EAW Promoz! (Part 5 - Locked for posting...)

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Here you can write promos about shows, Extremist, Vixens, matches, or anything else in EAW. Please do not spam, or put pointless things that aren't promos and DO NOT CHALLENGE ANYONE and remember, THIS IS ALL FAKE AND STORYLINE so please do not take anything serious. Thank you.

ALL CARDS POSTED ON THE HOME PAGE OF THE FORUM!

What? Don’t want to throw hands?

Got nothing to say back to me? Tyler Parker and Tybull have my name more in their mouths than the guys I’m facing?

You’re all just going to duck me like that? Huh?

What am I exactly?

Am I the representation of everything you feel when you know you’re boxing above your weight class? Am I truth in front of propaganda? Am I the lone gunman that has a whole room scatter at the sound of his bullets decimating everything you observe in your sudden panic? I’m just asking, I wanna know why I make you all so nervous.

You know you got the people shook when they got so much to say about everything and everyone else that moves, but out of everything they do the only thing in response to you is them roleplaying about you wearing a gold chain. I’d say something about that representation of me, but nothing much is needed, same old shit, my people been dealing with thug representation whenever people don’t want to face what we got to say and hate the idea of us making people own up to their acts. It’s alright, you don’t want to talk about this place being built off extreme and you don’t want to talk about the shortfalls of elite matches that have caused nothing but a decline in the standards of matches actually having complete clear cut finishes with true winners and losers. You certainly don’t want to talk about Zack Crash being a tyrant who’d pull the plug on your careers at a moment’s notice. Some even want to pretend like we’re out to close down the company, as if someone like Y2Impact would decide to close down a house he helped build out of complete random. It’s a real joke, funnier than any stripping and Mexican parodies, the try hard efforts are so pathetic I find it hard to believe you’re being serious.

Then again, you know what you’re dealing with when you got someone throw around a thousand corny versions of your team’s name and thinks he’s edgy for saying someone’s birth name instead of his wrestling one, yet utters the term generic.

You know what you’re dealing with when a crazed mad man claims he was trained by an even bigger crazed mad man known who was known only for getting his butt whooped by another member of the J-Dynasty. Not to mention, being delusional.

You’re dealing with lost causes. Complete and utter lost causes. Highlighted by their lack of confidence.

Brett Kennedy and Pizza Boy look towards their foes hoping to pin one of us as a miracle to prove their worth. I look towards our opponents and think to myself I’ll put daggers in the whole team.

Press Conference

Syracuse, New York

September 24th, 2015

(Carlos and Mao are both shown sitting next to each other at a table with microphones and other recording devices. A giant “Territorial Invasion: Civil War” hangs in the background behind them. After a nervous glance from Mao, Carlos begins to speak.)

Carlos: I don’t believe I have to indicate how big of a moment this is for Dynasty Wrestling or myself in general. Or professional wrestling in general, might I add. EAW vs Dynasty in the War Games is something that many people have been clamoring for and it’s something that they’ll get. I am passingly familiar at least with all of the participants on either side. It was very frustrating to not have an opportunity to participate in the World Heavyweight Championship match that’s going to be taking place that evening. Be that as the case, I’m honored to have been chosen by the Dynasty brass and very much appreciate the recruitment efforts of EAW but I have been a member of the Dynasty Roster ever since I came back to EAW about 3 years ago. I look forward to competing in a hard-fought match and proving that Dynasty is without question the most superior brand of wrestling. I’m willing to answer your questions at this time.

(Carlos looks around intently at the various members of the press before one of them stands up.)

Interviewer: Carlos, what is your assessment of the EAW team that has been assembled to take you and your team on? Also, What are your feelings about your teammates on Team Dynasty?

Carlos: I’m very much familiar with all the members of the EAW Team except Rhaegar. I do know he’s a very intelligent, well-learned guy and a skilled wrestler. Hades is somebody that I’ve only had passing encounters with but I can tell you from personal experience he’s extremely strong. Former World Champion. Kevin and Oasis I’m pretty familiar with, especially KD. We go very far back in terms of being friends and stablemates but we have not had, at least I don’t believe, any confrontations as opponents. Crash is someone that I have gotten to know a little better over the last few weeks as an opponent and as a businessman. I was able to win the match that we had a couple of weeks ago, but I still maintain a very high degree of respect for him. As for my own team, I’ve wrestled against all of the participants. I know their strengths and weaknesses and can tell you that the weaknesses are very minimal. This is a team of champions, top contenders and future world champions.

Interviewer: You have been in various cage matches in your career. Elimination Chambers, Steel Dome, War Games matches. Do you think that this experience will help you on Saturday?
Carlos: A little. The main thing is that you’re used to the environment, used to the physicality. Matches inside cages and structures like that are pretty dangerous and taxing. You have to go in knowing that you’re going to have to pay the price, that you’re going to bleed. That you’re probably taking a significant amount of time out of your career. These matches leave a toll on the human body that me sitting down and trying to describe will not do justice.

Interviewer: Carlos, you say that you are loyal to team Dynasty in this case, but how can you be trusted? The last time that you were in a match of this nature, you turned your back on your compatriots in LEGION and then left them to face the opposition shorthanded. How can we be sure that you haven’t made a deal with EAW under the table?

Carlos: Hehh...you see, I never understand you media people. You always use past action as a predictor for future outcomes. All the time in sports you do this! I DON'T KNOW IF YOU PAID ATTENTION, BUT I WAS ESCORTED, RATHER FORCEFULLY MIND YOU, THROUGH A WOODEN TABLE BY HADES NOT LONG AGO! I’ve had the EAW Team Captain and Chairman threaten me on national television! What on earth would I be thinking teaming up with people who have caused me physical harm and THREATENED ME WITH MORE. I mean, honest to God, man…..it’s ridiculous and it pisses me off. You wanna talk about loyalty? When CWF was under siege by Project 411, I fought for the company. When a guy was trying to make himself a king in another federation, I fought for the company. Nevermind that I blindsided someone in LEGION that I had a severe problem with, but while Bane held nearly ALL of LEGION’s championships, guess who was the only person who was unaffiliated with a clique or stable that had a championship, that represented the company when it wasn’t cool to? ME. Who was on the stage standing with Lucian Black, going to war with EAW both on our own show and their programming. It was ME. I don’t think you or anyone else in this room has a right to talk to me about my record. When I pick a side, I stick with it.

Mao: Guys, please understand that this decision did not come easy for us. Carlos has still not been getting what we consider ideal treatment. People have offered us money and perks beyond imagination to side for their particular side in this conflict, but the main thing that we have asked for is a World Heavyweight Championship match. Do you know how frustrating it was to see Carlos go out and beat two of the best wrestlers in the world within a 24 hour period a couple of weeks ago and have absolutely nothing to show for it?! He beat Jacob Senn and Zach Crash both in the center of the ring, but it’s JACOB SENN who is included in that 4 way to crown the interim World Heavyweight Champion. That’s not something that we appreciated from Dynasty, but the thing is that EAW has offered us no assurances either. They invited us to their show to face Crash, but why not set up a match with Brian Daniels for the World Heavyweight Championship? It’s not secret that is what my client wants.

Interviewer: There have been some comments made about you by Scott Oasis and Rhaegar that seem to indicate that they lack respect for you. What does that make you feel?

Carlos: First of all, Scott Oasis has done nothing and never will do anything as a professional wrestler.I have done more UNDERACHIEVING in EAW than he’s done OVERACHIEVING. What has he ever done that I should fear him? In all fairness, I consider anything that he has to say peripheral chatter, nothing more. As for Rhaegar, I heard that he said something about me not being able to “rise up”. The main concern that the little face painted Greek needs to prepare himself for is my size 13 boot rising up and getting stuck up his ass. I don’t care what his background is, I don’t care about the failure of a brother he was sent to replace. THE CAGE IS MY HOME. I have done things to people inside steel structures that would have me tried for war crimes if done outside of the fighting arena. I am quite skilled and while I’m not as educated and cultured as Rhaegar purports himself to be, I would be MORE than happy to share my “culture” with him if he does not understand the direction I’m trying to forge for myself.

Interviewer: You’ve made no secret of your dealings with Zach Crash and the EAW side, what about Dynasty? What do you think of your experience there since it’s become it’s own entity?

Carlos: It’s been frustrating and at times rewarding. Regardless of what some of you people write and print, I love being there and competing on Dynasty Wrestling. I’ve had a chance to face many wrestlers that I may have not had an opportunity to otherwise. I don’t have many challenges or new experiences left in this stage of my career that have to be taken. While I’m frustrated that I have to continuously wait for an opportunity that people who have achieved far less than I have become World Champion, I have enjoyed going against many new and interesting opponents.

Interviewer: Are you going to watch the match between the group called Hexa-Gun and the other team captained by the Savage Ryans?

Carlos: No.

Interviewer: Do you care who wins?

Carlos: No. I don’t care for either side. I don’t like DDD, I don’t like the fatass he took under his wing, I don’t like the so-called “Extremist” movement that Hexa-Gun is employing. I don’t like Impact. I don’t like Heart Break Gal. I don’t like Pizza Boy. If I had any say in the matter, the ring would spontaneously combust and send every last individual involved in that match into the fiery depths of hell, never to be see nor heard from again. Does that paint a pretty detailed picture of how much I care?

Interviewer: One question not related to Territorial Invasion or your personal business...but how do you feel about the Empress of Elite tournament and what happened with it?

Carlos: It was a fine tournament. I watched the final and other matches throughout. It’s a shame that Dynasty doesn’t have a women’s division...I’d love to see what we could do to compete. I do think that it was a bit irresponsible and disappointing that HBG declined to participate considering her background, but with her being a part of this “Hexa-Gun” that must be expected. I’ve had a chance to talk to Aria Jaxon, the tournament winner. Quality young woman and a phenomenal talent. I think one day she may eclipse some of the things that people like Cameron Ella Ava have achieved.

Interviewer: Is there anything that causes you to feel concern going into War Games?

Carlos: No. I know my partners, I know most of my opponents. There is not a situation on earth that would make me fearful. The cage is my home as I’ve said before and I’m very unwelcoming to guests, especially guests like Oasis, who should know better after the beatings he’s received at my hands. KD understands that this isn’t personal when it comes to him. Nor do I have any ill will towards Crash in all honesty, despite his posturing and threatening tone of late. Hades….well that is another matter. If there are situations where I can take advantage and cause him a little bit extra harm, I would happily do so. I’m done answering questions, have a great day.

(Without another word, Carlos and Mao get up from the table and leave. Before he does leave, Carlos stares a moment at the Civil War poster, taking a look at Brian Daniels and Hades. Taking a lighter out of his pocket, he sets the poster on fire, lighting it at the heads of Daniels and Hades.)

This war has turned into more than just a battle that I enlisted into in order to protect the company I respect from the vile clutches of Crash’s vendetta against it, but now I have added to it a battle of respect from those who were our former peers. Now, I personally believe, that I have the respect of the Dynasty Wrestling locker room and those who I stand alongside with coming into War Games, but I don’t see a shred of that from the men I fight at War Games. I mean, at least the worst of the bunch actually has a modicum of that because of our war from two years ago, but the men that he has aligned with truly have no clue what they are in for! I mean, look at Mr. Scott Oasis over here, who has already throw his hat into the jar that states that he seems to want to see Dynasty Wrestling burn to ashes as he revels with the dance of the flames that cause it and what is his reasoning? For actually standing up to Crash only making that “Brand Survival Match” to take out Dynasty for his own selfish reasons, when we all know Lucian was about to wipe the floor with Norman and Hades? Posing as competition to actually make the lethargic and complacent Elite Answers Wrestling that continually rests on its laurels to now step their game up or lose its viewership to us?

