Welcome old members and new visitors, EAW is still going stronger than ever and now runs out of a new upgraded forum! Be sure to check us out over at http://www.eawnetwork.com
Elite Answers Wrestling
Welcome old members and new visitors, EAW is still going stronger than ever and now runs out of a new upgraded forum! Be sure to check us out over at http://www.eawnetwork.com
The Land of Elite
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| EAW IS LEAVING FORUMOTION. WE HAD A NICE RUN HERE FOR 4 YEARS BUT OUR NEW FORUM WEBSITE WILL BE RAN OUT OF THIS LINK: eawnetwork.comJOIN THERE TODAY |||||||||||||||||||||||| KEEP AN EYE OUT FOR FOR MAIN SITE, eawrestling.com FOR MAJOR CHANGES, INCLUDING A NEW DESIGN, UPDATED ARCHIVES AND MORE WITHIN THE COMING DAYS AND WEEKS |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
@PicPerfectMichaels:“Never have these words had so much meaning. See over the past week, hell over the past year really, we as a nation have been divided over ideals, over our past, present, and most definitely our future. Not that we haven’t been, but over the course of the past 12 + months, We’ve been divided seemingly more than ever, to the point of where it might tear us all apart for good! I’ve kept silent about these issues till now, mostly because I felt it was not my place to speak. There have already been enough people who have either shouted for joy at the results of what happened last Tuesday, or have shouted in anger over the same result. I wasn’t going to speak at all, until I found out that this week’s episode of Dynasty will take place in Louisville, Kentucky. It was then That I recalled Kentucky’s state motto. That Perfect Motto of United we stand, Divide we fall. Why you might be asking? Because it is a motto that I live my life by.
See I have said it before, and I will say it again, I am YOUR social media champion, and Every week I go out there and give my all to do each and every one of you proud! I do my damnedest to represent each and every man, woman, and child that may be watching Dynasty live in an arena, or catching the show as it airs on tv, or even reading a transcript of the show online, I go out there every week to entertain each and every one of you. So this Friday night, whether you’ve voted red or blue, regardless of who you are, or where you’re from, or where you work, or where you pray, or who you love. Whether it be sitting in the front row of the Freedom Arena, or your laying down on the couch, I am asking that you would all stand with me, because our unity is our greatest strength!
Together there is nothing we cannot accomplish! We can move mountains together, we can part seas. And as long as we all stand as one, nothing, not even the darkest depths can ever hope to overcome us! No, not even the pits of hell, are stronger than all of us combined. That is why this Friday night I ask that you all stand with me when I go one on one with Hades.
Now I know a few people are out there saying ‘Mark there’s no way you could ever hope to stand against a foe like Hades.’ And don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying it would be easy to. Hades is one of the strongest forces in EAW has ever known. Just take a look at his resume (go ahead and look it up, I’ll wait) And it’s plain to see that Hades has earned every last bit of his reputation. He’s won countless titles, and he’s been a nightmare that still haunts some elitist to this vary day. SURRIVING against Hades is a hard enough challenge, let alone winning the actual match. Make no mistake about it, I don’t dare underestimate Hades, but by the same token, Hades should not underestimate me. He may have the strength and size, But he sure as hell can’t match me in determination. The same determination that drove me since I was a kid to become a professional wrestler. The same determination that has brought me to the biggest wrestling promotion in the world, Elite Answers Wrestling! The same determination that has inspired me ask everyone, from every side of the spectrum, to let me prove myself as their Social Media Champion.
Hades has done it all in this business, but he has never faced anyone who was more willing to walk to hell and back to get a win. Friday night I’m asking Hades to bring his A-Game, because you know I’m bringing mine, and when the people of Louisville start cheering at the top of their lungs, and I’m talking feeling the ring shake from just how loud they’re gonna get, I am gonna be feeding off of every last one of them. Soaking up every last ounce of energy they send my way, I know that they will give me all the strength I need to get my hand raised.
And Hades if you happen to be reading this, just know that even though I respect you and everything you’ve accomplished here in EAW, this Friday night you are gonna see first hand just why so many people have gotten behind me on social media, turning me into a twitter trendsetter, and Instagram icon. You get to know why so many people the #Hero when mentioning me. It is because from bell to bell there is nobody who can go quite like Mark Michaels. No one will ever take everything you have to dish out, and still be standing wanting to go quite like me. No one will ever bring you to your absolute limit the way that I can. And whether you believe me or not, no one will ever make you wonder, what is it that I have to do to actually put this guy away like me.
