Welcome old members and new visitors, EAW is still going stronger than ever and now runs out of a new upgraded forum! Be sure to check us out over at http://www.eawnetwork.com
Elite Answers Wrestling
Welcome old members and new visitors, EAW is still going stronger than ever and now runs out of a new upgraded forum! Be sure to check us out over at http://www.eawnetwork.com
The Land of Elite
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| EAW IS LEAVING FORUMOTION. WE HAD A NICE RUN HERE FOR 4 YEARS BUT OUR NEW FORUM WEBSITE WILL BE RAN OUT OF THIS LINK: eawnetwork.comJOIN THERE TODAY |||||||||||||||||||||||| KEEP AN EYE OUT FOR FOR MAIN SITE, eawrestling.com FOR MAJOR CHANGES, INCLUDING A NEW DESIGN, UPDATED ARCHIVES AND MORE WITHIN THE COMING DAYS AND WEEKS |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
"About to hop on the plane to D.C. And wanted to get a few things off my chest before I have to switch to airplane mode. First as always big shout out to everyone who's following me, you guys are the absolute best. Second, would someone please tell @MrPureWrestling to take a couple of deep breaths, because he's coming off a bit confrontational. I could understand wanting to beat the guy with the French flag stuck up his ass all the way back to Paris, but when I gave Kelly a bit of advice, he seem to keep taking it the wrong way. First he says I'm underestimating him, and I remind him that's simply not the case. Then he talks up about the guys he's faced, and I remind him of LEGENDS I've shared the ring with. Then he mentions who he was in a battle royal for the number one contenders spot for the new breed championship, and I again reminded him that I've been there and back a few times over myself. And and so now he seems to be getting a bit on edge and taking about how one of us might be an arrogant ass who is gonna crumble as soon as the bell rings. listen Kelly, not only am I confident in my abilities as far as being a great ring technician, I'm confident in my strength, stamina, and over all durability because I've taken The best shots from the absolute best that have stepped into an EAW ring.
And like I'm sure you've learned by now, I'm not just a guy who hangs his hat on being just a good wrestler, or just a good brawler, no I pride myself on bringing a well rounded skill set every time I step thru that curtain. Cause when your match spills out to the floor and into the crowd, you're not gonna be trading headlocks. Likewise if your in an ironman match, you don't want to blow yourself up in the first five minutes by throwing every big move you have out of the starting gate. And that is the message I've been trying to convey to you Kelly. It's a damn fine job you've done in mastering the finer points of technique, but I'm telling you from firsthand experience, that all goes out the window when guys are getting out thru tables and getting smacked in the head with glass selfie sticks (Hi JJ). Do you kinda understand now, that while it's all well and good that you're mr. pure wrestling, you might want to work on becoming mr. I can do it all, because that's exactly what it's gonna take to survive in this company. Don't believe me, ask any of the guys who were one trick ponies and got put down quicker than a hiccup.
Now since I've mentioned guys who left I'll say this about myself. When I entered that match against the Mexican Samurai, i did so because I had something to prove to myself. We went to war that night and if it hadn't been for a low blow, who knows which way it could have gone? Now I respected the stipulation and walked away, but I was gonna be damned if I was gonna let that be the end of dream I had since I was six years old. I never slacked off Kelly, it even if I did think about this, how good must I be to get resigned and pick right back up where I left off? And what does that mean for you, a guy with a shit ton of potential who's on the rise here, when he has to face a motivated and hungry Mark Michaels? One who's ready to remind not just Dynasty, but all of EAW just why I am called Picture Perfect.
Kelly you want to grab yourself an Interwire title match, i say you better check yourself because it takes a man every ounce of his blood and sweat to even get his name in the conversation. You want to go toe to toe with Drake Jager, I say you better not overlook the guy standing right in front of you. Because he sure as hell isn't overlooking you buddy boy. You want call me arrogant, at least I've actually earned a few title matches in my time here. And I'm gonna show you just why Kelly. This Friday night mr. Pure Wrestling locks up with mr. Anything you can do I can do better. The man who's a twitter trendsetter, an Instagram icon, and a #Hero to good people who spent their hard earned money to come down and watch Dynasty live at the Verizon center. The people who with every like, every cheer, and every follow, help motivate me to push myself that extra mile needed to give that mother canucker a first class ride on the end of my shoe all the way back to Ontario. So Consider YOURSELF warned Kelly, cause ain't none of the other Mousketeers gonna be able to save you when that bell rings. It's just you and me, and just like I've been saying these past few days, let's see who can go hold for hold with who. Let's see whether it's the screen cracker or the Schmidt kick? The picture perfect or the noose? You or me? Who's gonna be the one that's gonna walk away with their hand raised high, and gonna take that long flight back home wondering where did they slip up? I tell you right now if your a gambling man, you'd best put your money on Mark Michaels. #Dynasty#ThisFriday#PictureThat"
"I do not consider myself a religious man, but this particular verse has always ringed true to me. Yes dark times do come, and sometimes you don't think you'll ever see past it, but if you hold out, and push thru all the disparity, and hardship you will bask in the light at the end of the tunnel. Now sure there are gonna be people who try to say that darkness is reality, or some other nonsense like that, but always remember that people who talk that kind of crap, they vanish along with The darkness when light begins to shine.