That’s not even the worst of the accusations! Piggybacking off their work? What are you talking about, Oasis? You yourself are piggybacking off the work and arduous labor of great men with the likes CM Banks, Mr. DEDEDE, Robbie V, Hurricane Hawk, Y2Impact, Prince of Phenomenal, Dark Demon, Brian Daniels, Tyler Parker, and MYSELF! We busted our asses to make the best product as those before laid the foundation for me to be able to perform my craft at the best of my abilities and stun the audience as they watch with anticipation rolling off their eyes, I did the same for men like you to be able to do the same! Dynasty has been a cornerstone of EAW and the groundwork that you take for granted for as long as it can be remembered, even back in the Answers Wrestling Federation days where even I was not around! So you want to talk about piggybacking off of EAW, then you might as well say that EAW “piggybacked” off of AWF to get their own company. You also think that the fate of Dynasty Wrestling is in your hands if you are victorious? You actually believe that you have a say in what happens with Dynasty Wrestling if that happens? You have no power over Dynasty Wrestling, even if you and your team somehow miraculously survives War Games, the power lies with Zack Crash, not the rest of you. You are just a soldier in a grand war to Crash, fodder to be thrown out there until he is primed and ready to take the spoils for himself, not to actually get your own say in what the results and consequences are! If you truly believe in that, then you are just as ignorant as that locker room believes you are.

You also talked about my championship reign as if it was something I need to be ashamed about, Oasis. Maybe because someone else has yet to be become a world champion, so by slandering and defaming my own, you can paint yourself in the visage of being the “champion that Elite Answers Wrestling needs”, right? Let me tell you something, I beat BOTH of the current world champion in Brian Daniels and Devan Dubian to be the champion that I was! I CONQUERED The so-called Conqueror of the EAW Legends and Hall of Fame Champion Dark Demon in a bout for that title! At the end of it all too, Diamond Cage NEVER pinned or submitted me for that championship inside the Elimination Chamber if you had some brains in you and took a look back at the tape, Jamie O’Hara was the one who took me out with the assistance of Lannister, who both have gone on to do bigger and brighter things with their careers since then! In fact, how does it feel to know that the man that beat you for your Interwire Championship went up and left because he couldn’t handle the pressure of criticism? How does it feel to know that the man who beat you just tucked his tail between his legs and ran out of the company instead of defending his title to the bitter end LIKE A MAN! Exactly, doesn’t feel too good, does it? Before you want to step up to me, boy, and look down on my reign as a WORLD champion, you might as well self-reflect and take a look at how once upon a time, you were the intimidating beast that you were, but now are just a little pup that yips constantly to only get tossed aside by the bigger fish in the pond. I would definitely be worried when the time comes, because I will relish the chance I get to silence you once and for all with this boot of mine as I drive it to the back of your head for your childish jealousy!

Speaking of children, you talk about us being children, Rhaegar, when you are still dressing up in your Halloween costume from last year as some Spartan in 300? All you are is a pretender of the legends of the past and just like you, I will happily make you an artifact to be remembered. When they look over to your tombstone and read the epitaph that stands there, it will be blank because there will be nothing left but the story of how you failed when Elite Answers Wrestling needed you most! Trust me in knowing that Zack Crash won’t be too happy about that while he’s packing his bags and saying his goodbyes while making a trip to be on Dynasty Wrestling.

You stated that me being “The Fabled Conqueror” is ludicrous, but do you see me coming out every night like some Conan the Barbarian rip-off as if I was from 3000 B.C. or something stupid like that? No, because I’m a conqueror of the squared circle, not a man who walks around pretending he’s something that he’s not! You, on the other hand, Rhaegar are someone whose hypocrisy is evident as you dress around as a Spartan from a time that has been dead for ages! Sparta is no longer this field of gladiators and residents throwing their weak offspring down a steep cliff to oblivion! You didn’t pop out of some time machine to meet present-day and decide “You know what? I want to do that!”. You are just some person from Greece, or wherever you and Ventura came from, and wearing a mask to play around! Just like Ventura when he was “The Caster of Dreams” and wore the facade of this magician, you wear it just as well as some Spartan warrior that doesn’t exist anymore! I will not discredit your abilities in the ring, you do put up a fight, but at the end of the day, you are a fake and I will make sure Team Dynasty Wrestling weeds out the men who think we’re playing a game… to those who are ready for war!

Throw all your punches, Team EAW! Give us everything you have to offer because when the clock strikes and we all enter War Games with the full intention of making each other so broken, so beaten, that even the slightest movement will bring the most excruciating of pains! I am fully ready to put everything on the line to make sure that Zack Crash gets the punishment that he deserves, that Scott Oasis will be met with a serious understanding of his place, and that Rhaegar will have the reality check that he has been waiting for! War Games is not the game that the moniker suggests, and I don’t intend it to be looked as such, it is war at its finest and I intend to conquer it… along with Zack Crash and his four stooges who blindly follow him once and for all!

The scene begins with a poorly taped-on sheet of paper over the camera. As the camera focuses in on the sheet, the logo on the paper is a red pentagon with a tater tot in the middle. With the camera completely focused, the words on the paper read;

"The following is a paid advertisement by the Mexi-Fries"

The paper falls off, and the camera focuses in on a locker room, containing cardboard cut-outs of Y2Impact (donning a nice moustache) and the Heart Break Gal (wearing a sombrero). The cutouts start jumping around from side to side.

HBG: Ay, Dios Mio! Senor Crash has compiled up a team of cinco competitors to face us at the Territorial Invasions, and they seems like a mucho bunch! Whatever are we gonna do, YDosBurrito-man?!? AY, DIOS MIO!

Two arms reach around Y2Impact, with one of them holding a thesaurus. The arms open up the book and shuffle around the pages for a little while, before dropping the book and the arms moving back behind the cardboard cutout.

Y2Impact: Oh, Heart Break Girl. Do not fret about these five people. We must recollect our history here in the Elite Answers Wrestling promotion. It commenced in day one, when we signed our contracts and made each other exclusive to the company in 2008. Then, we had our debut matches, where we victoriously triumphed against a couple of former aptitudes and made ourselves famous. As we commenced doing our promo work, we commenced to get more bland and more boring per month. Sometimes, I have to recollect if I have an ounce of ingeniousness in my body, because everything I verbalize these days are so convoluted and long, that nobody fixates on them. But, no matter. We are both Hall of Famers, and we should not care about what they cerebrate. We made our own awful group, and went to war with Zack Crash. Most of these members are inferior to our ability, but even our ability is pretty deplorable...

Y2Impact continues rambling on for the next hour, going from Territorial Invasion, to the taste of nachos from Taco Bell, finally ending with how he smells in the shower.

Y2Impact: That is why I utilize my own body shampoo over the demons that is called the retail business.

HBG: AY, MUCHO GROUCHO! We will for sure beat the superior talent at the weekends. I love you, YDosBurritoman.

Another cardboard cutout jumps into the scene, as Drake Jaeger (rocking a full beard) shows up.

Jaeger: Oy, boss. How do I say my last name again? I keep forgetting the pronunciation of it.

Y2Impact: You cretin. The most facile thing you have to do is recollect your own last designation. For the 8000th time, it's 'faggot'. Trust me, the denotement to that is an astronomically immense bundle of sticks. Recollect who the guy with the thesaurus is...

Jaeger: Faggot? Gotcha, boss. Name's Drake Faggot.

Y2Impact: Now, is there any other reason why you perturb me with your presence?

Jaeger: N-no, boss. I'll get right on out. See ya, boss...

Jaeger's cardboard cutout gets thrown across the room, and out of sight. Afterwards, the cutouts of HBG and Y2Impact are jumping around, another cutout flies across the room and crashes to the side. After a few seconds, the cutout of Tiberius Jones (with a gold chain) jumps in.

Jones: Yo, boss. Have you seen the team that Crash managed to find? They's some tough bitches. I told you, we should have gotten those shanks my boys made for us.

Y2Impact: Tiberius, you require to subside for a second. I understand that Zack has compiled a team for Territorial Incursion, and they are better than us. But, we have to make them believe that we are the threat. We are the threat against this company and we will surmount. Now, take this purple soda and leave me.

Jones: You ain't holding anything there, boss...

Y2Impact: BEGONE, TIBERIUS!

Tiberius' cutout goes flying out of the scene, and the room is back to being just HBG and Y2Impact. Once again, the two jump around the room before sounds of thunder emit the room, and both cutouts start shaking.

Voice from above: HOW DARE YOU, Y2IMPACT! HOW DARE YOU!

Y2Impact: R-Rodrik! What are you yelling at me about? I have done everything that you have asked me to do...

Rodrik (voice): YOU HAVE DONE EVERYTHING...TO THE WRONG PERSON. I DID NOT ASK TO DO DAMAGE TO ZACK CRASH. I TOLD YOU TO PHYSICALLY HARM THE NEW MINISTRY, OUR SWORN ENEMIES!!!

Y2Impact: I hope you realize that they haven't been a team for quite a few months now.

Rodrik (voice): W-what...?

Y2Impact: I-I was jus-

Rodrik (voice): WHAT?!?

Y2Impact: I-I mean that they are still together, right HBG? Yeah, still together!

Rodrik (voice): Just as I thought. Now, since you dug up this hole at Territorial Invasion, I will need you to fix it as soon as possible without harming any of the Mexi-Fries.

Y2Impact: You're right, Rodrik. We are the inferior team, and we will most likely lose. Maybe we shall get the bollocks beaten out of us. I'm sorry for all of this.

After a brief moment of silence, the cutouts stop shaking and turn to each other, showing the thin layer of cardboard, and the men holding them.

Y2Impact: Now, where were we?

HBG: We were somewheres, boss? I thought you was angers and stuff and we weren't anywheres...

Just after she stops talking, the cutout of Y2Impact turns to the side, and an arm emerges, holding a small burrito. HBG turns to the camera.

HBG: Ay...D-Dios Mi-Mio...

The scene cuts to black, then to a picture of a censored bar for around 10 seconds, and again fades to black.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Like that little show I made, Plenty-Of-Farts? Oh, don't worry, Luzmala. Since this was a little 'racially themed', I had to remove you. Don't act like you were left out of anything, it was the network who said I couldn't do it. I had a clever idea, too. I was gonna put a mask over your mask, and give you an even worse Mexican accent.
Anyways, I'm pretty sure the Juicy-Juice is just laughing about this whole thing, not taking me seriously. I mean, why take me serious? I'm the weak link of the group with the worst win-loss record out of all of these guys, and 'losing miserably' according to Y2Thesaurus and its voice box, Y2Impact. As an added bonus, I'm the newest guy to the company, too. I mean, I don't have the accolades that DEDEDE has, and not even little ol' Pizza Boy, either. I'm just some 'run of the mill rookie who has no business being in a man's fight'. I don't know about you guys, but I have a feeling that something's gonna change come this Sunday.

We can talk about my 'journey' to Territorial Invasion, just so I can fill in more promo time and see what I've done from Midsummer Massacre to today, but I think everyone knows what I've been doing. Mostly, I've been resting. I mean, sure. I had that prospect tournament I was in, but the semi-final match didn't have me in it. I think it's safe to say that the winner of that thing will never legitimately be the 'top prospect' now since the whole thing has been screwed up. Oh, and don't forget the Interwire title saga. Yeah, thanks for that one month off, Crash. Really helped me out there.
Now, I can go out there, just like any other Canadian, and yell on a microphone 'You screwed me! I know it, the fans know it, even the guys in the locker room know that I was screwed' Yada yada bullcrap. Hell, I'll even add in the whole 'Best There Is' part, too. First off, though, if I mentioned anything about the locker room talent, I'd be talking out of my ass. Look at social media, I'm not particularly the most lovable guy out there. I'm definitely no 'real thing' as Shades Man said about us. Secondly, it's not anyone's fault but myself. I've come to realize that, and I'm content. I ain't gonna complain about the past anymore, because I've got a sort of 'job' to do for Zack Crash.