10/24/2016 – Front Door of EAW headquarters - 8:59 AM
(A press conference is being held in front of EAW headquarters where the press is waiting for the address over something that happened on the October 21, 2016 edition of Dynasty. Sebastian Monroe approaches the podium)
Monroe: Welcome and thank you for joining us at this press conference. It is my understanding that one of our employees may have offended some of you. Some things were said, and some things were done, and let me just remind all of you that we do not condone that type of behavior. Please not associate his actions with how we run this business. As Elite Answers Wrestling, we strive to provide the best form of entertainment for all of our fans. But as for now, let us proceed with the issue at hand.
On October 21, 2016, one of our newest signee, Moongoose McQueen had won a match. Shortly after the match, there was an “interference” in our systems, where the ending was interrupted for a message from one of our other seasoned employees. Now fortunately, viewers at home were able to see just that. However, Moongoose McQueen, furious that his victory was interrupted proceeded to, “Curse profusely in front of children, harassing fans, destroying private property and belongings, obscene gestures, indecent exposure in which his bare butt was exposed, and threatening to kill whomever was responsible.” All in a matter of 15 seconds. Now unfortunately, for the amount that we pay him, which isn’t a lot, in exchange, Mr. McQueen has a contract that doesn’t allow us to fire him under these circumstances. His contract, here, and I quote, “Bitch please, I probably have more money than the guy that owns this company. Just give me the same salary amount you pay the least amount to someone here. Probably a Vixen. But in return, my contract cannot be terminated for these following reasons.”
It is a very long list, and we don’t have all day to discuss. But this brings us to today’s conference, where Moongoose McQueen has not only paid the fines for breaking the law and violating EAW’s policies, but he will be issuing a public apology.
(Moongoose McQueen, in a black sequin suit with sunglasses bursts out of the EAW front doors as the crowd boos. McQueen approaches the podium.)
McQueen:….. (clears throat) Now I know why you have all gathered here today. As a man, are we not allowed to have faults. After all, it is from our mistakes that we learn and better ourselves. We aren’t perfect, but we can certainly strive to be perfect. With that said and done, I apologize for spoiling the Walking Dead hours before the premiere of the latest season. I should not had tweet that “James Knight’s EAW Career is as dead as Abraham and Glenn. #TWD#EAW#DrugsAreBadM’kay”
(The assistant grabs McQueen by the shoulder and whispers in his ears)
McQueen: I’m not apologizing for that? But people were so butthurt about that? Fine… FINE!! I apologize for causing a scene at McDonalds over one missing McNugget. It was a matter of principles. (Assistant whispers in his ears) Not it either? Ok. It is about the time I broke into a zoo and freed all the kangaroos? (Assistant shakes his head.)
McQueen: Running around the city in my underwear yelling I am a Jedi?
Assistant: Nope
McQueen: Constantly making fun of fans’ favorite EAW’s LGBT figure?
Assistant: No, Sir.
McQueen: Good, because I’m never going to apologize for making fun of Nick. Is this about the time I grabbed that woman by the pussy? I had really low blood sugar. I got a little dizzy and next thing you know, I reached my hand out to grab something, fell forward, and when I regained consciousness, she was screaming hysterically “SEXUAL HARASSMENT!! It’s actually a sweet story guys. This is how I met my wife.
Assistant: No, NO!!
McQueen: THEN WHAT THE FUCK AM I HERE TO APOLOGIZE ABOUT?
(The Assistant whispers in McQueen’s ear.)
McQueen: Oh.. THAT?!! Oh, no, I’m not apologizing for that. So I said a few bad words and showed the world my glorious ass. You’re welcome, world, but I was being disrespected. I have every right to be angry and did the things I did. Were my actions wrong? Yes, but what are you going to teach your kids, parents? That cursing is wrong and destroying thing is frowned upon or would you rather teach your kids if someone doesn’t show them proper respect, they shouldn’t do anything at all? What kind of stupid lesson is that to teach? You want to know why I’m here and why I am still with this company? Because I am by definition, living the American Dream, being the true success that I am today, I am role model. See, now you will all now know exactly what kind a man Moongoose McQueen is. I do whatever I want, how I want, and while that behavior has brought me some trouble, that same behavior has allowed me to command the respects of my peers. Now don’t get me wrong. I don’t go around asking for trouble. I’m not the type of guy that looks for the biggest guy in the locker room and punch him in the face to prove how tough I am. It just so happens, Trouble has a way of coming to me, and last Friday was no exception when I my victory was interrupted. My actions last week were simply a case where some “big shot” thinks he can tell me to move out of his way and me planting my foot to the ground instead and pushing back and telling them to move. I am the victim here.
