's still drawing breath. Now I get that with someone as big, lazy, and immobile as you that's considered just flippy bullshit, but in the world of real athletes, I'm kind of a big deal. How big? Well you'll find out first hand when I'm done kicking your three hundred pound ass from bell to bell just like I did to the jackasses I faced off against last year. Now you may not understand how being the only man in this match with previous experience is a valuable thing, but you will because whether I pin your ass with the screen cracker, make you tap out with a figure four, or send you sailing over the top rope and own to the floor, nothing is going to keep me from sending you back home to Red Neck county with empty hands. But look on the bright side, after this you can focus all your energy into that Make EAW great again campaign just like Maxwell Dachs did. And while your busy with your fools errand, I'll be standing over every brand as the New Breed Champion. Cody, call the wife and tell her to get that bottle of shine you cooked up ready, because every inch of your seven foot ass is gonna be more black and blue than you momma was when your old man used to come home from the tavern. Right now you are in for the longest night of your life, because you're about to step into hell with the devil himself. So bring you best you're gonna need it.

Now I'd say more but they're telling me it's time for me to go. But before I do, just know that Dyansty will see its Destiny, Showdown will rejoice in its savior, Voltage will take pride in its vanguard. And all eyes will be on me, the twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram icon, the #Hero that is about to set the hell's warpath match on fire! The man who has come to Reckless Wiring to take his place as a conquering hero. The man who brings the people to their feet no matter the time or place. The man who has gone above and beyond being just a simple wrestler, but has captured the hearts of people around the world and made himself the biggest crossover star this company will ever know. The man who is hands down the single greatest professional athlete to ever put on a pair of pads and step thru the ropes. The absolute picture of perfection, the Undisputed Social Media Champion, Mark Michaels. And once I'm done you can add savior of the New Breed Championship to that list. So go on ahead and picture THAT!

#RecklessWiring #EAW #HellsWarpath #NewChamp"


44,000,000+users liked this.

Developmental promo #1


@PicPerfectMichaels has posted a status update:

"3 seconds. That is how close I was to becoming the top contender to the Interwire championship. 3 lousy seconds. If it wasn't for that weirdo Methuselah, I would have punched my ticket straight to Reckless Wiring. Instead now I find out that for the second week in a row, the suits in charge of Dynasty have chosen to keep your undisputed Social Media Champion on the shelf collecting dust. Why you may ask, are they keeping the most talented and popular star that the brand has off tv? Well it's simple, they're afraid.


They are afraid because of the power we share together followers. They know that at the snap of my fingers, you can sink their little tv show faster than you can blink your eyes. So they try to keep Dynasty's most desirable man down. They stick me with "competition" who I wipe the floor with in less than a minute. And how do I get rewarded? By having to do the same thing again the next week. And only after I've made complete chumps out of the guys they're sticking across the ring from me, only then do they even think of throwing me a crumb. And at that they stick me in a fatal fourway match where I get robbed of my opportunity to face Drake Jager.

Do I look like some peon who you can pull this crap with like TLA? Hell no I don't! I'm a true talent, who has graced this company by making it the juggernaut it is today. I am the biggest crossover star this place has ever seen. And am I treated with even the most modest piece of respect? If you've read this far you already know that's not the case. They are afraid of me followers because they know that with just one spark, My spotlight will glow even brighter, and every brand of EAW will be throwing itself at me. They'll be offering me the keys to the kingdom just to hear their contract offer.

So in short Monroe, and his cronies and ass kissers are all out to keep me from getting what I do rightfully deserve. But in all the hoopla for Reckless Wiring they made one tiny little over sight. They made the second ever Hell's Warpath match in EAW history not just for the New Breed Championship, but they decided to let an online poll determine the participants. And that right there is we're you, my loyal followers, you can balance the scales. You can go right now and whether it's at the website or on social media @EAW, you can go right now and cast your vote for "Picture Perfect" Mark Michaels to pick up right where he left off last year, and kicking the ever loving shit out of anybody who's fool enough to step thru that curtain. If they thought I was a man on fire last time in Hell's Warpath, just wait till they see what I got in store for them now.