Yeah, I get it. I don't have the most impressive record. I have very few accolades. I ain't what you should really expect as a 'big time player in a big time match' at this point. The expectations of me are pretty low right now. Perhaps I should just... I dunno... bow out and save the misery, right? That's what the Perplexa-Cunts would love to hear, right? That means they have the advantage again, back to 5-on-4 action. Just like any faction in the history of the wrestling business, bigger numbers mean fight more aggressively. Well, I don't think I'm bowing out of this one. Sorry to burst your bubble, Drake Faggot.
You gotta understand the circumstance that I'm in here before saying 'Oh, Kennedy? Yeah, we'll take care of him easy'. Yeah, I look like the weakest guy out there, which means two things. I can shock this little group here and kick the ass of the competition, and win or lose...

I've got nothing to lose, and everything to gain!

Think about it for a second and drop the dictionary, oh so gracious leader of the Texa-Muffs. Even if you win this match, I go back to my regular schedule. Back to the mid-card, back to the Interwire scene...Chuck Scene, and back to mediocrity. Pretty much something you expect me to be for the entirety of my career. Well, just imagine what would happen if I even pin one of you ass-hats? My stock goes up, I'm no longer the 'mediocre talent' people call me. They'll still hate me, oh yeah, but they'll hate me for being the guy who pinned a Hall of Famer. 1. 2. 3.

You can plainly tell that I'm not doing this for Crash Course and his integrity. He's still a dumbass who doesn't know what the fans want. I'm not doing this for the Savage Ryan's either. Matter of fact, I don't know and quite frankly I don't care why any of these guys are in the match other than the fact that the Yeti-Lies attacked them and are now wanting their revenge. All that I know is that I'm in this for my own personal gain, and the opportunity to rip a thesaurus in half, just to watch the Burrito Man cry.

I don't know about you guys, but I've pretty much done my part. The 'weak link' did his end. Why don't we start thinking about Sunday, and we kick some Questa-Bunch ass? I expect some reply from the Mexi-Fries about how childish I am or how I'm a nobody. Some generic wrestling garbage that everyone basically does to reply to something. Oops, might have pissed off Karl again.

Ay, Dios Mio!

Yeah Matthew Berry? I have a very important question for you. Who am I? I'm uh your wife’s best friend’s aunt’s gynecologist. Look it doesn't matter I need your help. Listen it doesn't matter how I got your damn number, I need some advise. So my fantasy team already sucks and I can't afford to lose this week because I'm facing my good friend Jack in one of my many leagues and if he wins, he's going to be a lil shit about it. We don't want that. Fuck your ESPN appearance in three minutes, this is way more important. Yeah I don't like talking to you either. I wanted to talk to John Clayton because he's a damn professor but I settled for you. Alright so my team is suffering man. Dez gets poked in the ankle and he's gone for ten weeks, pussy. Alfred Morris is losing carries to what's his face? Matt Jones? Yeah I think that's it. Jimmy Graham doesn't get a target because his QB is a dwarf and last week I didn't start Tom Brady because you raved about the Bills defense and then he threw for 3 TD’s AND NEARLY 500 YARDS. I just need help with my flex for this week. No don't hang up! Quick! Joseph Randle, Lamar Miller, or Terrance Williams? So don't start Miller because he's questionable? Look the only thing that's questionable is your weekly rankings. Go with Williams? Ok that means I'm going with Randle, thanks. Wait do you know anything about EAW? Who you got, Team EAW or Team Dynasty? Hello? HELLO? Fuck.

Who are you and why are you pointing a camera at me?

Camera Man: I work for EAW.

Oh right I signed with them. Good stuff.

Camera Man: Tell us about yourself. Please don't be mean like Jack.

Oh don't worry, I'm a very humble man with an inspirational story to go with it. Hi my name is David Davidson. I'm an Aries so automatically I'm creative, adaptive, and insightful as fuck. Ladies can hit me up on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, MySpace that's right my sources are telling me it's making a comeback just like the flip phone….. see that Chris Broussard? I have BS sources as well. Oh also blackpeoplemeet.com but that's a story for another day.

Camera Man: What about your childhood? Usually new people talk about their roots!

Roots? Big fan of that band. They're doing big things with Jimmy Fallon. Ok so I grew up in Las Vegas. My mom was a stripper, my dad was a drunk, my dog got hit by a car, my teacher tried to touch me in my no-no place, and I was broke. I had to live on mayo sandwiches and sugar water. For a special treat my dad would go out and buy me a $1 McDouble once a year and it was like Christmas morning. Speaking of Christmas I never got presents. I would've looked under the tree if we had one in the first place. Santa’s not real. There I said it and don't gasp because a child shouldn't be listening to me right now because I'm not rated G, or PG, or PG-13….. which reminds me, that’s Paul George’s new nickname and I like the Pacers this year. Might bet on them to win a few games if Monta Ellis learns to pass the ball. Anyways I've had to scratch and claw my entire life. Not just one year of my life! Not even two! Or three or four or five or six or seven or eight or nine or ten or eleven or twelve or thirteen or fourteen or fifteen, not even sixteen! Or seventeen or eighteen or nineteen. Chillax I'm almost there. Or twenty or twenty-one or twenty-two, or twenty-three! But twenty-four. You know what else is twenty-four? It's Marshawn Lynch’s number and he got stuffed against the Rams and Packers defense! His performance cost me eight hundred bucks on Draft Kings.

Camera Man: Sorry you had a rough upbringing.

What? Oh I made that stuff up. I've always been pretty wealthy. My mom is a successful lawyer and my father owns a few casinos. As of a matter of fact, Jack’s and my dad work together.

Camera Man: Wait why did you lie?

Why are you alive? Why hasn't a bus hit you by now? How do you like it when I ask you questions? I thought camera men weren't even supposed to talk and I noticed you're not even focusing on my good side. The reason why I lied was because I wanted to fit in. Every single wrestler in EAW has this sad story about how their father abused them or how their mother was the neighborhood’s sex doll. Then they go on and talk about how wrestling saved their life. They say they've busted their ass for this business for years if not decades. You know where I've been this entire time when they've been putting their careers on the line/shaving years off their life? Sitting in a casino, sipping on some wine, while making more money in one night than they will in a year.

Camera Man: So everything was a lie? Even the story about your dog and teacher?

Oh the teacher story was real. I was 18 and she was a hot 25 year old Spanish teacher. That night she helped me roll my R’s if you know what I mean. Actually do you know what I mean? Has something to do with sex. No don't even open your mouth again. I'm skipping all these pointless questions and I’m going to talk about why Jack and I are here in the first place. You see we have been best friends since we were in diapers and we share a similar addiction and that's gambling. We are the best at it. We have about a 95% success rate. I don't want to echo the same words my friend said earlier today, but I will say this. The reason why we are in EAW is because there is an opportunity here. There is money to be made and there's nothing left to be said. You look at us and we aren't the biggest guys. We don't have the pro wrestling experience per se but what we do have is a fighting background. Even when we lose, we win. We hit jackpot after jackpot.

Camera Man: Do you actually think you can beat any of the skilled wrestlers in EAW?

Not only am I going to defeat every man they put in front of The High Rollers, but afterwards I'm going to go fuck his wife, force her to cook me breakfast in the morning, while wearing his robe of course and his kids will view me as their new and improved dad. Now pardon me.

EAW Promoz! (Part 5 - Locked for posting...) - Page 31 FESbMy9Q8qh1IqLO3--sszA2DJHR1ED3beoZVI-uA101eu_9s_exEWSpl54APRsqlqLLmwmi00Q_EeZ0hCZlkILGkep55q0yrfFvDniyRwaMJDXJ8vn46OS82zTpbBZP8TI=s1600

六 Drake Jaeger is shown dressed in his full ring gear, trench coat, sunglasses, gloves, and a toothpick in his mouth as he frustratingly paces back and forth in front of a large banner with the Hexa-gun logo on it at an unknown location. 六

Drake: Is this…. It? Is this what it’s come to? All my years in Mexico, nearly killing myself every night just to keep up with those cocaine-fueled spot-monkeys… All those years I spent in Japan, going there as an excuse to be closer to the Idols, the manga, and the anime, but having to deal with the so-called “wrestlers” and their “strong style” - trying to kick my Goddamn head off every night…. Like Christopher Columbus, I traveled far and wide until I was brought here, to the United States, home of Elite Answers Wrestling, but UNLIKE Christopher Columbus, I was too stupid to make slaves out of the people who inhabited wherever I landed! They could have dealt with this bullshit while I sat back and laughed, because this is nothing short of a joke! I’ve been standing here, staring deeply into an abyss! One where I’ll have to drive my ass all the way back to my disgusted home country of Canada, get out of the car, walk into an arena filled to the brim with a bunch of ungrateful pieces of shit that don’t deserve to watch what I can do in the ring, and beat the shit out of this sorry group of freaks that have the gall to oppose us! So this is it? This is all you’ve got on the table to offer? The only man who’s got a set of balls on him happens to be one that not long ago was struggling to deliver people their greasy pizzas in thirty minutes or less? Is this a joke? Is this a fucking joke? Am I being Punk’d? Is this Hell?

六 Drake finally stops pacing and tries to calm himself down; his back to the camera before slowly turning to face it. 六

Drake: First and foremost, I’d like to publicly thank Y2Impact and the Heart Break Gal. I’d like to thank them for having the sense to tear away from associating themselves with this company. Elite, Extreme, Enema - put any little word you want to represent the E, but changing the name of garbage doesn’t change the fact that it’s garbage. Garbage wrestling and garbage wrestlers pretending to be the real thing. WELL THEY’RE NOT THE REAL THING! I’M THE REAL THING! Y2IMPACT IS THE REAL THING! THE HEART BREAK GAL IS THE REAL THING! THE BURNED MAN IS THE REAL THING! LUZMALA IS THE REAL THING! TIBERIUS JONES IS THE REAL THING! HEXA-GUN IS REAL! So I’d like to truly, genuinely, thank Y2Impact and the Heart Break Gal for realizing that and taking such a step and recruiting the real thing to bring some sort of order to this land that’s inhabited by fakes and phonies that still probably swing at each other with pizza cutters and think because they have some vodka-chugging Russian running around with a “Pure Championship” that it makes them classy. You know what it means to be an “Extremist”, EAW? It means devoting EVERYTHING to something, and you… Each and every one of you, whatever your name is, whatever side you claim to be on, each and every one of you have proven you are no Extremist. Each and every single one of you - one way or another - have become complacent little dogs, whether you’re carrying a flag that says “EAW” or one that says “Dynasty”, and come Civil War, there’s gonna be a winner coming out of all this, and it ain’t gonna be either of you.

六 Drake takes the toothpick out of his mouth and flicks it at the camera as he laughs. 六

Drake: And how bold of me to make a statement like that, right? Who the fuck am I to make such a claim, eh? You know why I’m so sure of what I say? Because the man who’s the face of this company, any way you twist it, has stood back in the shadows and done nothing - NOTHING - while a guy who’s literally named “The Pizza Boy” fights his battle for him, his partner’s battle, Bert Kennedy’s battle, and Aren’s battle. It doesn’t take long to realize that a man by the stupid fucking name of Mr. DEDEDE has been THE name around here for the last 8 years. The torch-bearer, the hit-maker, the record-breaker, World Championships, Pain For Pride main events, hundreds and hundreds of names who’ve fallen to him! AND YET HE STANDS THERE WITHOUT A GODDAMN THING TO SAY! WITHOUT A SINGLE GODDAMN WORD TO SPEAK TO US! WITHOUT ONE OUNCE OF DEFENSE TO PROTECT HIMSELF FROM THIS ONSLAUGHT WHILE THIS PISSANT PIZZA BOY FIGHTS FOR HIM AND HIS FRIENDS!