Reporter 1: Mr. McQueen. Can you explain the video that was released shortly after the show.
McQueen: I have no idea what you are talking about.
Reporter 1: Roll out the tv. We are talking about the viral video of you assaulting a camera man.
McQueen: I still don’t know what you are talking about.
Reporter 1: We want the truth.
McQueen: YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE FUCKING TRUTH!!!
Reporter 1: Play the video.
(The viral video shows McQueen in the camera room during the middle of the show. McQueen has one of the crew members pinned to the wall.)
10/21/2016 - Backstage of Dynasty (Camera Room) - 8:23 PM
McQueen: Why did you interrupt me?!! HUH?!! How can I show off the merchandise if you pull off crap like this. What is the first rule of working the camera?
Crew: Help me…!!
McQueen: (slaps the crew member) Don’t look at him… Look at me.. (slap) What is the first rule? (slap slap slap). Keep.
Crew: Keep?.....
McQueen: The Camera….. on the star. SAY IT!! (slap)
Crew: Keep the Camera on the star.
McQueen: (slap) Good, now why did you break that rule?
Crew: Will someone please get this guy off… (slap slap slap)
McQueen: I told you to look at me, not at him. Now answer the question.
Crew: It’s on the fuckin’ schedule.
McQueen: (slap) ….. LANGUAGE!! And let me see. (McQueen rips the schedule out of his hand)….. Opening, Senn’ victory speech. Match 1…. Match… 2 … blah blah blah. Match featuring me… and oh, look at that… Stupid segment after the match. I see. …. WELL WHO PUT THAT IN THERE?!!
Crew: Blackstar…. PLEASE, STOP SLAPPING ME.
McQueen: (lets the camera guy down….. slaps) … Why didn’t you just say that sooner? Now who the hell is Blackstar?
Crew: He is a wrestler here. A Big shot too.
McQueen: I see, well. Here is my business card. If you want to go get the guy that is responsible for all this, give me a call. I’m the guy for the job.
Crew: But you’re the one that…..
McQueen: I SAID…. The guy responsible for this… aka, not me. The Blackstar guy. It will appear that you have made the request, I accept. I will avenge my honor and get the man that had the balls to disrespect me on live television for you.
Crew: Sure… whatever, just please stop slapping me.
McQueen: (walking away) Hey, is that guy filming us? Are you getting my good side?
(The video ends and the attention shift back to McQueen)
Monroe: Our apologies, folks. I do not know how that video got out, but we will find out who and punish them accordingly.
McQueen: Now, now. Settle down. Bitches. First of all, that camera guy was only doing his job, and that was focusing the shot on the star, AKA, me. He did the right thing. As for the incident, yes, that was me….. and no, I will not be apologizing for that. Because you see, as a real man, I’m not going to turn on my personal code and way of living. You can’t tame a guy like me. When I am angry, my entire soul becomes enraged. When I laugh, I laugh with all my heart. I have always lived honestly, and when you ask, does he honestly believe his own hype. I say, “Bitch, I am the hype.” It’s true, it’s true. You may all look at Moongoose McQueen as simply a stubborn arrogant man. But deep down, I am a free man and no one can chain me. Not this guy here (Monroe), not the media, not the world. You all may hate me now, but come and get to know me. Drinks are on me after this conference. You might still hate me, but you may learn to love me too. But the most important of all, you will all have no choice but to respect me. You see, your typical average person would let this go. Oh yeah, it’s just one interruption, it probably won’t happen again. But next thing you know, it happens again, and again, and before you know it, everyone walks all over you. And no one uses Moongoose McQueen as a stepping stone. I am building the wall, right here, and right now. You think you can do whatever you want on my time, guess what, it’s going to be on my terms. You may think, who the hell is this guy? Shouldn’t he, the new guy, be the walking on egg shells? No, that is how mediocre people make it in the industry. Kissing ass and slowly waiting for their time. I am an alpha first, and I honestly really have just one rule. Don’t cross into my territory. Don’t take my spotlight. Don’t interrupt me while I do my thing, and we can all co-exist until EAW gives me the next opponent. All I want to do is run my business. I want to make dreams a reality. I want to help people. I want to show the world that one man really can make a difference, and all he demands is respect. Now, I’m going to get away with this. I am a man with a lot of power. I have money, I have the talent, the charisma, and the willpower to do anything. People call me the man with no fear, and In a sense, people are afraid of me. People will say Power and fear go together. Some of the guys back here think they are the next Stalin or Batman. But I have always been a man that commands Respect and gained power that way. I know very powerful people in this industry. No, I am not friends with them, in fact, most of them hate my guts, but each and every one of them will vouch that Moongoose McQueen ain’t no coward. He ain’t no pushover, and never in his life has he been someone’s bitch. And it doesn’t start today. Sorry guys, just because you all are accustomed to letting people get away with shitting all over you, doesn’t mean I have to. I make my own rules, and I live by it, and that makes me better than you. Haters are gonna hate, but they hate what they can’t be. Now if you excuse me, I’m heading to my bar. Drinks are still on me if you are interested. No more questions or comments.