I know that @InsaneSavior Is right now thinking about every twisted and sucking thing he'd like to do in the ring. I know he's probably gathering together all of deviant minds who flock to him, and preparing them for some wicked purpose that I don't want to even try to imagine. Diemos and his old lady are two of the most demented weirdos that EAW has ever seen. But I'm telling you right now followers that as big and bad as they try to be, there is not a snowflake's chance in hell that they're gonna walk over me and the Mexican Samurai this Sunday night, because the light that shines bright, always sends the darkness running back home to momma, and the brightest burning stars in EAW today are myself and Mexi.
That's Mr. & Mrs. Diemos, you are about to go toe to toe with the two guys on the EAW roster that nobody wants to be matched up against. The two guys that have every last person in that arena chanting for them from the pre-show all the way to the final bell. The two guys who are gonna have every last man, woman, and child on their feet inside the Rupp Arena on their feet this Sunday.
Now Diemos, I know your going to spout some bull crap about how you're either A. Beat me and mexi this Sunday, or B. Squeal like a pig about how Deliverance is your pick for the greatest movie of all time. In either case I'm going to show you just how wrong you are, because we've tangled before, I've taken your best shots, and you know what, I'm still here. So is most everyone else you've run your little boogie man stichk with, hell even though fried his ass more than those cheesy tots at burger king (guiltiest pleasure love that they’re back) Zack Crash is still hanging around, so this Sunday come at me bro, cause just like all the rest I’ll still be standing in the end.
And Alexis, I would never speak ill of a lady, thank god your nothing more than an emo chick who's watched a few too many Tim Burton movies. You're so dark and moody, and a bit bitchy, and you have this thing about children, your like an Angelina Jolie wannabe only with out the looks, or talent, or genuine creepiness that she had in her younger days. I mean I've been studying up on you, and from what I've seen, I'm am anything but impressed. Between Your long diatribes highlighted by bland insults, its no wonder why an incompetent oaf like Diemos put a ring in your finger. That bastard love child of Zack Galifianakis and the Pillbury doughboy, needs someone as unremarkable as you, to make him look remotely interesting by comparison. Seriously you are duller than a crayon that's been worn down to an itty bitty nub (you know like your bra size). Honey, you best know now that I’m not gonna take it easy ( #DoubleEntendre) on you, or any of your over hyped, under developed, Louisiana sewer swamp for brains having children, so better bring you’re a-Game cause you’re gonna need it.
This Sunday night you two interbreeding jackasses, face off with one of the baddest men to ever step foot in the ring, a man who can pound your face into mush with his fist, or snap a limb with his submissions. The former Interwire champion who believe you me is very worthy of all the success he’s had so far, and is deserving of even more, the man they call the Mexican Samurai.
And standing next to him will be the guy who’s always at the top of his game, the man who will give every last drop of blood, sweat, and tears to pull out a victory. The man who before the good people of Lexington, Kentucky is going to show you just why so many people have made him an Instagram Icon, a Twitter Trendsetter, and the hashtag Hero. The man who reps every last member of the EAW audience, each time he steps thru the curtain. The guy who they know is gonna give them their money’s worth whenever he’s on the card, and that is exactly what I am going to do this Sunday! Get ready Diemos, because even though you find strength in the darkness, Sunday night you are gonna be stepping into the ring with a white hot spotlight! And like I’ve Stated before the darkness will NEVER overcome the light. #Voltage#EAW#TagTeamGrandPrix#PictureThat!"
@PicPerfectMichaels:“Never have these words had so much meaning. See over the past week, hell over the past year really, we as a nation have been divided over ideals, over our past, present, and most definitely our future. Not that we haven’t been, but over the course of the past 12 + months, We’ve been divided seemingly more than ever, to the point of where it might tear us all apart for good! I’ve kept silent about these issues till now, mostly because I felt it was not my place to speak. There have already been enough people who have either shouted for joy at the results of what happened last Tuesday, or have shouted in anger over the same result. I wasn’t going to speak at all, until I found out that this week’s episode of Dynasty will take place in Louisville, Kentucky. It was then That I recalled Kentucky’s state motto. That Perfect Motto of United we stand, Divide we fall. Why you might be asking? Because it is a motto that I live my life by.
See I have said it before, and I will say it again, I am YOUR social media champion, and Every week I go out there and give my all to do each and every one of you proud! I do my damnedest to represent each and every man, woman, and child that may be watching Dynasty live in an arena, or catching the show as it airs on tv, or even reading a transcript of the show online, I go out there every week to entertain each and every one of you. So this Friday night, whether you’ve voted red or blue, regardless of who you are, or where you’re from, or where you work, or where you pray, or who you love. Whether it be sitting in the front row of the Freedom Arena, or your laying down on the couch, I am asking that you would all stand with me, because our unity is our greatest strength!