SHUT YOUR MOUTH, DEDEDE! NO, SHUT IT! SHUT YOUR GODDAMN MOUTH! I SEE YOU WATCHING THIS, AND I SEE YOU OPENING YOUR MOUTH, SO SHUT IT, BECAUSE WHAT COMES OUT OF IT ISN’T GOING TO BE THE PROBLEM! IT’S ABOUT WHAT’S GOING IN IT, AND THAT’S MY BOOT IF YOU SO MUCH AS TRY TO SPIT OUT ANY SEMBLANCE OF WORDS NOW THAT THE SPOTLIGHT IS ON YOUR OLD, WITHERED, WORN-OUT ASS! SHUT THE FUCK UP!

六 Drake tries to calm himself again. 六

Drake: I’m…. I’m not going to play games with you gentlemen. You look like you came out of a circus, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to play games with you. I’m not gonna watch you fuck around and waste my time and try to entertain me before the inevitable comes. All of that fighting you’ve done up to this point, everything you’ve said up to this point, and everything all of you ever were and accomplished up until this point - it no longer matters. It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t. People aren’t gonna look back on the twenty-sixth of September, 2015, and think about anything Mr. DEDEDE, Bert Kennedy, Aren StupidRussianLastName, Mr. DEDEDE’s boyfriend, and The Pizza Boy accomplished. They’re going to live on in infamy as a group of sheep that was led to the greatest slaughter this company or any before or after, has or ever will have been seen before. We’re going to remind you and everyone else what Extreme is at Territorial Invasion - that’s our job. That’s our purpose here: kick ass, take names, be the TRUE incarnation of extreme. You? What’s YOUR job? Your job is to accept fate and regret every single decision you ever made that led you to us at Territorial Invasion. That’s your job. THAT’S! YOUR! JOB!

六 Drake storms off as the camera remains on the Hexa-gun banner for several seconds before finally fading to black. 六

Civil War Promo #2

The camera opens up on The Pizza Boy sitting in the gym in the dented up folding chair, his arms and legs crossed as he studies a television on an old AV tray. He watches on as he makes his decision at Showdown, swinging high on every member of Hexa-Gun, hopping with every swing, putting his entire body weight into his flailing steel assault. Suddenly, he rewinds the tape, stops just after the chair flies from his hand back to the Burned Man's hands, presses play, and watches himself question his next move. Suddenly he stops the tape, turns off the TV, and sits momentarily with a similar contemplative look on his face as he stares into the black abyss of the darkened screen, before turning to the camera man, hardly surprised by his presence.

PB: Doubt. You think there's doubt? There is no doubt. I made my choice long before you threw me a chair and asked me to do your dirty work for you. I have no doubt that DEDEDE will be a blowhard if we win, take all the credit, strut around like he owns the place. That's fine. As a matter of fact, being a cocky douche is one of Mr. DEDEDE's best qualities. I was trained by Tony frickin' Rolland, you don't think I KNOW the nature of Mr. DEDEDE? You think I'm unaware that this isn't his first rodeo in the realm of fighting for roster supremacy? I'm not doing it for him. I'm doing it for every fan who had a moment of doubt in their mind when you handed me that chair. The ones who booed, the ones who bought into the idea that The Pizza Boy Andrew Saunders could somehow sink so low as to align himself with soldiers of fortune. I'm doing this because I want a place to earn a paycheck at the end of the night. I'm doing this to rid this company of one of many cancers that it's currently suffering. I have no doubt that I'm a hail mary, a desperation move, a warm body to throw into the mix that's loyal enough to stake a claim in EAW's survival. Being a hero isn't about riches, spoils, and notoriety, it's about doing what's right in the face of the insurmountable. See, I'm not like you Mercenaries. I'm not some gun for hire with nothing to lose and everything to pillage. My cause doesn't come with a price tag, I expect to gain nothing from my role in this match, other than the self-satisfaction of doing what's right and giving those fans a reason to believe in this NYC dough boy again. I've watched Showdown over and over again, I've looked for this doubt in my eyes, Merc's, and I don't see it. I see fear, I see confusion, but I don't see my conscience wavering, I don't see my loyalty faltering, I don't see dollar signs flash in my pupils like some cartoon animal hitting the jackpot. I see a man whose hurt. Hurt that you, the crowd, anybody would think I'd sink to your level of greed and masturbatory smugness.

PB leans into the camera, locking eyes with the center of the lens with a sincere glint of betrayal in his eye.[/b]

PB: What's led you people to believe I'd sell out? Is it the incessant viral marketing I'm forced to do? Is it my posse at ringside? What? When have I not tried for you people? Even when you didn't believe, even when you saw me as a joke, when have I ever let you down? Have I not worked my body to it's breaking point? Have I not slain enough monsters? What? What makes you think I'm capable of being like them? These thugs who can't fight a clean fight or do their job without holding someone ransom for a treat? Like an untrained dog with a tennis ball having a milk bone waved in his face to give up their toy to continue a game of fetch? Is it the bowtie?

PB yanks off his bowtie and tosses it over his shoulder.

PB: It's gone. This corporate button up shirt?

PB pops off his shirt with one tug, snapping every button clear of the breast, sending them flying. He tosses it, too and starts removing his shoes.

PB: How 'bout these Vans? I figured they were nondescript enough as they were, but if they're what keep you from believing I wont sell my soul, they're gonezo.

Camera Man: Um...PB.

PB: How about these pants? They're khaki, no real brand visible on them, but they do look white collar don't they? How 'bout we ditch these, too, huh?

Camera Man: Andrew!

Just as The Pizza Boy starts dropping his drawers, revealing pepperoni polka dotted yellow boxers underneath, Tony rushes in and tackles him to the ground. Percy shows up and pulls PB's pants up as Tony clutches him tightly as he squirms to break free.

PB: Is that enough to prove to you that I can't be bought!? Is that enough to show Hexa-Gun that I have no pride invested in my heroism?! That I don't mind being just the 'fifth man', the 'extra body', the 'disposable little soldier'?! I'll have your flesh under my fingernails when it's all said and done, Hexa-Gun, and whether it's me who finds it when I'm grooming myself later or a morgue autopsy looking for forensics doesn't matter to me! I will do my part to make sure that you don't win this battle, regardless to who appreciates it, regardless to who believes in me, and regardless to if I even have a career after! Whether I'm a spare tire or a fifth wheel doesn't matter to me! This is my battle just as much as it is anybody else's under that EAW logo, and I'll teach you how much I count even it it means coming to this fight stark naked to erase your doubtful preconceptions of me and gain some respect! GET OFF OF ME!!!!

Suddenly, Barney M. Bailey slides into the foreground shot, blocking out PB as he tries to wrestle away from Tony and Percy. Barney shoves his fat dirty stogie toting hand into the camera's lens.

BMB: THIS INTERVIEW'S OVER! CUT THE CAMERA O-

Alright let me see what we got here. Antonio Brown is up against St. Louis this week? I'll take that 10 out of 10 times, twice on Sunday! Which I think I'll do, join another league, make more money, I'm so smart. Tyrod Taylor is up against Miami? He's cheap, I'll take...

*camera man* Hey Jack sorry to interrupt but do you have anything to say to EAW fans or any of the Wrestlers?

Huh? Oh yeah for sure man, but first, do you see what I'm doing?

*camera man* Umm setting up your team for fantasy football?

I am making money, I am doing what I do best, I'm putting all my trust in these guys to make me money. Putting my money on the line out of chance and luck, but not Andrew Luck because that might cost you, judging by what my Jets did to him. You don't fuck with Revis Island, or me for that matter. We are the same him and I, we are both the best at what we do. Do you see what I'm wearing Mr. Cameraman?

*camera man* Yeah a suit.

Da fuck you just say? A suit? Bitch! This is Armani. Like who the fuck are you?

*camera man* I'm the camera m...

That was a rhetorical question, but I'm glad to know you understand what your occupation is. But anyway, the point of me saying that was to show you that I mean business, and I'm very good at what I do. When I'm gambling, I'm in my zone, so don't you EEEVVVVVVVVVVVERRRRRRRRRR, interrupt me while I'm gambling, whether that be fantasy football, slots, craps, Blackjack, Roulette, don't you ever come up to me and ask me stupid ass questions. You got that? And the next time you do, I'll bet that I kick your ass. And by the way, to you? It's Mr. Ripley, or Sir.

*camera man* yes sir, I got it sir Sad

Very good, anyway, yes I'll address the people now. Hi, I'm Jack Ripley one of the newest extremists for EAW. My partner David Davidson and I are coming to EAW, and everyone should be frightened. Do we have any experience in the world of professional wrestling? Hell no. Do we give a shit? Again, hell no. You see to us fighting is fighting, and we have a lot of experience in that. We may have picked up a few moves from betting on all those MMA fights, boxing bouts, even on underground fights. Which not only did we bet on, we also participated in. Because while the thrill of betting on someone else to win is a huge rush, and satisfying when you were right, It's more of a sure thing when you do it yourself. And that's what we would do, bet on ourselves to win.. or lose in some scenarios and when we did, we'd make out great. It's hard to even call it gambling when you know you'll be winning that money. Fighting to us comes naturally, the world of gambling can get pretty shady so you learn how to fight your way out of situations real quick. See I've always been around the world of gambling, I know what I'm doing. Sometimes you have to bet against yourself, and take a dive, because sometimes you make more money when you do bet against yourself. My gambling roots go back all the way to my childhood. You see my father owned a little shack casino in Vegas. It wasn't big, but it was enough of a taste to get into it. Once you get a taste of the forbidden fruit you don't ever go back, and you always want more and more and more. I couldn't ever get enough, I took my gambling ways to school, and that's where I met my friend David Davidson lll... who was on the wrong end of a bad bet by his father. But we both had the love of gambling in our blood, so we would bet each other, trivial things, such as I bet you can't do a backflip... almost broke my neck on that one. I bet you can't jump that fence.. he almost broke his neck on that one. I bet you wont go ask that girl out.. Which I actually lost, because she asked me out before I had the chance, which wasn't in the parameters of the bet, so due to semantics I took the L. As we got older, the stakes got higher, horse races, boxing, UFC, MLB, NBA, NFL, Cock fights, even shitty NASCAR. Doesn't matter, if there is money to be had in it, we bet on it. And that's what brought us here, there's money in this, and we're going to get every single dollar out of this place that we can get. Oh and you know how I spoke of taking dives during underground fights? Yeah I look around this place, and I don't see a damn person I don't think I can beat. So taking dives here? Not likely. I'm way too slick, crafty, and tough. You grow up real fast participating in underground fighting rinks. They smarten you, and toughen you up so don't worry about me and David we got this on lock. So we'll see all you tag teams out there, and you can bet on that.

*camera man turns to leave* Thank you for your time Mr. Ripley

Hey wait before you go, David and I are going to start up a betting office for everyone in EAW if they want to make some money. It'll be set up somewhere within the confines of the EAW arena. It's a good way to make money, so stop on by and place your bets. We'll see ya soon.

A waste of time. There is nothing that pisses me off more than a waste of my time. You can imagine how I feel knowing that this entire month of GI Styles chasing after my belt has been a waste of time. Let’s take it all the way back to when I first started and declared my intentions on this National Elite Championship I hold. Around the same time, a man by the name of GI Styles made his long awaited return to EAW and everybody, myself included, waited with bated breath to see what kind of a man this new GI would be. But then everybody would quickly come to realize that this GI Styles would be lame as fuck.

This GI Styles lost to Maxwell Dachs mere weeks after returning. He made his grand return to Pay Per View to go to war with his old partner Carlos Rosso to finally settle the score regarding who was the better half of that team and while most thought GI was the better half of the team, Carlos proved that wrong on that night and look where his is now compared to GI Styles. Carlos is in the Main Event of Territorial Invasion on Team Dynasty, and is a highly coveted athlete by both prevalent sides of this war. GI on the other hand is an afterthought to this war. GI Styles is in the opening match, stuck with me. And this is why he’s apparently so angry, because he’s being looked over.