Go cast you vote for me and I promise you that every last overhyped underdeveloped son of a bitch they put in front of me is either getting my knees to their face or their head planted into the mat. And after I'm done tearing thru the rest of the jackasses, I am finally going to lay claim to something that has been a long time coming to me. I will finally get my due recognition, and be proclaimed the Elite Answers Wrestling New Breed Champion. So if you haven't already than cast your vote and start to make those suits up at corporate start to picture THAT! #RecklessWiring #EAW #HellsWarpath2"


39,000,000+users liked this.


Fade to black.

Dynasty promo #4


@PicPerfectMichaels has posted an image:

(An image of white letters against a black background that read 'Sorry that you're just a pussy.')





@PicPerfectMichaels left a comment:

"Nothing makes me feel better than getting a good set in the gym, and putting little birches like Lucas Johnson in their place. So as of right now I can say that it's a good day today. You know someone showed me a video of this little jerk off running his mouth about how he deserved to have a title shot handed to him. How he should have won the young Lion's cup, and about how he's somehow better than actually having to earn title matches. Let me tell you something Lucas, only winners get championships. Not whinny little jackasses who fall flat on their faces each and every time they step up to the plate. Let me ask you something Lucas, what's the difference between now and a month ago? Or even the month before that? I'll tell you right now that there is no difference. Your still the same over privileged asshole, a bully who peaked in high school and longs for his glory days when his buddies would kiss his ass for giving swirlees to the nerds. I dare you to Just try and stuff me, or anybody else on the roster for that matter, into a locker and I guarantee that you'll get smacked so hard that double chin will come flying off your neck.

You wanna talk about lockers, and cars, and tables, and guns, bring all that crap to the ring this Friday and you'd still find a way choke. You'd still find a way to fuck up and watch the number one contenders spot slip thru your fingers... again! Because you are not a big match player, you're not man who excels when the spotlight is cast on him like I do. You're not the main event, you're what they throw out there when the crowd needs a bathroom break. Lucas it's time for you to wake up and take a good look around, because your about to step in the ring with the man who never gets out done in a big match situation. The man who stands center stage and elevates his performance when all eyes are on him. And you my friend are about the find out firsthand just what a true contender to a championship looks like.

Lucas, you need to start setting your sights on attainable goals. You want a clothing line even though you have no since of style. You want a private jet even though nobody would book your ass, except maybe Sebastian Monroe or one of his puppets. You want to hold something as prestigious as the Interwire championship even though you are just simply not up to snuff. What a man of your skills should be focusing on is trying to reach Lettuce washer at McDonalds.


Face it Lucas, you're just not Championship material. That's why you have spent months on end digging, and clawing, and whining, and bitching about wanting a title match, instead of actually you know earning one. You're totally pathetic, thinking you're amongst the true elite of this company because you catch a fluke win every once in a great while. Because anyone can catch a lucky break on any given night, but true greats are the ones who night in and night out put on the show stopping performances. Who go out and pull off a win in convincing fashion just about every time out. The true greats are the men who can actually get the job done when they get their opportunities. That's what separates a chump like you from a an all star like me.

Come on down Luke, lock up with me one more time and let's see if you can go two for two against absolute perfection. Go ahead and lock me in that Machine Break bullcrap, broken arm or not, nothing is going to stop me from getting that Interwire title match. Because bones will heal, but holding a championship, that will last forever.

Oh and in case you thought I forgot about the other two unfortunate bastards who I'm gonna torch from the moment the bell ring, think again.


I keep hearing about how much of a tough guy this Atiliano Castillos is. But for the life of me, I haven't heard a peep out of him since this match was announced. I bet you he's shaking in his shoes wishing he could back out of this match. That he could find a rock to hide under so that he doesn't have to be outright embarrassed by the unequaled ass kicking he's about to receive. Atiliano is about to learn that it doesn't matter how hard you hit, or how fast you can strike, when you get your head planted into the mat via a Picture Perfect, all that you're gonna be able to do is stare up at the lights while I'm getting my hand raised in Victory.

That's what happens to a no talent punk when he steps in the ring with the unquestioned greatest professional wrestler this company has ever seen! He becomes a mop, because I'm gonna wipe the floor up with him. After this Friday Atiliano will wish he had just stuck to trading crack for blowjobs, or vice versa, I'm not entirely sure with him. After that final bell has is finished ringing, Castillos will forever be known as overrated, overhyped, underdeveloped son of a bitch who got exposed as such because he thought he could hang with Mark Michaels.