Together there is nothing we cannot accomplish! We can move mountains together, we can part seas. And as long as we all stand as one, nothing, not even the darkest depths can ever hope to overcome us! No, not even the pits of hell, are stronger than all of us combined. That is why this Friday night I ask that you all stand with me when I go one on one with Hades.
Now I know a few people are out there saying ‘Mark there’s no way you could ever hope to stand against a foe like Hades.’ And don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying it would be easy to. Hades is one of the strongest forces in EAW has ever known. Just take a look at his resume (go ahead and look it up, I’ll wait) And it’s plain to see that Hades has earned every last bit of his reputation. He’s won countless titles, and he’s been a nightmare that still haunts some elitist to this vary day. SURRIVING against Hades is a hard enough challenge, let alone winning the actual match. Make no mistake about it, I don’t dare underestimate Hades, but by the same token, Hades should not underestimate me. He may have the strength and size, But he sure as hell can’t match me in determination. The same determination that drove me since I was a kid to become a professional wrestler. The same determination that has brought me to the biggest wrestling promotion in the world, Elite Answers Wrestling! The same determination that has inspired me ask everyone, from every side of the spectrum, to let me prove myself as their Social Media Champion.
Hades has done it all in this business, but he has never faced anyone who was more willing to walk to hell and back to get a win. Friday night I’m asking Hades to bring his A-Game, because you know I’m bringing mine, and when the people of Louisville start cheering at the top of their lungs, and I’m talking feeling the ring shake from just how loud they’re gonna get, I am gonna be feeding off of every last one of them. Soaking up every last ounce of energy they send my way, I know that they will give me all the strength I need to get my hand raised.
And Hades if you happen to be reading this, just know that even though I respect you and everything you’ve accomplished here in EAW, this Friday night you are gonna see first hand just why so many people have gotten behind me on social media, turning me into a twitter trendsetter, and Instagram icon. You get to know why so many people the #Hero when mentioning me. It is because from bell to bell there is nobody who can go quite like Mark Michaels. No one will ever take everything you have to dish out, and still be standing wanting to go quite like me. No one will ever bring you to your absolute limit the way that I can. And whether you believe me or not, no one will ever make you wonder, what is it that I have to do to actually put this guy away like me.
For the love of god, can someone please tell @MexicanSamuraiJ, that 95% of those nerd references he dropped went over my head. The reason why is because while he was busy playing with his own joystick, I was busy getting laid in real life. so now that the fun and GAMES are over, let's get down to what really matters, this Monday night in Colorado Springs. Now you were able to put 2 & 2 together, and figured out that the reason I wanted to face you on Battleground, is because you are the holder of the EAW Interwire Championship, which means quite a bit in this company. Since you won that title, you've taken that next step in becoming a certified, first ballot hall of famer. And if I could ever expect to do the same, I have to be able to say that I'm at least as good as you are. But don't get it twisted, to say I've never faced anyone with your level of talent would be a bit of the stretch. Just ask guys like Mr. DEDEDE, Y2Impact, Zack Crash, Tig Kelly (I still want my rematch), and Lucian Black, and every last one of them will tell you that Mark Michaels is no push over. See I've taken every one of those great men, and pushed them to their limits inside the ring. So don't be surprised if beating your ass is just another day at the office to me, because I've gone to war with some of the undisputed best that EAW will ever know. But still the question lingers, like foul stench that fills the air. 'Can Mark Michaels win when everything is on the line?' that's what I need to prove, to everyone. Because while there might be some how are content to just meander around, and let the chips fall where they may, I refuse to allow my relevance in this company fall to some pencil pusher who wouldn't know the first thing about wrestling a match. I am taking my destiny into my own hands, and I will fight till the very last breath, to stay a member of the EAW roster.
So this Monday when we face off Mexi, do me a big favor, and bring your A-Game because I'm bringing mine. I want you at your absolute best when we face off, that way there'll be no excuses from who ever doesn't get their hand raised when that final bell rings. There'll be nothing held back in this one. Not a a submission, or suplex, nor a top rope risk that can change the tide of the match. This is everything, or nothing, and you better bet your ass that I'm coming to the World Arena for the former, and sure has hell not the latter.
This Monday night, I am going to show you exactly why my in ring preformances have led to me being called The Twitter Trendsetter, the Instagram Icon, the #Hero to millions of people from all around the world. These people have humbled me but always voicing their support, and even going so far as to call me their Social Media Champion. I owe them so much, that's why win, lose, or draw this match is for them. And if this is the last time they see the bastion of Battleground, then I promise that they will get a show, like nothing they've ever seen before. And when all is said and done, they can say that they got to see the Brightest Burning Star that EAW will ever know, put on the match of a life time.