So instead of looking directly at the man responsible in the mirror, he decides to take it out on me. He decides to try and take back the National Elite Championship he once held because in GI Styles’ mind that’s his fallback. GI Styles is known as the longest reigning National Elite Champion in history and so he thinks that if he can recapture his old glory that everything will be okay, rather than coming to terms with the fact that he just doesn’t have what it takes to be in the main event of Dynasty Wrestling or EAW. He doesn’t want to come to terms with the fact that he isn’t as good as he thinks he is, so he thinks if he can spoil my good fortunes, then he’s at least done something worthwhile since he returned.

But the best part is that last week on Dynasty he tried to pin it all on me, like I was the one discontent with not being in the Main Event. He’s got it all wrong however, because the real reason I’m in such a piss poor attitude is because GI Styles has been wasting my fucking time. Before Pain for Pride, he and I fought one-on-one and I was excited knowing I was facing off against the man who many consider to be the greatest National Elite Champion of all time, but in reality I got this shell of an athlete who was broken knowing that he wasn’t as good as his ex-partner. That led in to Pain for Pride when you were embarrassed once again while my hand was raised in victory. Then I finally received my shot at Tiberius Jones at Midsummer Massacre; one of the most exhilarating fights of my life. Then I’m told my first challenger is GI Styles and that he’s “changed” and that he’s gone back to the “old” GI Styles but yet time after time we’ve encountered and all I keep seeing is the same bitch GI Styles that I’ve been steamrolling over for months now. And it pisses me off.

GI, I don’t know what your fucking problem is, or why you keep talking and talking and talking without actually doing much to back it up outside of cheap attacks like stabbing me with a pen, but in all honesty these past few weeks have been some of the most boring weeks in my life. I’ve watched week after week while you struggle to come up with ways to remain relevant and look like you have the upper hand, but all you’re really doing is proving to me that you just don’t have what it takes. I’ve been competing on an entirely different level since I’ve arrived here in EAW, I’ve raised the level of competition on Dynasty ten-fold. I’ve been forcing Elitists to up their game from day one. And you my friend are still trying to slide by on the same bullshit that got you by years ago. But if you want the National Elite Championship that sits around my waist? That bullshit isn’t going to work. I had a similar talk with Jacob Senn once before I shocked the world and pinned his ass, and now look where he is. He beat one of the all-time greats at Pain for Pride and is in the main event of Territorial Invasion.

So at Territorial Invasion, it’s simple. Quit talking out of your ass and bring the man who I keep hearing is such a fantastic athlete. Because if you don’t, I’m going to break you. Quit fucking around and actually get serious about your career or I’m going to end it. Most importantly, quit wasting my fucking time and give me a real fucking fight and not the checked out GI Styles I’ve STILL been seeing. It’s like you don’t even fucking care anymore. And honestly if you don’t care, then why should I care about not ending your pathetic excuse for what remains of your career at Territorial Invasion? If you want MY title, if you want to represent a division that I’ve worked so hard to attain, you’re going to have to come at me with some better shit than this. El Maestro told me I was going to get a better GI Styles at Territorial Invasion, and if you make a liar of out El Maestro?

I’m going to end you.

Civil wars have been waged across the world throughout human history. While civil wars have been fought for an array of reasons, there exists a common theme amongst many of the world’s civil wars: the government. Many civil wars have been fought to overthrow or dramatically change a sitting government and this civil war is no different. I'm sure the entire world of professional wrestling knows by now why we want Crash out of power, why we want him in Dynasty Wrestling. Well, I don't know exactly why Conning would want Crash in Dynasty, but I do know why I want him in Dynasty Wrestling... So I can punch his teeth down his damn THROAT. Elite Answers Wrestling and Dynasty Wrestling have indulged in a civil war. And in every war there are casualties. The casualties in this war will all be from EAW. Most specifically each and every single dumbass who supports Zack Crash and his establishment. Speaking of dumbasses, two members of Team EAW have spoken. And honestly, I don't plan on keeping my mouth shut either. I'm talking about Rhaegar and Scott Oasis. Don't worry though.. I got enough bullets with all of your names on them and I am LOCKED AND LOADED.

We're so different and everything you two have said reflect this disparity. At the same time, however, we are similar in terms of motivation. We both want to defend something or someone in your case. Don't tell me any of you are doing this for EAW because that is a load of crap and we both know it, you're all in this FOR Crash, to defend Crash's regime. I know Crash has been busy getting his ass kissed by all of you punks, but I ain't heard a word from him in a long, LONG time. Don't tell me you've already given up, Crash. That would be incredibly disappointing. I've been waiting to get my hands on you for what seems like a thousand years. I have been patient, but patience runs out, Zack Crash and I just can NOT wait anymore. You're responsible for this whole war. You started this when you sent your lapdogs down to the ring at Pain For Pride 8. So don't blame any of us when we END this and end YOU, "devil". Isn't that what you call yourself? Isn't that the perception you want people to have of you? I don't visualize you as a devil or a demon. To me you're just a bitch. You've been hiding behind your lapdogs ever since you got into power. This Saturday though? You can run, you can hide but I will find you. And when I find you, guess what I am going to do to you? I'll give you the ass whooping of a lifetime. I'll make you regret everything you did to this company and to every elitist on the EAW and Dynasty Wrestling rosters.

The last time Kevin Devastation and I were in the same ring things didn't go exactly his way, did they? I don't know why you came back. You should have stayed home considering that last time we shared a ring you got your ass handed to you. That wasn't enough though, was it? You came back to get your ass kicked again... Your wish is my command! It's funny because despite everything people have said about you I kind of respected you. I admired you in some way. But all the respect and all the admiration I felt for you have turned into pity. Yeah, Kevin, I pity you. It's sad, it's pathetic what you have become. I don't even have to say it, everyone knows, everyone is perfectly aware that you are a joke. What happened to the Kevin Devastation that used to kick asses NOT kiss them? He's dead and gone it seems.

I don't have much to say about Hades, Oasis and Rhaegar. Hades knows I don't like him, not after his association with Zack Crash materialized. I don't like Oasis either. Supposedly now he is better than me because of a fluke victory. As for Rhaegar.. the man who claims I have bitched and moaned for every misfortune that has come my way. I'm pretty sure he confused me with AA.. Because I have never complained about a damn thing. In fact, I have embraced every misfortune, every significant failure. They have shaped me, they have transformed me into a better wrestler, into a better person. Next time you got nothing smart to say just keep your mouth shut, Rhaegar... Or I will silence you myself with this here fist.

Civil War:
Territorial Invasion (II)
I am not afraid of an army of lions led by a sheep;

I am afraid of an army of sheep led by a lion.

-Alexander the Great

Tyler Parker, I knew it wasn't going to be unbecoming of you to try and be funny and ask for attention during a period in which we are at war. At this stage, sure, we may be enemies that are looking to bash each others' skulls into pieces, but you want to bring humor into this? So much for the "soldiers" and "veterans" of this company. With your repertoire, it is understood that you think you possess total and utter power and dominion over each and every single being in this place. Just because you are a veteran in a degenerated promotion, just because you have a stash of "championships" and you have been inserted into this pretentious Hall Of Fame doesn't mean absolutely anything. It further taints my head as to why Ventura never managed to beat such a deluded individual such as yourself. For starters, you take on the liberty to insult the tribal marks engraved on my face and say that I am exactly like my fallen brother, Ventura? Such a fatal blow from this former World Champion, it really is rocking me to the core. I would have expected a typical response like that from an amateur, but, well, what am I saying....all of you people are truly indeed amateurs.

It is true that you know nothing about me and that we've never engaged in close combat in the ring, but to directly compare me with my brother? Such horrid observational skills that you have! You ABSOLUTELY have no idea of what I am comprised of, and I know that usually you would brush your hair and drift your eyes on that statement, but this isn't an act of defense on my part. You don't know me whatsoever. I may have wrestled a couple of times already under this place, but I have been seeking for the opportunity and venue where I can loosen the strings of the true and destructive nature of what I can bring. So far, it has just been trickles. Even though I laid to waste the career of this Kevin Drake, it still hadn't convince me to display my caliber. With that, I leave you to excessively crack jokes and take me less and less as a fighter. I want you to embrace the humor, I want you to giggle and laugh like the idiot that you, and the rest of the people in EAW and Dynasty are. When the curtain does finally close, I am going to make you an embarrassment of a "legend".

You have already been in the process of wearing down. You lost your World Championship to a person such as Brian Daniels, a man who has had his career fluctuate up and down, having no real strive to go forward and try and reach whatever potential that he set out for himself. You let a man like that take your title. Do you know what that says about you? It says that you have a vulnerability. You have a syndrome where you constantly talk the talk, but you slip and fall whenever you try to walk. That is it about you, and that is certainly the condition that numerous of people here constantly suffer from. You want that saliva that flow in your mouth to produce something rich and enticing, anything that would make you feel like a superior being and a badass. Zeus, god of thunder and war, would be looking down upon you with much detest, because a man like you continues to live day in and day out. I know for a fact that there have been numerous instances where you bit your own tongue saying worthless thing, but in a grand spectacle such as Territorial Invasion, it would truly be a pleasure to watch the full unraveling of this.

Go on Tyler, make another go at me, have something that can strike and rattle my ears. All of this, all that I have been hearing so far, are just constant murmurs. From a "talent" such as you, at least try and pretend that you are indeed great.

An impact, that’s what people intend to make, correct? They try their hardest to do that one thing that is going make the entire world watch on in awe because of the pure brilliance that is their existence. They try with all their might to create something that will never be forgotten; something that the world is going to be able to look back at as an instrumental part of this company’s history. Jamie, if you walk into Territorial Invasion on Saturday and successfully walk out as the new EAW Champion, your name will immediately become legendary. A man that was able to successfully do what no other has been able to accomplish. You cashed in, whether it be the Cash in the Vault briefcase or the King of Elite crown on a fresh champion and successfully walked out as a champion. That’s an impact that anyone in this business would give their soul to make. I said this the week after you made that huge announcement that you were cashing in that briefcase at Territorial Invasion, that I’ve watched you from the very beginning. I’ve watched you quickly stride through the ranks of this company; from the New Breed Championship reign, to being to man that caused Jacob Senn to be dethroned from his first World Championship reign, to winning that Cash in the Vault briefcase at Pain for Pride. You’ve taken that giant leap from being the big fish in the small pond as the leader of the New Breed, to swimming in the deep end with sharks and you’ve thrive just as well as I did when I did the same. You ooze this confidence that it’s only a matter of days, hour and seconds before this Championship that cherish more than life itself, hangs from your shoulder. You look at Territorial Invasion as the moment that you finally grasp onto that crowning achievement; nothing that I’m going to be able to muster up is going to be enough to stop you from finally standing at the top of Elite Answers Wrestling as the EAW Champion, ridding the company of the plague that you see me as. I’ve been forced to listen to the same story for over a year, Jamie. I don’t deserve to be the EAW Champion. I don’t deserve to be the Face of Elite. I don’t deserve to be the Face of Elite Answers Wrestling. I don’t deserve the hold the Cash in the Vault briefcase. I don’t deserve to stand at the top of the company with men that the world looks upon as this company’s elite. I don’t deserve to be the New Breed Champion. I don’t deserve to be on developmental show like NEO, let alone a brand like Dynasty!