Speaking of guys who think they could hang, let's talk about Methuselah for a moment. The guy who's a pediphile one moment, a granny fucker the next, and by this time next month a tranny hooker connoisseur, and even then no one would lay the guy. How is it that this joker thinks he can still try and run that hokey mystic crap anymore? Has he been drinking his own goddamn kool-aid? He must be if he keeps running his mouth about some kind of God of flies. Live on Dynasty, I'm gonna do him a favor and wake him up and get him to quit yammering on and on about this bullshit he's been taking, by beating his ass from bell to bell.


Because when you step into the ring with Mark Michaels, all the fantasies you dream up in your playtime get kicked right out the door. And all that's left is is the undeniable truth that Mark Michaels stands head and shoulders over each and every bastard who is dumb enough to even think about trying to best me in the ring.

Let's see these so called powers that you have been granted. Let your creepy hentai monster God just try to wrap his tenticles around me, if he even has enough balls to even try. Come at me bro, or as you would put it, test me brethren. Prove you can still go when it's all on the line, prove that after all the bullShit you spout off about that you still have what it takes to be relevant in the ring. Or at the very least try to die with a little dignity before you are turned into the next meal for the new top of the food chain here in EAW.

Enough with the games. Enough with the amulets, enough with the whining over bitches you were never gonna get with. Man the fuck up, and get your head on straight, becuase I'm not gonna stand from any of your spilt personality crap after I pin you one, two, three in the middle of the ring.

And that more or less goes for the rest of you as well, because after this Friday, I don't want to hear anybody bitching about the best man in the fight winning. I don't want to hear any lame excuses, like how you stubbed your toe in training, or you just plum forgot you had a match this week. You are all about to step into the ring with the only man In this match who's not only worthy of facing Drake Jager, but beating him and taking possession of the EAW Interwire Championship. The man who is a new dawn in Elite Answers Wrestling. The man who is leading the way to a new and better era of EAW. You are stepping into the ring with the twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero who is about to take his rightful place in the pantheon of greatness, starting by winning this fourway match and going on to take that championship belt off of Drake Jager.

The biggest and brightest burning star that this company has seen, or ever will see. The man who is the personification of greatness, and the embodiment of Perfection. Simply put the greatest professional athlete to ever grace an EAW ring with his presence, who is done with waiting and ready to take what is due to him. The reigning, defending, and undisputed Champion of all social media, "Picture Perfect" Mark Michaels.

And when I'm done with the three of you, I'm on my way to terminate the T-1000, so everybody better start falling in line, and start Picturing THAT! #EAW #Dynasty #MainEvent #Friday"



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Dynasty promo # 1


@PicPerfectMichaels has uploaded a status update:


"You know a lot of people have been posting comments and wondering why I've been a bit quiet this week. First I just wanted everyone to know I'm fine, second as to why I've been on the #DL it's because I've been working overtime in the gym to get ready for my upcoming bout against Lucas Jackass, or jerkoff, or whatever the hell his name is.

Now I say that knowing that Lucas is a hell of a wrestler. A damn fine mat general with this nice little intensity that he's added, it makes him a threat. But this Friday in the Hampton Colosseum, he better be prepared To match up against The guy who gonna match him move for move, the guy who just when luke thinks thinks he has me just where he wants me, WHAM #ScreenCracker #1-2-3

Now before all the haters out there say I'm being an arrogant asshole, understand that I'm saying what I'm saying because after that loss to Kelly Hackenschmidt, it's more than motivated me. It's lit a fire under me the likes of which have never been seen. Everybody better be prepared for a hungrier, more motivated Mark Michaels, because 2017 is the Perfect year to add some gold around my waist, and now that Lucas Johnson, who just happened to be in that fatal four way for the number one contendership has been place right in my sights, there's no better time than right now to toss my name right back into the hat as far as getting a title shot in the near future.

This Friday night, in front of the good people of Hampton, Virginia, the Wrestling Machine is gonna get shut down, courtesy of Dynasty's own Twitter Trendsetter, Instagram Icon, and #Hero to every single soul who helped us sell out Coliseum (thank you all from the bottom of my heart). People who whether they will be celebrating the inauguration of our president elect, or lamenting it. Whether they were saying make America great again, or that it always has been. This Friday night, I will be more than happy to represent both the left and the right, liberals and conservatives, reds blues blacks whites and other person in everywhere they allow me to, as THIER social media champion.