"Just got this DM'd to me from one of my biggest fans. #Thankful."
(The video opens with a montage of shots, first some of Michael's getting his photo for match cards taken)
"I"m So fancy, you already know, I'm in the fast lane, from L.A., to Tokyo."
(*Cut to shots of Michaels warming up before his match, slipping on his ring vest)
"I'm so fancy, can't you taste this gold, remember my name..."
(Cut to a shot of Michaels backstage at the gorilla position, stepping thru the entrance curtain.)
"... Bout to Blow."
( The cuts become more rapid, a new scene for almost every chord change. shots of Michaels walking down the entrance ramp, mouthing words to the crowd, connnecting with the discuss punch.)
"Two, three, four. First things first, I'm the realest, drop this, and let the whole world feel it."
(Michaels nailing a swinging neck breaker, a knee drop, and a discuss punch.)
"And I'm still in the murder business, I can hold you down like I'm giving lessons in physics."
(Michaels nailing several closthlines, and a fist drop. several close ups of his Million dollar grin.)
"If you want a bad trick like this, drop it low and pick it up like this. Cup of ace, cup of goose, cup of crys, High Heels, something worth a half a ticket on your wrist."
(Michaels using a selfie stick as a weapon against several different opponents)
"Take it all straight, never chase that."
(Michaels lounging in a nightclub with two beautiful models.)
"Rooftops like we bringing eighty eight back."
(Michaels with both a snap, and fisherman's suplex, and the DDT)
"Bring the hook in, where the base at?"
(Michaels getting his hand raised by a referee.)
"Champagne spilling, you should taste that"
(Scenes from several Michaels promos)
"I'm so fancy, you already know. I'm in the fast lane, from L.A. to Tokyo. I'm so fancy, can't you taste this gold? Remember my name, bout to blow."
(Michaels getting busted open by Trent Yoder, Diamond Cuttered off a ladder, walking back up the ramp with a disapointed look on his face.)
"Baby I do this, I thought that you knew this. Can't stand no haters, and honest the truth is."
(Michaels with a double under hook back breaker, and the satio suplex)
"That my flow hypnotic, each beat it departed. Swagger so stupid I can't shop in no department."
(Michaels with figure four leg locks on several different opponents)
"To get my money on time, if they not money decline. I swear I meant that there so much I'll give that line a rewind."
(Michaels with the reverse DDT neck breaker, a stiff clothesline, and a shot of him mocking his opponent in the ring)
"To get my money on time, if they not money decline. I just can't worry about no haters, gotta stay on my grind. Now tell me who that, who that? That do that, do that? put that paper over all I though you knew that, knew that."
(Michaels checking himself out with his camera phone.)
I be the M-A-D-D-Y, put my name in bold. I've been working up in here,with some change to throw."
(The guitar's rythem keeps up in the background, as we cut the scene from Michaels house.)
Michaels: "I have to prove this to everyone, even myself. If I can't beat Mexican Samurai, I don't belong in EAW."
(The vocals pick bak up, as we see shots of Michaels hitting the spinebuster, and the second rope leg drop.)
"Crash the hotel! We party on till the break of dawn. Make the Phone call. Feels so good getting what I want."
(Michaels connecting with the Picture perfect, and the screen cracker.)
"Yeah keep on turning it up, chandelier swinging we don't give a what. Film star, yeah I'm deluxe, classic expensive. You don't get to touch."
(shots of Michaels celebrating a win.)
"I'm so fancy, you already know, I'm in the fast lane, from L.A. to Tokyo. I'm so fancy, can't you taste this gold? Remember my name bout to blow."
(an echo of Michaels word's, as the video nears it's con conclusion.)
Michaels: "It's all, or nothing, somethings gotta give."
"This just about sums up my feelings about @DustinBranch & @KevinHunter. The only thing worst than having to deal with those two jackasses... again, is the fact that I have to do it in this backwoods town that's stuffed to the gills with dumbass, ignorant, redneck, haters, who think that 5 mbps is great internet speed #SMH. How does anyone expect a man of my standing, to tolerate being stuck in this town that must actually be the eighth circle of hell. If it wasn't for the fact that the number one contender for the New Breed championship will be determined in my Triple threat match, I'd have phoned in sick, that's how bad it is out here. Someone remind me to never work this town again. But at least being stuck here wont be in vain. For it is here in this lowly city, that I will correct a egregious error. Because here in bumfuck... I mean Biloxi, Mississippi, that I am going to kick the ever living shit out two of EAW's biggest piles of dog droppings.