You see, Jamie, I want you to ask yourself one question; as much as you’re going to profess that you are, but when you really think about it, what makes you any different to every other person that has stood in my way throughout the entirety of these two EAW Championship reigns? I was told by Charlie Scene heading into our match at the Grand Rampage that nothing that I was going to do would be enough to stop the man from taking this championship a mere month into my first reign; that I was nothing more than a placeholder for the man’s crowning achievement for his entire career, but when Grand Rampage came around and it was time for the man to bring an ounce to truth to the words that he had spewed, it was him that had fallen at the feet of the champion. I had this championship ripped from my unconscious hands at the order of Zack Crash; I had to watch the man parade around as a champion, saying that same thing that you are. I’m not the Best in the World. I’m told that this is his world and this company is going to be shaped into the image that he wants for it. I was given a rematch and when that match came I walked out and conquered Zack Crash’s world. I was told by Hades the Hellraiser that our match at Midsummer Massacre would be the complete destruction of Xavier Williams; that when it was all said and done that my head with sit over his fireplace, but when it came time for the “monster” to reclaim his position at the top of the company, that monster was slain. You say that you understand the pressure that you’ve placed on your own shoulders, but I really don’t believe that you do. This confidence that you have has clouded the end result. You’re so convinced that you’re walking out of Territorial Invasion as the EAW Champion that you’ve ignored one major possibility. This is it. Territorial Invasion is your one opportunity to claim greatness, because as I said on Showdown, you fail and everything that you’ve worked for was for absolutely nothing. You fall straight back down into the position that you were in when you first entered this company those fifteen months ago; looking from the bottom up, hoping that one day you’ll actually have the opportunity to sit on MY throne at the top of the company. You call yourself Tomorrow’s Legend, but you’re nothing more than a man could have been.

Clark is sitting at home in his recently purchased condo, the money from his promotion by way of Voltage GM, Ashten Cross. Clark is pinning up mugshots of various elitists on a blank wall in a relatively empty room.

Clark: Eh, I think that's the last one.

The shot then quickly to Mario Rossi bursting through the door before suddenly stopping and admiring the condo in awe.

Mario: Mamma mia, somebody got a pay day to die for...

Clark wanders out to see Mario with pizza boxes stacked up seven-high.

Clark: How'd you know I was hungry?

Mario: When we've been friends for this long, let's just say I had an inkling.

Clark: Heh, gimme that!

Mario: Patience, young padawan.

Clark: Don't get between a hungry talent relations man and his pizza, bro.

Mario: Ohhh, promotion eh? That explains this lavish little place hey. Well, I guess the big shot does deserve a feed.

Clark: Less talk, more give. Hand 'em over.

Mario: Nope, first you gotta tell me how all this (Mario arms pans around the room and gestures at certain items) came to be.

Mario puts the pizzas down on the coffee table as he and Clark seat themselves on the sofa.

Clark: Well, you remember the song and dance I made a few weeks back? Well, Ashten and I had a fruitful discussion. We talked business, I got a promotion, and I start the week after Civil War. It's gonna be good.

Mario: Shit, this cat is making moves.

Clark: Yep, I'm a businessman. I know how to do things to get ahead. You see, there's a light at the end of the tunnel. I do a job for Ashten Cross and I get what I want at the end of it. I called for this, I'm doing this for me. Sure, I used the people as the reason, but I'm all about me.

Mario: I like it, tell me more.

Clark: Basically, I just have to pick the cream of the Voltage crop to participate in a little tournament. I hand out invitations to whoever I think deserves one and they get a chance to take on Aren Mstislav for the Pure Championship.

Mario: Aren't you the one that should be getting that shot?

Clark: I could be, but hopefully I can get a better opportunity if I carry this out to Ashten's satisfaction. I'm basically in charge of talent relations. In this role, I'm effectively calling the shots. I consider this place my office.

Mario: Not baaaad.

Clark leads Mario into the room that he set up to plan everything.

Clark: This is where the serious work gets done. Every Voltage elitist is on that wall right there and I have to decide who joins Gabriel Eden and Luke Braxton in the tournament. It's not exactly a job that everyone would want. You see, I'm going to have to make some tough calls. Leaving out quality will probably result in resent and backlash, but I'm ready to cop whatever comes at me. I took this job because I wanted to deal with anything that came with it. You know me, I like to keep life interesting.

Mario: You know, people are surprised you did it because Ashten Cross is a slimy customer.

Clark: I'm aware of public perception, but they'll see that I can play any game Ashten wants and if he tries to pull something on me, I'm ready to flick the switch and turn on him. We've got an understanding right now and if he backs out of our little deal, he knows what's coming.

Mario: You're gonna mess with the GM of Voltage?

Clark: Only if need be, but it won't come to that. I intend to do the job given to me, or that I set out to more or less acquire. I wanted change and I'm the one with the power to make it happen. Ashten bestowed upon me something that no ordinary elitist would be given. I could be essentially be the mastermind behind EAW's next big thing. If I spot somebody that I think can win the tournament and take Aren's title, I get given the kudos for having a keen eye for talent.

Mario: Clark, you're a true visionary.

Clark: I know you don't mean that, you bastard.

Mario: I mean it.

Clark: Lies.

Mario: I can walk out the doors with these pizzas and you'll curl up in a ball on the floor and bawl your eyes for hours. Believe me.

Clark: Don't even dare.

Mario: Holy shit, we're like a married couple.

Clark: The pizzas stay, you go.

Mario: Don't come crawling to me when I take your specialty of the menu at my pizza place.

Clark: Yo, chill. Say, I need to start making some decisions on who to bring into the tournament and I need somebody to bounce some scenarios off. I reckon we hit up the liquor store down the road, come back here and work it out.

Mario: Deal. Just watch your intake.

Clark: Says the Italian.

Mario: Only nonna's grappa gets ol' Mario struggling.

Clark: If I could only find my wallet...

Mario: Shit, are you that disorganized?

Clark: Uh, no.

Mario: And to think Ashten entrusted you to hand out invitations. You probably put them straight in the trash without thinking.

Clark: Nope. Definitely not. They're safe. In fact, they're ri...

Clark looks around frantically as he realizes the invitations aren't in the spot he remembered them last being in.

Mario: I'll call the search party. I know people.

Clark: Ugh.

Mario: So much for beers. You need to get your shit together, you clown.

Clark: Easy.

Mario: You say that... yet you can't find your wallet or the envelopes?

Clark: Shut up.

Mario: Alan Partridge would love this banter.

Clark: Speaking of, did you catch the Chelsea vs Walsall game?

Mario: Keep your mind on the job. We're not leaving until you find these things. The longer you waste time, the colder the pizza gets.

Clark: You win this time Mario, but you know I always have the last laugh!

Clark and Mario begin turning the condo upside down in search of Clark's wallet and the invitations handed to Clark from Ashten Cross. The camera fades out as Clark looks visibly worried and Mario shakes his head looking rather unimpressed.

"BUT BE YE DOERS OF THE WORD, AND NOT HEARERS ONLY, DECEIVING YOUR OWN SELVES." - JAMES 1:22

Three years. For the past three years, I've been in some kind of five on five match, I was in last year's War Games and I'm in this year's War Games, so needless to say? I have more experience than anyone in this match. Not just that but I know what we have to do to win. I did it last year, I did it two years ago, I'm all too familiar with it. I'm either trying not to get erased from EAW history or trying to protect EAW but this year? This year isn't either of that. This year, I'm trying to make sure that Zack Crash has none of the rights to Dynasty because I and anyone with a brain knows that if he had the rights to Dynasty, he'd just close the brand like he was going to before we did something about it. You know, I've been on Dynasty for a year and a half, Dynasty is more than a brand to me at this point in my career, even if I used to think that Showdown was where I'd be for the entirety of my career. I wouldn't want for any of the brands to close but because of some stipulation that Zack Crash made, it was going to be Dynasty to close and it didn't seem like he'd re-sign any of us, so what were we to do? Just let him do what he wants? I know, I know, I'm why he's the Chairman but had I known what was going to happen thereafter, I wouldn't have joined Team Crash. Because then I thought that Crash would do what he needs to do as Chairman but he's just been doing whatever he wants and it's been eating at me for a year. For a year, I've had to go to sleep at night knowing that Zack Crash is Chairman because of me. For a year, I've had to swallow that pill but after this Saturday? I won't have that eating at me anymore. I won't be losing any sleep. I won't be swallowing that pill. Oh but after this Saturday, something is going to be eating at Zack Crash. He's going to be losing sleep because of something. He's going to be swallowing a big pill because that pill is the something I'm talking about, that pill he's going to be swallowing is everything that he has done in the past year, from screwing others out of title shots to giving himself the EAW Championship, his wrongdoings are going to be what bites him on the ass once he's a part of Dynasty. That too is going to eat at him because I know he wants nothing to do with Dynasty but that's what he and Mr. Conning agreed on and he's just going to have to hold up his end of the bargain. Because if not, then I'm just going to have to drag him onto Dynasty myself and don't think I won't because I will. You're probably wondering how could I say that if Team Dynasty has been having problems and I'm not going to sit here and act like we haven't had any problems, that much is obvious. See though, we may not like each other, I sure as hell don't like any of my teammates but we've joined Team Dynasty for one reason. We're not doing this for ourselves, we're not doing this because we have to say "yes" to a higher up, we're not doing this for anything that Team EAW is doing this for because if Zack Crash thinks his teammates care whether or not he's the Chairman, none of them couldn't care less if he is, they just care about themselves. They just care if there's something in it for them. They just care if they're main eventing. It's a shame that's the kind of team you have representing EAW, it's a shame the likes of Kevin Devastation, Hades, Rhaegar, Scott Oasis and Zack Crash himself are representing the company, it's a just shame that Zack Crash is going to be a part of Dynasty after this Saturday.

I've said what I had to say about Zack Crash, I have nothing else to say about him, so why don't I speak on every other member of Team EAW? Starting... with that make-up wearing Kevin Devastation. I forgot he was even back but that's been going on for too long, him coming back. He has came back so much that no one even cares anymore. I don't think anyone has ever cared if he was back or not because what is there to care about? I mean, take a look at yourself, Kevin. Go to the bathroom, look in the mirror and see what you've become. Just pathetic. You're so pathetic, you know that? It makes me sick just looking at you, so I could only imagine how sick you must feel. Talk as much as you want because I know how much you like talking and I know how much you like talking yourself up, so keep talking. Keep talking about what you're going to do to me and the rest of Team Dynasty. Keep talking because that's all you're going to do. This Saturday, when the bell rings, all of that talk is going to get you eliminated. I'd tell you to be careful of what you say because you just might end up eating them but knowing you, you're going to eat them anyways. Knowing you??? Knowing you, you're just going to run away when the going gets tough because you've been doing that all throughout your career. If anyone cares about themselves more than anyone else? It's you. You're so full of yourself that it's not even funny. I used to laugh whenever you'd try to come back but now, now I don't laugh whatsoever because the joke has gotten old and so have you. Why did you even come back? Losing to Tiberius Jones wasn't fun, was it? Or was it not fun losing to me? I know it wasn't fun losing to me because I shut you up. I shut you up after all of your talk. I shut you up, then Tiberius Jones shuts up and you know what happened? You ran away. You ran away because of how pathetic you are, you've just ran away from all of it, I wouldn't run away from anything... not even from this year's War Games. Because unlike you, I have respect for myself and for this business. Unlike you, I don't quit when the going gets tough. Unlike you? I'M THE FACE OF DYNASTY, THE FACE OF EAW AND THE FACE OF THIS FUCKING BUSINESS. So go ahead, convince yourself that you're still some kind of a threat to me and to Team Dynasty. Go ahead and convince yourself that you're worth something. Go ahead and convince yourself of whatever because this Saturday? I'm going to embarrass you. So much so that you're going to wish you never came back. I'm going to embarrass you more than you embarrass yourself... if that's even possible. There's another member of Team EAW who wears make-up and he goes by Rhaegar. I don't know much about him, I've never been in the ring with him but I have been in the ring with his brother and if he's anything like his brother, then he too isn't a threat to me or Team Dynasty. Rhaegar, you haven't been in EAW for that long, have you? You know, I don't know what you've done in the few months you've been here but I do know that you be doing anything after this Saturday. Because see, you took out your flesh and blood and this Saturday? I'm going to take you out. Bat an eyelash, roll your eyes, huff and puff as much as you want because you're not going to be able to get out of the ring on your own. You're going to need your brother, someone, anyone to pick you up. I want you and Kevin Devastation to know something and that's that no amount of make-up... could hide just how pathetic both of you are.