(McQueen walks away, but stops for one moment)
McQueen: Almost forgot. Tune in this Friday for Dynasty where I will address this entire issue. Spoiler Alert, I won’t be asking for an apology like you losers. (McQueen cracks his knuckles) I intend to beat it out of them. Expect more of that wacky, crazy, Moongoose McQueen antics. Watch carefully, you all might learn a thing or two.
(McQueen walks away as Sebastian Monroe shakes his head in regret)
Monroe: Thank you for coming today. Mr. McQueen feels sorry if he offended anyone.
McQueen in the background: HA!!! THAT’S A GOOD ONE!!
Monroe: DAMN IT, MCQUEEN, YOU HAD ONE SIMPLE JOB!!
McQueen in the background: DON’T MAKE ME COME OVER THERE AND SLAP YOU. I CAN DO IT! IT’S IN MY CONTRACT!!
For the love of god, can someone please tell @MexicanSamuraiJ, that 95% of those nerd references he dropped went over my head. The reason why is because while he was busy playing with his own joystick, I was busy getting laid in real life. so now that the fun and GAMES are over, let's get down to what really matters, this Monday night in Colorado Springs. Now you were able to put 2 & 2 together, and figured out that the reason I wanted to face you on Battleground, is because you are the holder of the EAW Interwire Championship, which means quite a bit in this company. Since you won that title, you've taken that next step in becoming a certified, first ballot hall of famer. And if I could ever expect to do the same, I have to be able to say that I'm at least as good as you are. But don't get it twisted, to say I've never faced anyone with your level of talent would be a bit of the stretch. Just ask guys like Mr. DEDEDE, Y2Impact, Zack Crash, Tig Kelly (I still want my rematch), and Lucian Black, and every last one of them will tell you that Mark Michaels is no push over. See I've taken every one of those great men, and pushed them to their limits inside the ring. So don't be surprised if beating your ass is just another day at the office to me, because I've gone to war with some of the undisputed best that EAW will ever know. But still the question lingers, like foul stench that fills the air. 'Can Mark Michaels win when everything is on the line?' that's what I need to prove, to everyone. Because while there might be some how are content to just meander around, and let the chips fall where they may, I refuse to allow my relevance in this company fall to some pencil pusher who wouldn't know the first thing about wrestling a match. I am taking my destiny into my own hands, and I will fight till the very last breath, to stay a member of the EAW roster.
So this Monday when we face off Mexi, do me a big favor, and bring your A-Game because I'm bringing mine. I want you at your absolute best when we face off, that way there'll be no excuses from who ever doesn't get their hand raised when that final bell rings. There'll be nothing held back in this one. Not a a submission, or suplex, nor a top rope risk that can change the tide of the match. This is everything, or nothing, and you better bet your ass that I'm coming to the World Arena for the former, and sure has hell not the latter.
This Monday night, I am going to show you exactly why my in ring preformances have led to me being called The Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero to millions of people from all around the world. These people have humbled me but always voicing their support, and even going so far as to call me their Social Media Champion. I owe them so much, that's why win, lose, or draw this match is for them. And if this is the last time they see the bastion of Battleground, then I promise that they will get a show, like nothing they've ever seen before. And when all is said and done, they can say that they got to see the Brightest Burning Star that EAW will ever know, put on the match of a life time.