First off there's Dustin Brasch,Professional Wrestling's answer to almond milk. A man who is so dull, bland, and boring, you'd find it more entertaining to watch paint dry. But you know what makes it worst? The undeniable fact that Dustin just can't cut it in the big matches. Oh sure, he was the last man standing in that Hell's Warpath, but who did he beat to win that match again? It sure as hell wasn't me, because that meth mouth smelling bastard Hunter, sucker punched me from behind, and screwed me out of winning. But if whoever reading this is just some head in the sand hater in denial of my greatness, then how about some more proof of Dustin being a fluke, I mean just look what happened to him after Rising Tide. He's been showing his true colors, and getting his ass kicked by Dynasty's A-list. And this Friday nigh, he steps into the ring with the man, whose name is at the top of that list. Dustin has failed to learn from his recent history, and even if he did, he's still doomed to repeat it. Because once again, live in front of the entire Dynasty audience, I'm going to leave him flat on his back, and staring up at the lights. #Guaranteed
And don't worry about me over looking you Kevin, someone linked me that cute video you and all the other members of the lollipop guild, and I'll be sure to remember it come Friday Night. You want to talk about beating up Rheagar, and Regulator. I've been there, and done that too many times to count already. And beating both of them before the bell rings for their match, I did that already too! You have a bunch of (small) group of people who hang on every word you say, and you claim that you are gonna be the man who wins this triple threat, You Kevin, are nothing more than a rip off my friend. Hell, the only thing you didn't try to steal (besides my followers, charisma, in ring talent, and general likability) is my Picture That catch phrase. Now don't get me wrong Kevin, I can understand you needing a role model, and hero to aspire to be like, but the fact of the matter is that that there is no way in hell that some filthy, greasy, grimy, exhaust huffing, held back three times in the second grade, asshat like you could ever equal one tenth of my greatness. So why don't you do both of us a favor, and get your own damn style, because imitation isn't the highest form of flattery, when it done by a jackass like you. If I were you Kev, I'd hop on that bike of yours, and run as far, and as fast as I could from the Mississippi Coast Coliseum. Because if you do show up this Friday, I will give you the beating of a life. One that not even your little boy band in leather pants can save you from. And after I'm done with you, the only wheels that are going to carry your ass out of the arena, are the ones on a stretcher! #F.U.S.O.C
This Friday night, live in front of a sold out crowd of MY followers, you two boys will learn first hand exactly why there is no such thing as better than Perfect. Because i am going to tear thru you, and every other rat bastard, son of a bitch who John Conning, and the rest of the board of directors,give the unfortunate situation,of having to go one on one with the greatest professional athlete to ever lace up a pair of boots. the Twitter Trendsetter, The Instagram Icon, the #Hero to million upon millions of people from each and every corner of the globe. The Destiny of Dynasty, the Brightest Burning star that EAW will ever know, and most importantly, the future New Breed Champion (whether anyone in the back likes it or not), "PIcture Perfect" Mark Michaels! You dont have to like, but that just the way it is, #PictureThat#InDaBag#Dynasty#EAW"
"Fifteen minutes. That's how long I have to wait to go out in front of all my followers. Thousands of whom have traveled to dump they call Your, Pennsylvania, and millions more who will be firing up their televisions, and tuning in to Battleground. #SoCloseYetSoFar. Now I was think about sharing my thoughts about Fighting Spirt 2 (Check it out after battleground) But before I do, I wanted to take this time to make set the record straight for all of my haters; who might be getting carried away with with the thought that I won't be the one who gets his hand raised tonight! See as much as guys like Terry Chambers, Rex McAlistar, Daniel Marshall, and the countless other jackasses who couldn't scrounge up enough to equal half a brain cell between them, would like to think that I'm just some pretty face (which admittedly I am better looking than any other member across all three of EAW's brands) but they tend to over look the fact that there isn't another wrestler in this company who could ever compare to me.
Sure @DanielMarshall can pretend that he isn't a total rip off, but everyone knows who's the single greatest professional athlete to ever lace up a pair of boots. He can delude himself into thinking that he's the suplex master (or whatever he calls himself) but we know that there is only one man who has the Perfect combination of in ring skill, Amazing look, and unmeasurable charisma. So in just a few short minutes, he'd best to be prepared for a Grade A, except no substitutes, ain't nothing like the real thing, ass kicking, courtesy of yours truly. I can't wait till I'm done humiliating that off brand asshole, and collecting on a extra 20,000 bucks for my trouble #Win-Win
@TerryChambers You know what I can't stand? Bullshiters. And you Terry, are a bullshiter, plain and simple. See you come out here, and talk about who you're back in EAW because wrestling is you "Passion". But let's not kid ourselves here buddy, the only reason your overgrown ass is back, is because no casting director in their right mind, would ever be desperate enough to put you in whatever low rent, pile of horse crap that would end up straight to netflix. You talk about how you had a number one film, I say that you're role was kinda like your dick. It was so small, that if you blink, you missed it. So go ahead and brag some more Terry, because the more you build yourself up, the harder you are going to fall when you go toe to toe with EAW's true cross over star! Get ready to do what you do best Terry, make the real star of the show look good #StickToTheBackground.