Hades the... no, just... Hades. It would be giving yourself too much credit to call you the Hellraiser because what have you accomplished in your career to be called that, Hades? You're a former Answers World Champion but that wasn't memorable. As for me though? I'm a two-time World Champion and my second reign was one of the longest reigns with the World Heavyweight Championship, that reign alone is more memorable than your reign, than anything you've accomplished and that includes the Grand Rampage. I've had one of the longest reigns with the National Extreme Championship but all of that PALES IN COMPARISON... to the Hall of Fame ring on my finger. You know what I've had to go through to get this? Ohhh ho ho, you want to know? I've had to go through the death of my grandfather, overcome the odds, be told that I'd never do it. I've had to go through my mentor, Mr. DEDEDE, several times in my career. I've had to go through the first ever High Voltage match, the first ever Hellfire No Way Out match. I've had to go through last year's War Games, Team Diamond the year before that. I've had to literally walk through Hell just to get this. It's those trials and tribulations that have made me who I am today. All of those trials and tribulations have culminated to this Saturday when I eliminate you, like you eliminated me in the Grand Rampage two years ago, from War Games. I'm going to show that I do have the passion, that I do have the fire, the passion and fire that I've had for my entire career. For whatever reason, Scott Oasis thinks that I just don't have that anymore. He thinks after seeing me the other week on Dynasty, seeing me annoyed of being a part of Team Dynasty... if he thinks I don't have the passion or fire, then I'm going to eliminate him first. I'm going to eliminate every single member of Team EAW and there's nothing Hades, Scott Oasis or any of them can do about it. I may not be the World Heavyweight Champion anymore but that doesn't mean I shouldn't bother because this is something that I started... and this is something that I'm going to have to end. If I can't beat them? Then I shouldn't be in this business. If I can't beat Team EAW, then I've let Dynasty down, then I would have but I can beat them, I've beaten Team Diamond and I've beaten Team DEDEDE. That's the experience I have, that's where it comes in, is when the bell rings. No one is going to give them their all like I'm going to. There are those scared of them and what they would do but me? I'm not scared of anything, not even them. What's there to be scared of? Nothing. Hades isn't the Hellraiser anymore, Scott Oasis is the biggest tool in the tool shed. Kevin Devastation and Rhaegar wear make-up and Zack Crash... well, Zack Crash has that stupid look on his face. The stupidest look at that. But this Saturday, he's not going to have that look on his face because he's going to be throwing a hissy fit after I and Team Dynasty make light work of them. Yeah, I know TLA isn't going to want to co-exist with me after what I did on Dynasty but he's just going to have to as I'm going to be co-existing with him and everyone else. Our problems should be settled after this Saturday. If one of them tries anything though, whether it be Lucian Black, Jacob Senn, Carlos Rosso or TLA himself... if any of them tries anything that'd cost us the match, then their problems are nothing compared to the problem that I'd be for them. So, let's put our differences aside, let's try to co-exist with each other and let's do what we have to against Team EAW. The past two years, I've had big eliminations that gave my teams the win but this year? This year, I'm going to be the sole survivor.

Civil War:
Territorial Invasion (I)

"Because fear makes each man do his best to shelter his unarmed right side with
the shield of the man next to him, thinking that the closer the shields
are locked together the better will he be protected."
-Thucydides

None of you people are ready to partake in a war.

It is quite blasphemous that people are advertising this Territorial Invasion event to be a "war" among soldiers. It truly is pitiful and ridiculous. I know that the people in this company tend to be overly pretentious of certain things, but this is just being escalated to a whole, another level. None of you are soldiers of this company. You can pray to whichever deity that you belong with to try and have the essential characteristics of being a soldier, but by the end of the day, you all are nothing more but common filth.

Ever since Hexa-Gun made their mark, I didn't see a group of people coming from out of nowhere to attempt and fight back against them. All of you were just acting as bystanders, just watching on full display the chaos and pandemonium that Hexa-Gun inflicted upon this company, something that shouldn't have happened in the first place. For thirty-one days, there were so many opportunities for you people to do something, to actually validate your claims as being an "elitist" in the making. However, people wait for an event such as Territorial Invasion to make their appearance and hope to unleash their "inner destruction". Some things never change.

It wasn't too long ago when I decided to make one of the biggest sacrifices yet, and that was become acquaintances with a man that I share no common mind with--Zack Crash. I never liked him nor will I ever respect him for who he is as a person. Some of you may be appalled by that because he was the man that brought me to this place. Wrong.

I just became a substitute for the failure of my brother, Ventura.

That was all there is to it. He couldn't take upon the task to be a full-fledged warrior and slay all of his enemies with one fatal blow. Instead, he fell under the trance of performing "magic" tricks, being this sort of "caster", he just decided to take on the role of being an entertainer and abandon what he was originally sent forth to do. Now, I am not even aware of the location of this carcass. He has become nothing more but a distant memory, plagued with failures and defeat. In order to survive, in order to expand and continue to grow and grow into a better person, you need to show wit and strength--traits that nobody in this company genuinely posses, with the exception of yours truly. I am proud to say that I am still the deluxe package, that I am still the most menacing individual that eyes have ever laid upon. But, but you already know that...

So Territorial Invasion will be the battlefield for EAW to take on Dynasty, which was formerly one of the brands under EAW. Wrap your head around that for just a mere second. We even have sub-divisions of EAW going at it for no apparent reason, truly remarkable. Zack Crash keeps pacing back and forth with worry, thinking and stuttering to himself because he fears that he is going to be shipped over to Dynasty---a "company" that has shown no capacity whatsoever? It's like I rather entered a carnival instead of a wrestling promotion! Why does Territorial Invasion have to be the hallmark to fully annihilate your adversaries, especially since the people of Dynasty are merely like everyone else in EAW?! Why couldn't we start this war last week, or yesterday, or just an hour ago? Because people are just too scared to make that sacrifice and proof to be the better and the most dominant man, fearing that they may make a mistake or two. That is the point of being a wrestler, you NEED to make mistakes in order to rebound and learn from them. I may talk a hard game most of the time, but I certainly know that I am not the most perfect being there is, but that doesn't mean I can't have that mentality of being perfect, which leaves me with something to aim at. Everyone else in this company wants to aim at winning that coveted World Championship, while roughly all of them have shown no prowess whatsoever to even be considered as a "one in the making" candidate. This is why this event serves to be one of the most futile events yet for me, but however, I am only willing to be in this just for compensation sake, I could care less what happens to Zack Crash, whether he becomes Dynasty's new lapdog or become a janitor, it isn't my priority. What I need is what I will get after this act is all but completed.

Team Dynasty:
-Lucian Black (a man that has basically whined and moaned over every misfortune that has come his way)
-TLA (a hooligan that doesn't take anything seriously)
-Carlos Rosso (a decorated "veteran" that has yet to rise up)
-Jacob Senn (thinks of himself as a "fabled conqueror", ludicrous)
-Tyler Parker (quite ridiculous how Ventura never managed to defeat him)

This is going to be marvelous.

Whether any of those five children said anything before me, that really isn't my business to refer back and try to make sense of the garbage that you may have spewed, so it would really suit everyone's interest if they truly sit down and listen to real and strict talk. You call yourself Dynasty, you make yourselves be excluded from EAW, but you people originate right from the same shell. There is nothing unique or special because you people decided to make a separate promotion. Nothing at all. Even with that, the reason as to why you five want to come to war with EAW is because you just want Zack Crash as your prize? Is that really going to be the fullest extent of your "war" against EAW? Why can't you make promises such as you will take over EAW, that you will lay bodies incapacitated, you will hijack the shows, why can't you say any of those things? Well, it's simply because none of you carry the trait of endurance within you. It is just completing the main objective that will make all of you dance together, but none of you will be willing to take it to the next level. Shall I even continue to make any more cases, because I think I have pretty much guessed the mindset of Team Dynasty in under just general observations. Team Dynasty was receive a loss, and all of you will like it and accept it. All five of you all could have decided to do the wise thing and decline this match, but you want to go out there as heroes and just acquire that paycheck at the end of it all. That routine will unfortunately not continue on. I have been waiting for the opportunity to participate in a match where it matches my skill, where it matches my expertise and prowess, and this is it right here, taking on multiple opponents at once and striking from all sought of angles. These types of matches are always encrypted in me, it's an inseparable gene, and that is because I have the Spartan blood that gushes and gives me that energy and vibe. You people just have blood, and nothing more. Just iron pumping each and every day, having no trace or succession. I have a trace, I have a reason, and I have the urge to do what I do as a wrestler, not a "professional wrestler" Enough with such theatrics of "professionalizing" wrestling. You people want to prove your worth to me, then I will be waiting across the distance, opening my arms as a token of acceptance. I don't need any other team to work alongside me. This is a match in which I thrive in, and if Dynasty can somehow find a way to beat me at my own game, then I will easily conceit defeat. Until then, Dynasty is a sham.

It’s fun to reminisce.

With Territorial Invasion in full swing I can’t help but take a trip down memory lane. Exactly one year ago I made my pay-per-view debut at that very event but it was under much different circumstances than the ones I am faced with currently. While all of the “A-Listers” were fighting for titles or participating in the annual tag warfare, I wasn’t able to make it on the card. I was mindlessly thrown onto the pre-show as just another name in a sea of unknown battle royal participants. I couldn't really be bitter about it, at the time nobody knew what I was capable of. I was barely starting to get my feet wet in the Land of Elite and was predicted to be another failed AWF guy. If you took a look at the betting odds not a single person expected me to be even close to making it to the final four, let alone the final two yet somehow I pulled it off. I didn’t just slide on by either, I threw out nearly half of the guys in there! When I left that arena I went from a ham and egger to a true EAW Elitist and now here I am one year later competing in War Games and representing our company. It really is fitting that we come full circle for this as I return to the event that made me legit and make one final step into becoming a bonafide star. I am going to play a part in one of the biggest matches in history and I did it without the support of anyone but myself. The fans didn’t believe in me, Showdown management just wanted to use me, nobody saw Scott Oasis as anything but a bit player but look at me now! I sure have made something of myself haven’t I!? This main event is about to be my crowning moment and it is going to be all the more sweet knowing I proved all of you wrong. Scratch that. All of you except one. While everyone else treated me like a non factor there was one man who actually saw me for what I was and that is one of the best wrestlers in the world. He hand chose me as the future, someone he could rely on for years to come! He wanted to invest in me and he did. Truthfully, even that wouldn’t be able to properly describe how much stake he has put into me. There is only one man who would do something like this and that man is Zack Crash. Everyone tries to smear him and his regime through the mud but as much as they want to deny it, he knows what he is doing. His run has been a success and should not have to be put in jeopardy with him becoming a Dynasty talent, he couldn’t have found me at a better time.

Zack has had a lot on his plate in recent months ever since this Dynasty nonsense has started up and now is the time that it must come to an end. In order to do so, Zack needed people to come through in the clutch and there were many of us ready to answer the call. Zack has been able to assemble one of the greatest teams ever seen and I’ll even go as far as to say we dwarf Team Dynasty in every way imaginable. They can talk about their loyalty and their dedication to this resistance as much as they want but nobody feels as strongly about this as we do. We’re tired of Dynasty Wrestling trying to piggyback off of the work we were responsible for! We’re tired of Dynasty Wrestling acting as if they’re these victims of unfair work conditions and that they didn’t lose the Brand Survival match! Most of all though, we’re tired of Dynasty Wrestling existing and will do whatever it takes to make sure it breathes it’s last breath. In a matter of days that desire will no longer be a pipe dream, it will become a reality. The Dynasty contract will become property of EAW and the show’s very fate is put into our hands! John Conning and his goons have been hounding us for weeks, doing their best to try and rally the troops but honestly all this hope is just a waste of energy. Team Dynasty is walking over to enemy territory as the last line of defense but as I look over their team and see what they have to offer I can’t help but be disappointed.