"Just got this DM'd to me from one of my biggest fans. #Thankful."
(The video opens with a montage of shots, first some of Michael's getting his photo for match cards taken)
"I"m So fancy, you already know, I'm in the fast lane, from L.A., to Tokyo."
(*Cut to shots of Michaels warming up before his match, slipping on his ring vest)
"I'm so fancy, can't you taste this gold, remember my name..."
(Cut to a shot of Michaels backstage at the gorilla position, stepping thru the entrance curtain.)
"... Bout to Blow."
( The cuts become more rapid, a new scene for almost every chord change. shots of Michaels walking down the entrance ramp, mouthing words to the crowd, connnecting with the discuss punch.)
"Two, three, four. First things first, I'm the realest, drop this, and let the whole world feel it."
(Michaels nailing a swinging neck breaker, a knee drop, and a discuss punch.)
"And I'm still in the murder business, I can hold you down like I'm giving lessons in physics."
(Michaels nailing several closthlines, and a fist drop. several close ups of his Million dollar grin.)
"If you want a bad trick like this, drop it low and pick it up like this. Cup of ace, cup of goose, cup of crys, High Heels, something worth a half a ticket on your wrist."
(Michaels using a selfie stick as a weapon against several different opponents)
"Take it all straight, never chase that."
(Michaels lounging in a nightclub with two beautiful models.)
"Rooftops like we bringing eighty eight back."
(Michaels with both a snap, and fisherman's suplex, and the DDT)
"Bring the hook in, where the base at?"
(Michaels getting his hand raised by a referee.)
"Champagne spilling, you should taste that"
(Scenes from several Michaels promos)
"I'm so fancy, you already know. I'm in the fast lane, from L.A. to Tokyo. I'm so fancy, can't you taste this gold? Remember my name, bout to blow."
(Michaels getting busted open by Trent Yoder, Diamond Cuttered off a ladder, walking back up the ramp with a disapointed look on his face.)
"Baby I do this, I thought that you knew this. Can't stand no haters, and honest the truth is."
(Michaels with a double under hook back breaker, and the satio suplex)
"That my flow hypnotic, each beat it departed. Swagger so stupid I can't shop in no department."
(Michaels with figure four leg locks on several different opponents)
"To get my money on time, if they not money decline. I swear I meant that there so much I'll give that line a rewind."
(Michaels with the reverse DDT neck breaker, a stiff clothesline, and a shot of him mocking his opponent in the ring)
"To get my money on time, if they not money decline. I just can't worry about no haters, gotta stay on my grind. Now tell me who that, who that? That do that, do that? put that paper over all I though you knew that, knew that."
(Michaels checking himself out with his camera phone.)
I be the M-A-D-D-Y, put my name in bold. I've been working up in here,with some change to throw."
(The guitar's rythem keeps up in the background, as we cut the scene from Michaels house.)
Michaels: "I have to prove this to everyone, even myself. If I can't beat Mexican Samurai, I don't belong in EAW."
(The vocals pick bak up, as we see shots of Michaels hitting the spinebuster, and the second rope leg drop.)
"Crash the hotel! We party on till the break of dawn. Make the Phone call. Feels so good getting what I want."
(Michaels connecting with the Picture perfect, and the screen cracker.)
"Yeah keep on turning it up, chandelier swinging we don't give a what. Film star, yeah I'm deluxe, classic expensive. You don't get to touch."
(shots of Michaels celebrating a win.)
"I'm so fancy, you already know, I'm in the fast lane, from L.A. to Tokyo. I'm so fancy, can't you taste this gold? Remember my name bout to blow."
(an echo of Michaels word's, as the video nears it's con conclusion.)
Michaels: "It's all, or nothing, somethings gotta give."