And @RexMcAlister can you please keep any, and all comments to yourself. IT's not that I mind you looking like both a jackass, as well as a coward, but my followers keep telling me; that can't stand to hear; any more of the verbal diarrhea that spews from your mouth. Oh sure, you were nice enough to basically admit that I'm everything I'm advertised to be. But that doesn't change the fact that ran your mouth, and tried to slander my good name. Well that is something I'm not going to stand for pal. I'm going to make an example out of you Rex. I'm going to show everyone watch, what happens when you try to tarnish the image of Mark Michaels. I can't wait to pplant your head into the mat, and pin the next potential Interwire Champion. And furthermore by doing so, I will prove that without a shadow of a doubt prove that I am the psychical embodiment of Perfection, because like they always say, there is no such thing as better than Perfect! So keep on begging for mercy (not that it's going to do you any good) and while you're down on your knees; why don't you go ahead, pucker up, and kiss my ass!
In just minutes, all three of you overhyped, underdeveloped, hopless, piece of shit, clowns are going to get out classed, and embarrased by The Twitter Trendsetter, The Instagram Icon, The Hash tag Hero whose legion of followers from every corner of the earth, have declared him to be their undisputed Social Media Champion. The Bastion of Battleground, the Brightest Burning Star that EAW will ever know, and most importantly, the man who will without a shadow of a doubt; is about to become an extra twenty thousand dollars richer, Picter Perfect Mark Michaels! May the best man win (because I'm going to). #PictureThat#BattleGround#Monday#MNBG#InDaBag.
"Truer words have never been spoken than in this picture. It sums up everything thing I've ever had to say about my opponents. No, not just Tig Kelly, but every single last one of those jealous, envious, good for nothing, piles of dog crap that the world calls haters. Whether it has been Trent Yoder, Angelo Brando, J.J. Silva (BTW you owe me a new glass selfie stick), Regulator, or any other member of the locker room that has ever tried to make a name for themselves at my expense, I've overcome each and every one of those pathetic worms. Why? Because I am the single greatest athlete to ever step foot in a ring, that's why! I am the psychical embodiment of Perfection, and like I always say, there's is no such thing as better than Perfection!
But there are those who are propped up and placed on a pedestal, and have so much bullshit filling their heads, they actually think they can beat Extreme Answers Wrestling's biggest, and brightest burning star! Now in the case of my upcoming opponent Pig, Excuse me, Tig Kelly, I'll give him some credit in that he had a good year, what with beating an unprepared champion, getting thrown into an elimination chamber match because they needed another guy, and being over hyped to the point that it got him a few nominations at the EAW Award show this year. But one thing he really hasn't done, is take the absolute best, that The absolute best has to offer. You see, yes it is true that me and Tig have crossed paths a few times this year, and yes he lucked out not once, but twice against me! But he's never done it in a one on one match where he's had my undivided attention. Tig, it's a new day, hell it's a whole new year, and on January first the world will also see a new EAW National Elite Champion!
Now I know you like to think your a bad ass, but just because your father probably smacked you around whenever he was hitting the bottle, so basically everyday before noon, and your poor mother couldn't do anything except spread her legs like they were butter, doesn't make it so. Now judging from your typical Irish, it's easy to see that you grew up with some anger issues, but then one day you saw your first wrestling match and said to yourself,I wonder if becoming a champion in professional wrestling will get me laid? Usually it would but your so fucking hideous that no amount of gold will ever get a woman to sleep with you.
But hey look at the bright side, You get to be a crucial part of Mark Michaels' history. Yes, when I pin you one, two, three, in the middle of the ring, you will forever be known as the man that Mark Michaels beat to capture his first piece of championship gold in EAW. And what a day it is going to be, I can almost see all the likes, and retweets that my followers will be giving me. Oh what's that TIg? No one would ever be caught dead following your punch drunk ass on social media? Oh well, I guess it just keeps sucking to be you boyo.
And for all my followers in Forth Worth, I know it's been miserable living in that hell hole, but just know that in 48 hours your Social Media Champion (and the President of his social media team T.J. Yoder Michaels) will arrive in time for you to bask in the glory of him beating that ugly Irish bastard, and in doing so, become a champion who you can be proud to have representing you. A champion who is a Twitter Trendsetter, an Instagram Icon, The Destiny of the Dynasty brand, and the face of professional wrestling. And I owe some of it to you, my millions upon millions of followers. You weren't deceived by all of those jackasses who ran their mouths before, just like you're not fooled by some dumb irish asshole who's so full of himself that he's beginning to look bloated! I #ThankYou for all the support you have given me, and for making me the man i am today. Or to be more exact, the man I will be after this Friday night. #InDaBag#BeatTig#NextNEchamp#PictureTHAT"
We open on the set of "The Last Word with Zackary Cooper" just as the show is coming back from commercial.