So come on down this Friday Lucas, because this Friday even though you have the freedom to, you won't have to choose between black or blue when I plant my boot directly up your ass. Go in ahead and Picture That. #EAW #Dynasty."


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Fade to black.

Voltage Promo #2
 
@PicPerfectMichaels has uploaded a photo:




 
 
 
@PicPerfectMichaels has left a comment:
 
"I do not consider myself a religious man, but this particular verse has always ringed true to me. Yes dark times do come, and sometimes you don't think you'll ever see past it, but if you hold out, and push thru all the disparity, and hardship you will bask in the light at the end of the tunnel.  Now sure there are gonna be people who try to say that darkness is reality, or some other nonsense like that, but always remember that people who talk that kind of crap, they vanish along with The darkness when light begins to shine.
 
I know that @InsaneSavior Is right now thinking about every twisted and sucking thing he'd like to do in the ring. I know he's probably gathering together all of deviant minds who flock to him, and preparing them for some wicked purpose that I don't want to even try to imagine. Diemos and his old lady are two of the most demented weirdos that EAW has ever seen.  But I'm telling you right now followers that as big and bad as they try to be, there is not a snowflake's chance in hell that they're gonna walk over me and the Mexican Samurai this Sunday night, because the light that shines bright, always sends the darkness running back home to momma, and the brightest burning stars in EAW today are myself and Mexi.
 
That's Mr. & Mrs. Diemos, you are about to go toe to toe with the two guys on the EAW roster that nobody wants to be matched up against. The two guys that have every last person in that arena chanting for them from the pre-show all the way to the final bell. The two guys who are gonna  have every last man, woman, and child on their feet inside the Rupp Arena on their feet this Sunday.
 
Now Diemos, I know your going to spout some bull crap about how you're either A. Beat me and mexi this Sunday, or B.  Squeal like a pig about how Deliverance is your pick for the greatest movie of all time. In either case I'm going to show you just how wrong you are, because we've tangled before, I've taken your best shots, and you know what, I'm still here. So is most everyone else you've run your little boogie man stichk with, hell even though fried his ass more  than those cheesy tots at burger king (guiltiest pleasure love that they’re back)   Zack Crash is still hanging around, so this Sunday come at me bro, cause just like all the rest I’ll still be standing in the end.
 
And Alexis, I would never speak ill of a lady, thank god your nothing more than an emo chick who's watched a few too many Tim Burton movies. You're so dark and moody, and a bit bitchy, and you have this thing about children, your like an Angelina Jolie wannabe only with out the looks, or talent, or genuine creepiness that she had in her younger days. I mean I've been studying up on you, and from what I've seen, I'm am anything but impressed.  Between Your long diatribes highlighted by bland insults, its no wonder why an incompetent oaf like Diemos put a ring in your finger. That bastard love child of Zack Galifianakis and the Pillbury doughboy, needs someone as unremarkable as you, to make him look remotely interesting by comparison. Seriously you are duller than a crayon that's been worn down to an itty bitty nub (you know like your bra size).   Honey, you best know now that I’m not gonna take it easy ( #DoubleEntendre) on you, or any of your over hyped, under developed, Louisiana sewer swamp for brains having children, so better bring you’re a-Game cause you’re gonna need it.
 
This Sunday night you two interbreeding jackasses, face off with one of the baddest men to ever step foot in the ring, a man who can pound your face into mush with his fist, or snap a limb with his submissions.  The former Interwire champion who believe you me is very worthy of all the success he’s had so far, and is deserving of even more, the man they call the Mexican Samurai.
 
And standing next to him will be the guy who’s always at the top of his game, the man who will give every last drop of blood, sweat, and tears to pull out a victory.  The man who before the good people of Lexington, Kentucky is going to show you just why so many people have made him an Instagram Icon, a Twitter Trendsetter, and the hashtag Hero.  The man who reps every last member of the EAW audience, each time he steps thru the curtain.  The guy who they know is gonna give them their money’s worth whenever he’s on the card, and that is exactly what I am going to do this Sunday!  Get ready Diemos, because even though you find strength in the darkness, Sunday night you are gonna be stepping into the ring with a white hot spotlight!  And like I’ve Stated before the darkness will NEVER overcome the light.  #Voltage #EAW #TagTeamGrandPrix #PictureThat!"
 
 

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