"Everywhere I go people always ask me, what is the difference between a Trend and a fad. To me the answer is that a trend leaves an imprint on the culture that that adopted it. Like how Tie-Dye clothes, and Volkswagen vans are almost synonymous with the America in the 1960's. Meanwhile a fad gets tossed aside almost as fast soon as it becomes popular because there isn't much to a fad besides the novelty of it. Now everyone and their mother already knows that I'm a trend who has forever changed the landscape of EAW, and in case you happen to be wondering, I can tell you right now, without a single shadow of a doubt, that the biggest fad in EAW right now, is Phoenix Winterborn. I mean this guy has been here about two months, barely ekes out a win in a match that had absolutely nothing on the line, and now every lame brain halfwit wants to jump on the Phoenix Winterborn band wagon. And you can tell that all this sudden popularity has gone straight to his head, because now he want to talk some kind of bullshit about him being more popular than me. allow me make one thing perfectly clear pal, If I had been one of the options in that vote, you're ass would have been stuck on the couch watching Reckless Wiring on EAW Network. #WhereYouBelong
And while I have your attention let me ask you something, How can you claim to be a a longtime veteran of this industry one moment, and then act like your a total rookie the next? let me tell you something, if I had worked for almost TWO decades, and then had accomplished barely to compare myself to someone who's been wrestling less than five years, I'd would start thinking about calling it a career. Yes I've had my wars against greats in this company, and I've had title shots (Because I, you know EARNED them by winning matches, and proving myself as a competitor) against men who will one day be counted among the select few who are chosen to enter the EAW Hall Of Fame. So why don't you do yourself a favor, and call up some of those guys who like you, thought they could discredit my natural greatness. Ask, and they'll tell you about how Mark Michaels gave them an ass kicking they will never forget, and that they won't be so quick to talk shit about me the next time we face off.
This Saturday night, at Reckless Wiring, I am going to make you wish you had never even been considered for this match. You are in for the biggest, grade A, ass kicking the world has ever seen, and no it won't be eloquent, there will be nothing fancy about me tearing you to shreds from the word go. Just like I've done to everyone who's stood in front of me this past month, and just like I'm going to do after the bell rings in Kansas City, and I am declared the EAW New Breed Champion.
And let us not forget about @MaxwellDachs (even though he's given us no reason not to). Why have you been so quiet Max? Is it because you know that I'm going to cut right thru you like a hot knife thru butter? Or are you just so far gone into your self-loathing that you can't even muster up more than one sad, mopey, pathetic sorry ass, diatribe, that sounds more like a cry to be put out of your fucking misery than a an actual statement about our match. If that's all you've got left in you Max then you may as well follow thru with your promise to retire after I'm finished kicking the ever loving shit out of you. But before you go Maxie, I want to dig deep down inside yourself, and I want you to bring your absolute best to Reckless Wiring. I want you to leave whatever you have left of you inside the ring. I want the Maxwell Dachs who will throw caution to the wind and do whatever it takes to try pull out a win. Not because you might against all odds actually pull out a victory, but because I will not stand for you phoning it in this Saturday night, and giving all of those head stuck in the sand haters a reason to run their ignorant, shit filled mouths!
You boys can go ahead, and start begging for mercy right now (Not that you'll find any) because the two of you are about to be outclassed in every imaginable facet. I am going to go out in front of a sold out crowd at the Sprint Center, and proceed to torch both of your asses. And after I am done I will finally start getting the proper recognition that I deserve. It's my time now, and neither one of you jackasses are gonna be enough to stop me, because to be able to do you'd have to do the one thing this isn't humanly possible. be better than Perfect. After this Saturday, there will not be a doubt as to why I am called The Twitter Trendsetter, The Instagram Icon, the #Hero to millions upon millions of people from ever place, every race, and every walk of life around this great big world. These people have set their eyes upon each and every action I take, every place I go, and Every word I say. And in doing so, they have chosen to exalt me as their Undisputed Social Media Champion. They know that I am the total package who is unmatched when it comes to Looks, charisma, and in ring skill. That is why I am the Destiny of Dynasty. That is why I am the Brightest Burning Star that EAW will ever know, and most importantly, that Is why, I can say without a single moment of hesitation, that I will be the next Elite Answers Wrestling New Breed Champion! #RecklessWiring8#EAW#NewBreedChmapionship#BringHomeTheGold"
"This just about sums up my feelings about @DustinBranch & @KevinHunter. The only thing worst than having to deal with those two jackasses... again, is the fact that I have to do it in this backwoods town that's stuffed to the gills with dumbass, ignorant, redneck, haters, who think that 5 mbps is great internet speed #SMH. How does anyone expect a man of my standing, to tolerate being stuck in this town that must actually be the eighth circle of hell. If it wasn't for the fact that the number one contender for the New Breed championship will be determined in my Triple threat match, I'd have phoned in sick, that's how bad it is out here. Someone remind me to never work this town again. But at least being stuck here wont be in vain. For it is here in this lowly city, that I will correct a egregious error. Because here in bumfuck... I mean Biloxi, Mississippi, that I am going to kick the ever living shit out two of EAW's biggest piles of dog droppings.