Cooper: "Welcome back, UFC Women's Bantamweight champion Holly Holm will join us in just a bit, but before we get to her, we have some news coming from the world of Professional Wrestling. Many of you know that it was just days ago that Dynasty Superstar Mark Michaels attacked Trent Yoder, and then proceeded to abduct his seven year old child. Michaels hasn't been heard from since the incident, until now. Michaels has chosen to break his silence on this issue exclusively on this show. In a press release Via his agent, Michaels is quoted saying..."
Cut to a plain background with the text Michaels' statement appearing as Cooper reads them out loud.
"It has come to my attention that many of the general public (Including some of my more ignorant followers) have been deceived by the false accusations that have been lobbed at me by Trent Yoder. It comes as no surprise to me that someone who is self absorbed, and desperate for any kind of attention the way Trent is, would try to slander my good name by claiming that I had committed the act of child abduction. It is in my opinion that Trent is both Mentally unstable, and possibly having issues with substance abuse, as evident when he attacked me last Friday night. Without a doubt this was the action of a deranged individual, who became insatiably jealous when he realized that his son preferred me as a wrestler. And furthermore seeing just how unstable Trent actually is, and just how truly defenseless his wife is to stop him when his temper gets the best of him, I quickly escorted little... Yoder, out the American Airlines Arena for his own protection. The child is currently residing with me, he is well cared for, and will be with me for my upcoming match on November 20th against Donny Diamond, live on Dynasty.
Now in the event that Trent Yoder should find himself in Albuquerque this Friday, I would be happy to help stage an intervention after my match, so as to help Trent get the help he so desperately needs, not for his sake, but for the sake of my number one, new follower, His Son. Yes even though Trent and myself have had our differences in the past, I am willing to let that go, for the benefit of his family, because what type of role model to Little Yoder would I be if I wouldn't?
Now as it pertains to the rest of the world, I implore you to no believe the outright lies that have been told, and I ask that you would continue to support me, not only as your Social Media Champion, but as the Destiny Of Dynasty, The Face of EAW, and as the Brightest Burning Crossover star, that the sport of Professional Wrestling has ever known. #FreeMichaels#NotDeceived#PictureThat"
Cut back to Zackary
Cooper: "We'd like at this time now, to ask you at home watching to discuss this on our social media page on twitter, as well as facebook. Please share your thought on whether you believe Mark Michaels when he says that he is the victim, and that he is simply acting in defense of a seven year old child, against an abusive father. Stick around folk, because when we come back, Holly Holm will be here with us live!"
The camera pans across the studio as the house band plays a lively instrumental that takes us to commercial.
"You Know something Followers, it seems that being a hater seems to be a spreading like a virus in the Dynasty locker room. I mean just when I think I've seen the bottom of the loud mouth, asshole barrel. Someone else chimes in, and shows me that we can sink even farther. @Regulator what's up with all the Homo this, Fake ass that? Is this all a plea for attention? Or are you just realizing now that things have changed since you were last seen getting your ass handed to you? For your infomation I'm not Bret Michaels, even though your girl has been talking dirty to me, for nothing but a good time. What I am however, is the man who has made Dynast the number one Wrestling program in all the world. The man who has filled arenas all across the land with his followers. The man who is unquestionably, Dynasty's brightest burning star, Picture Perfect Mark Michaels. Now Reg I've heard You running your mouth about how your a shark, well if your a shark than I'm chief Brody, so this Friday night go ah and smile you son of a bitch! Bring your A-game this Friday, And I promise you that I will still send your right back to whatever hole you crawled out of, and end this little comeback tour. Quit living in the past, because the you are looking at the destiny of Dynasty my friend.
Oh and Angelo, I wonder who you're trying to fool with that long, ranting, rumbling, tirade? I know it's not me, or my millions upon millions of followers across social media, I know it's not anyone who's involved in our match this Friday, and I know it's not the guy you probably paid to type up all that crap! No, my best guess is that you're only fooling yourself. I mean come on, you a trendsetter? Me a wanna be Angelo Brando? Answer me this, If I was only trying to be a rip off of you, then why am I not hiding behind a shit ton of bottom feeding, blood sucking, yes men. I'll tell you why, because no one wants to be a guy who's only accomplishment in life, is that his father greased a few palms to let his son play professional wrestler. you're not an athlete, you're an asshole pretending to be one.
That's why you couldn't bring yourself to accept the challenge I gave you last week. You know you simply could not compete against a man who is not only the perfect athlete, but is also the perfect face, and the perfect body. So you ran and hid behind your two bottom bitches, who showed more balls than you did when they ran in to protect your ass. You say your dangerous? I say prove it. Because the way things are looking now, your best chance to win in this four corners match is to hope some one accidently gets poked in the eyes with your over-gelled hair. It's sad really to think that we could have friends. Instead you refused to admit which one is the more talented between us, so now I simply have to go out there and show you, and your little entourage who is, by simply beating you ass one two, three in the middle of the ring.