First off there's Dustin Brasch,Professional Wrestling's answer to almond milk. A man who is so dull, bland, and boring, you'd find it more entertaining to watch paint dry. But you know what makes it worst? The undeniable fact that Dustin just can't cut it in the big matches. Oh sure, he was the last man standing in that Hell's Warpath, but who did he beat to win that match again? It sure as hell wasn't me, because that meth mouth smelling bastard Hunter, sucker punched me from behind, and screwed me out of winning. But if whoever reading this is just some head in the sand hater in denial of my greatness, then how about some more proof of Dustin being a fluke, I mean just look what happened to him after Rising Tide. He's been showing his true colors, and getting his ass kicked by Dynasty's A-list. And this Friday nigh, he steps into the ring with the man, whose name is at the top of that list. Dustin has failed to learn from his recent history, and even if he did, he's still doomed to repeat it. Because once again, live in front of the entire Dynasty audience, I'm going to leave him flat on his back, and staring up at the lights. #Guaranteed
And don't worry about me over looking you Kevin, someone linked me that cute video you and all the other members of the lollipop guild, and I'll be sure to remember it come Friday Night. You want to talk about beating up Rheagar, and Regulator. I've been there, and done that too many times to count already. And beating both of them before the bell rings for their match, I did that already too! You have a bunch of (small) group of people who hang on every word you say, and you claim that you are gonna be the man who wins this triple threat, You Kevin, are nothing more than a rip off my friend. Hell, the only thing you didn't try to steal (besides my followers, charisma, in ring talent, and general likability) is my Picture That catch phrase. Now don't get me wrong Kevin, I can understand you needing a role model, and hero to aspire to be like, but the fact of the matter is that that there is no way in hell that some filthy, greasy, grimy, exhaust huffing, held back three times in the second grade, asshat like you could ever equal one tenth of my greatness. So why don't you do both of us a favor, and get your own damn style, because imitation isn't the highest form of flattery, when it done by a jackass like you. If I were you Kev, I'd hop on that bike of yours, and run as far, and as fast as I could from the Mississippi Coast Coliseum. Because if you do show up this Friday, I will give you the beating of a life. One that not even your little boy band in leather pants can save you from. And after I'm done with you, the only wheels that are going to carry your ass out of the arena, are the ones on a stretcher! #F.U.S.O.C
This Friday night, live in front of a sold out crowd of MY followers, you two boys will learn first hand exactly why there is no such thing as better than Perfect. Because i am going to tear thru you, and every other rat bastard, son of a bitch who John Conning, and the rest of the board of directors,give the unfortunate situation,of having to go one on one with the greatest professional athlete to ever lace up a pair of boots. the Twitter Trendsetter, The Instagram Icon, the #Hero to million upon millions of people from each and every corner of the globe. The Destiny of Dynasty, the Brightest Burning star that EAW will ever know, and most importantly, the future New Breed Champion (whether anyone in the back likes it or not), "PIcture Perfect" Mark Michaels! You dont have to like, but that just the way it is, #PictureThat#InDaBag#Dynasty#EAW"
"For those of you who don't know, Esse Quam Videri is the state motto of North Carolina. And what a fitting motto it is, because this Friday night, we separate what is, from what seems to be. See to a lot of my haters out there, BTW nice to see you checking out my profile ;-), will tend to say things like; I can't wrestle, I'm not on their level, they beat off guys who were world champions yadda yadda yadda. But the fact is whenever those bastards find enough balls to step in the ring with me, they get their asses kicked! Don't believe me, just ask everyone who watched Dynasty two weeks ago. They'll tell you that I'm not just some joker who strolled in off the street (that's Angelo Brando), and whats more, they'll tell you that I should rightfully be the National Elite Champion. But for whatever reason, one hater in particular has just chosen to be blinded by his sudden, onset, case of Michaels envy, that he thinks that I'm just going to lay down and die after he sucker punches me. Well guess what Zacky, I'm still standing. Just like I was after dealing with Angelo, Regulator, Tig, and so many others. I'm more than what I seem (I know, I thought it was impossible too) so just try to come at me bro!
But after I heard you ranting, and raving about me, with all that B.S. about how my status updates pointless, and my videos are crap, I know that you won't because it's become painfully clear; that you're a man who can only seem ,because he could never be. You like to seem like a bad ass who ran thru the so called 'best that Dynasty had to offer', but make no mistake about it; if it wasn't for guys like Alex Anderson, or those dozen idiots in BDSM gear who used to follow you around, you would've been jockeying a register at McDonald's where you belong (I mean all that grease in your hair just makes me think deep fryer). After hearing This whole pot and kettle routine of yours, I guess 'Jackass of the week' just wasn't enough for you huh? Well then I 'm sure you'll be pleased to know, that you're already nominated for 'biggest jackass of 2016'.
You have no respect for me huh? Well that's fine because no one could give two shits about what you think. You say I'm nothing more than a clown, well I say you're nothing more than a joke that goes; who has two thumbs and is going to get Mark Michaels' boot rammed up his ass? Zack Crash! Oh and about wanting to make out with me, I don't usually kiss jackasses, but if you take a number, and get in line, then you can go right ahead and kiss my ass! Now I will give you one thing, I do think Dynasty would be better off being called the Mark Michaels show, but that's a discussion better left for the people who actually have the power to do so (in other words, not you).
Live on Dynasty, you are in store for an A-list ass whipping, the likes of which you will never forget. Courtesy of The Instagram Icon, The Twitter Trendsetter, the #Hero whose millions, upon millions of followers are going to be tweeting pics of you staring up at the lights for days. Hell Zack, you might even get turned into a MEME and become slightly relevant in EAW again.
It all goes down in 48 hours (kinda like your mom), live at the Time Warner cable arena, I prove just why I am the Brightest burning star that EAW will ever know, I prove that I am the Perfect Athlete, and Entertainer rolled into one, and most of all, I will once again prove that no matter how hard you hate, no matter who you've beaten, or how much of bad ass you pretend to be, there's is no such thing as better than Perfect, and that my friend is real! So you better start Picturing That Zacky." #Dynasty#EAW#BurningCrash#InTheBag
@TrentYoder take a good long look pal. This picture sums up the long and short of every single time we step into a ring together. no one, not you, not any member of the locker room, and not any of those haters who are going to be cheering for you just because much like you, it eats them alive to see someone who outclasses their back water, hick asses in every way possible, do as well as I have. I'm rich, I'm great looking, and I'm a self made man who has captured the hearts and minds of people from every corner of the globe. I'm saying this not to too my own horn, but for you to hopefully come to terms with your own pettiness. Because if not, it's only going to end up bad for you. Bad like how even when you try to sucker punch me, you the one who ends up staring at the lights. Bad, like how with the exception of one measly little fluke, I've beaten you in every match we've ever had. "
SRSly bro, think of T.J. on this one. With me guiding him, he'll go to the right places, meet the right people, wear the right clothes, and with time, people will forget that you're his father, and the sky will be the limit with whatever path he chooses in life. That's the kind of life I can give him. But let's say you show up this Monday night, firstly your in line for the biggest ass whipping the world has ever seen, because as much as i would love to stretch this match out, and pound you into oblivion, I've got a bigger fish to fry. So I"ll be finishing you off quick (But not so quick that I won"t enjoy seeing you squirm a little). And if by some odd stroke of blind luck you are able to to get one more fluke, it's ultimately your son who will end up paying in the long run. This Monday night I prove yet again that I am better than you in each, and every feasible way you can compare us, whether it's money, or fame, or who dresses better, or in ring skill, I win every time hands down!
This Monday Night I will prove yet again that You could never compare to someone who is as perfect as me, whether it's fame, or fortune, or who dresses better, and most obviously who is better in the ring, I win each and every time, hands down! And once I get through with you, I'm going to turn around and do the exact same thing to that Pudgy, punch drunk, Irish nobody Tig Kelly, and liberate the National Elite Championship form his sweaty, Jameson filled waist, much like I liberated T.J. from your jealous, envious, Hater-aid guzzling, ass!
And everything I do (or I'm about to do) only further demonstrates exactly why I am the Destiny of Dynasty, the Brightest Burning star that EAW will ever know, the Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #HERO, and most importantly The undisputed Social Media Champion. As well as the fact that I am single greatest athlete who has ever laced up a pair of boots (Which BTW will be leaving a permanent dent in your ass) and the only man in the entire wrestling world who has earned the right to be called Perfect! So be ready to say goodbye to T.J., because after the bell rings in Winter Park, he will officially belong to me, so Picture That!#BattleGround#Dynasty#EAW#InDaBag"
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