Now Yes I may not have quite as much money as you do, but at least I earned what I have. I've had to dig scratch and claw my way to reach the top of social media, and become the true celebrity of Dynasty. while you just sat back and had everything hand to you on a silver platter. Let me tell you something jack I've worked too hard to be compared to a man who is the literal personification of nobody. Don't believe me? let me explain, see you talk about how your family has been wealthy for generations, But if you take away your granddaddy finding a winning lotto ticket, what exactly would you, yourself be Angelo? The Answer is nothing and nobody. Because nothing that you have, is truely yours. Not your money, not your influence, hell not even the people you call friends. Everything about you, is simply a product of someone else writing a check. Meanwhile, I stand ready to take my rightful place as the face of professional wrestling, knowing that I have it takes to accomplish whatever I set my mind to, and what's more I know I can fight just as hard to keep all that I collect. So this Friday night Angelo, why don't you come down to the ring, and I'll show you exactly why I am everything I say I am, if you're man enough that is.
And @TrentYoder don't think that I've overlooked you. Trent we've done this little song and dance before so there's no real reason to bring up the fact that you absolutely can not beat me. Nor do I have to bring up the fact that I'll be whipping your ass all over the Kemper Arena this Friday night. No, all I want to say to you is, try not to completely suck out there. My followers like it when my opponents at least look competent. Not that you are, but just try to look like you are, but you wouldn't want to be out classed by a guy like Brando would you? Of course not, so get your shit together for this one, put on your pads, lace up your boots, shine your chrome dome head, and show the world, that for once you hung in with the big boys
This Friday #Dynasty we separate the men from the boys, The Fact from the fiction, and the world will get to see who is the unquestioned most popular, most talented, and hands down the single greatest professional wrestler alive today #Hint#ItsMe#InTheBag#PICTURETHAT"
"It's been a crazy out here in Anaheim the past few days, what with all my followers crowding around me on the streets, telling me I made their vacation to southern California worth money, and that they wished their kids would have been smart enough to want to see me live this Friday at the Honda Center, instead of paying to see some over grown rat and his buddies. No they waste their parents hard earned money on some dopey fantasy(Land) instead of coming to see someone they should truly idolize. Someone who they should all want be just like when they grow up, someone who's brand new There's No Such Thing As Better Than Perfect t-shirt is available on DynastyShop.com. They fail to see true greatness when they have the chance, just like my opponents this week.
Don't believe me? Well let's start with @CyrusCage. Here's a guy who has tons of confidence in himself and that's a good thing. The problem is I'm going to shatter that Confidence after I leave him lying , with nothing he can do other than stare up at the lights. Believe you me buddy, Confidence, and positive thinking, will get you all of Jack Shit when you step into the ring with an athlete like me (If such a thing existed because there is nobody like me) you might hail from The City Of Success, but come Friday you're going to be living on the boulevard of broken dreams. and while you're there you might want to find a place for your partner.
Speaking of whom, @A-Star your going to burn out in front of the whole wide world on live Dynasty. You like to fly around the ring, But I will make sure you land with a crash (not the Zack kind, the other, slightly less painful kind) After our match, you gonna learn that A Star can no shine, when it is next the bright, burning sun. My light will shine it's brightest and neither one of you, or that little emo in a mask @Phoenix is going to be able to do anything about it.
Oh yeah I'm talking about you sunshine, I know the reason you have to wear a mask in the dark. it's because your face is so hideous that if you where to so it on national TV, you'd get us canceled by the censors in a matter of seconds. Oh your dark, and creepy, but darkness always runs from the light (which is what you should do before our match)
you 3 chumps better know that this match is already #InTheBag even if I'm teaming with Trent Yoder and A-will. so #PictureThat boys."
Found a picture of Trent Yoder's mom. You can really see where he got his looks from. Yes you might be scary to look at, but we both know that you would grovel at my feet for my leftover scraps. I can't wait to show the whole world that barking like an ugly dog about how your going to hunt, and how insane you are, only gets you a trip to the vet to get neutered #SnipSnip
Michaelsfan88, PicPerfectfollower, and EarnCashEasy liked this.
PicPerfectMichaels Posted:
retweeting a selfie of Jaden Zaxaria. He can flap his gums all day about how he thinks he's entertaining, but if that true then I'm the other end of this photo #ImNot. he talks about being grateful just to be on the pre-show, that should tell you a lot about what he thinks of himself as a wrestler BTW Jaden you should be thanking me because you get to be apart of the biggest Dynasty pre-show of all time. All my followers are going to be watching & posting so try not to choke out there this Friday.
MMfangirl, 2M4lyfe, & GetMoreFollowersNow liked this
PicPerfectMichaels posted:
got a double set day today, one for Trent, one for Jaden. I going to be stepping in the ring with two of Dynasty's finest, guys who I'd love to be with when the time come to beat the hell out of Zack Crash, but they don't hold a candle to me. I work hard, I plan harder, and in that squared circle I am simply untouchable. so Jaden take off the headphones, and Trent try to focus, bring you best, because that is what it going to take to even think about competing with me. I 've got this match #In theBag #PictureThat
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