Tell me, what exactly does Team Dynasty have to offer in order for us to be sweating this match up? Lucian Black? I went toe to toe with him last week and defeated him just like I said I would. Lucian hasn’t been credible since Grand Rampage, all he is now is the perfect example of the phrase “what could have been.” He “could have been” the World Heavyweight Champion. He “could have been” Dynasty’s Champion. He “could have been” a star. Hey, he even “could have been” the one to save Dynasty Wrestling from being dropped in the first place, but do you want know why all of these possibilities never came to fruition? Well if you want me to put it plainly it’s simply because he’s just not good enough. Lucian Black isn’t fit to be the flag bearer for any promotion or be considered a champion. He reached his ceiling a long, long time ago and to expect the guy notorious for folding in high pressure situations to suddenly step up and deliver is the most moronic decision Conning could have ever made. I said it before and I don’t think I can call enough attention to it, how can anyone check out this man’s track record and still choose to believe in him? Oh, I remember why, Lucian is the master at getting people to buy into his brand. Lucian could lose a million matches and then turn around and tell his supporters everything will change. That sums it up a "T", he gives them what they want to hear, talking about not giving up while being sure to make note of all of his honor bullshit and the Dy-Hards eat it up every time. He has that same speech and without that speech his career wouldn’t have a leg to stand on. As good as it is though, that speech won’t be able to allow him to recover from this.

I would have said his entire team couldn't recover but Carlos Rosso's career has already been past that stage of recovery, I don’t think he even sees himself going anywhere. He’s busted his ass for years, done everything there is to be done in the tag team division and has picked up singles accolades all over the place but has yet to find his footing in the main event after all of this time. That is due to the fact he is a choke artist just like Lucian Black and lives in that exact same la-la land of denial. Now unlike the so-called Samoan Avenger, Carlos isn’t keeping himself going out of blind optimism, he’s instead fueled by his own egotism. In his mind it’s not his fault he’s where he’s at, it’s just the same old “woe is me”, Carlos Rosso is being underrated shtick he’s bitched about for what has felt like an eternity. I'd normally let someone like him be since that's all they have but the worst part about it is how he chooses to look down on people as if he has this right to sit on his high horse. All I hear is “young boy” this and “young boy” that. Maybe you should try pulling your head out of your ass so you could see that these supposed young boys are doing better than you by leaps and bounds. As I think about it more and more I start to believe there’s more to this situation than meets the eye. Carlos didn’t just join this to help Dynasty, he joined Team Dynasty as one last attempt to keep up with a wrestling scene that is passing him by. The door is slowly but surely closing on him. This is his chance to get into the main event and maintain relevancy. That’s the same feeling I got from him at Pain For Pride 8 and we all saw what happened there. He failed. History has a funny way of repeating himself, unfortunately. Carlos’s current run reeks of desperation from a man with not a lot of chances at glory. This is going to be another one of those chances gone to waste. He isn’t getting his resurgence.

That reminds me, as we’re on the topic of resurgence I’ll just point out the obvious and say Jacob Senn won’t be making his comeback either. I don’t even know why they put that scrub in this match anyway, I think I can speak for everyone when I say that nobody has cared about him since he lost the EAW Championship nine months ago. Come to think of it, has he even done anything of note after that? You know, besides defeating Jaywalker and immediately halting the momentum he gained from it. He’s made nothing of what he’s been given and will only prove to do the same come Saturday. This is what happens when you scrape from the bottom of the barrel for your team, people! You end up with a guy whose only claim to fame is being champion on a roster where the only person capable of besting him was Diamond fucking Cage! Yeah, I’m real worried about what he’s capable of doing! I’m not sure if I want to laugh or cry at this point, these are the guys standing in the way of us getting Dynasty off the air? Is there ANYONE on it who can truly stop us? I guess the two remaining members I have not brought up could potentially put up a fight but they’re too busy fighting each other! TLA and Tyler have spent their entire preparation for this match being at each other’s throats and even if they could put their differences aside, so much time has been wasted they would still get overwhelmed. In a match like War Games, everybody needs to be on the same page and working with each other all of the way, you can’t just come together at the last minute and win! It’s not as if they could handle us on their own either, they show no real capabilities of being able to do so.

Tyler Parker is pretty much going through the motions at this point. There’s no passion for what he does, no fire in him anymore. When I saw him be announced for his team the other week he looked like he wanted to be anywhere but in that ring with you all. That is a look he has seemed to grow accustomed to since Midsummer Massacre and It’s as if he checked out after losing the World title. Who can blame him, there’s no reason for him to keep going. It’s like looking at a wounded dog waiting to die, killing Dynasty would serve more as a favor to him than an injustice. As for TLA he’s just a stubborn idiot choosing to stay on a sinking ship. He can talk about being knocked down and continuing to rise up but that isn’t a true strength, it’s just foolishness. The way I see it, he is knowingly walking into a slaughter. You guys aren’t stronger than ever, if anything I’d say Dynasty is at the weakest state of it’s existence. We are looking at a company hanging by a thread and all it has left is hope. What they don’t understand is in EAW we don’t go off of hope, we go off of a results and like we always do we’ll get the job done.

As I help hammer in the final nail in their coffin and continue my ascent to the top, I can’t help but think about how the five of them will react. Will their reaction be one of shock? Sadness? Realization? Perhaps even acceptance because they saw it coming all along? I’m not sure what it will be but what I know for sure is that a career will be built out of Dynasty’s demise.

[Y2Impact and The Heart Break Gal are seen circling around various rooms of The Lair in Seattle, Washington. They finally settle in the theater room and they can be seen talking to each other inaudibly, apparently mulling over Territorial Invasion: Civil War with each other. Heart Break Gal begins speaking]

HBG: It's been two fucking days. This silence is deafening. Where the hell is everyone? Where is Mr. DEDEDE, and that tiny vein popping out of the side of his throat when he's screaming maniacally of his plans to destroy The Mercenaries with the world as his witnesses? Where is Ryan Savage and his puckered lips to smooch on the ground DEDEDE walks on, follow him everywhere he goes, and continue being an overshadowed sidekick? What ever happened to Kennedy? Does no one still give a fuck about him other than his girlfriend who has flown higher in her month-long career than he's been able to do since signing his EAW contract? Is Aren still crying late at night about how awful Y2Impact was for stealing his Pure Championship, as he sings depressing Russian songs about it? And what about the Pizza Boy? Are those four going to sit back and accept the fact that a guy DEDEDE picked out of the blue and wants nothing to do with this mess, the rising star of EAW who wants nothing more than to win his matches and go forth with his career, and not give it an early end, has delivered, fought and taken matters to his own hands the way NONE of the other members could? This is embarrassing, DEDEDE, even for you as the leader of your team. I'm sure you've lived up to the reputation when it comes to being the all-knowing Gawd of making stupid fucking decisions when it involves this war against the Hexa-gun, but this is just an all-time low.

Oftentimes I wonder where Mr. DEDEDE's intentions truly lie. I get that after a month of losing your Unified Tag Team Championships made you wake up in a snap and realize that you wanted to get back at The Mercenaries for the humiliating defeat you suffered at the biggest event in EAW history at our hands. You didn't like being walked over, which I really don't blame you for, DEDEDE. Nobody wants that. You tried to recuperate and regain some small shred of confidence to show your face on live TV to answer all of the questions your die-hard fans were waiting anxiously to ask. You'd love nothing more than to scream at everybody unintelligibly about how you're back and better than ever, and that from here on out, your career will be smooth sailing and never again will you tolerate that level of embarrassment and go down quietly. You must take Ryan Savage by his arm and promise him a better tomorrow! You must make it known that it's not over until you say so! You have extended a helping hand to Zack Crash despite your lingering hatred towards him after he took your precious company, for the sole purpose of stopping the force that Y2Impact and I have gathered to take over EAW... And for what, DEDEDE? For the Tag Team Championship belts? To prove that you are actually better than Y2Impact? Are you still hung up on that idea? Because if it was as simple as that, you could have just expressed it verbally, you could have just challenged us for the Tag Titles, lose again, and then move on with your careers. But no, that wasn't the first thing you had in mind, you had everyone convinced that your reasons for fighting this losing battle were deeply woven. I doubt you care what happens to EAW once Hexa-gun takes over. I doubt any part of you would sympathize for Zack Crash, and you made that very clear when Ryan Savage drove Crash's head right onto the mat just a few days ago on Dynasty Wrestling. AND LET'S NOT LIE HERE, DEDEDE. YOU ARE SUPPORTING THE IDEA OF BRINGING EXTREME RULES WRESTLING BACK IN EAW. You've taken chairshots from a guy jumping off a ladder. You have bled countless times in high profile matches at Pain for Pride, and won championships by outsmarting your opponents and using lethal force more often than not. So why are you pretending to hate the goals of Hexa-gun? Why do you want to get involved in this mess so bad when EAW isn't even a company that you're a part of?

HAH. Why am I even wondering? Why does Mr. DEDEDE ever do anything, if not for Mr. DEDEDE himself? The Savage Ryans have been afterthoughts, one of them took a sabbatical, and the other is consistently unable to find his niche and create something compelling out of his bland, stale, going-nowhere career. You want your time to shine on the stage, and we're going to give you exactly that. You want to give life to the remainder of your career, you want to make it mean something, you want to become the predatory Mr. DEDEDE that stood atop his fallen enemies showing no remorse. You are willing to put your incompetent, randomly picked, unfit and unsuitable teammates in harm's way for the sake of fulfilling your ulterior motives, and they're going to turn a blind eye, convince themselves that you actually believe in them as much as the demented Chairman does, and think that this match is exactly what they need to make something out of their pathetic careers, only to realize that they've set themselves up to become walking targets for Hexa-gun to eliminate one by one... By one.

I couldn't forget about Pizza Boy! The man whose name livens the appetites of everyone around him. You are in no position to place doubts on what you've done at Showdown. You don't get to contemplate. You don't get to rethink. We gave you the opportunity to stand by and aid us in further damaging a broken team that continues a fruitless resistance against us. We chose to spare you, allowed you to get back on those who pushed you into this mess without your consent and you repay our trust with hostility and defiance. You have picked the side you're on and I can see that you're not very smart in doing so, and if it's not clear enough for you, this is the reality of things -- you are nothing but a filler, you are nothing but an extra guy, just another buffoon that DEDEDE can blame if things don't fall in his favor; a scapegoat. He's not fighting for EAW. He's not fighting in honor of the hardworking competitors. He doesn't have any clean intentions like you do. You've just been deluded into thinking that we're the bad guys because they need you to be motivated, and they can use it to their advantage. And if by some miracle your team wins because of you, I've no doubt about it, DEDEDE would take credit and leave you in the dark to fend for yourself until you are completely forgotten as you've always been. Are you going to let them do that, Pizza Boy? Heh... I wouldn't doubt it.

[Heart Break Gal looks into the camera without hesitation, appearing bold but clearly annoyed. She looks over at Y2Impact who listened intently to her words, and he's smiling without a worry in the world. He stops for a moment and and motions his right hand in the form of a gun against his head, pulling the "trigger." Unfazed, he speaks]

Y2Impact: Well, well, well, EAW has a show to sell and their exhaustive efforts to advertise this event and pit the most competitive and cutthroat adversaries against each other won't go unnoticed, I'm certain of that. Hexa-gun was scheduled at Territorial Invasion out of spite, out of this nonsensical childish longing to vindicate Mr. DEDEDE and vilify the group banded together for the purpose of restoring purity to EAW and wrestling altogether by reverting it to its extreme roots that drew everybody to this company like a magnet, like a moth to flame, like Brett Kennedy to repeatedly losing matches and failing miserably when it matters most. Those are marriages that form some of the most natural dynamics, things that amalgamate like peanut butter and jelly or a relaxing swim on a hot summer day. Hexa-gun is trying to right these wrongs, and instead of being awarded with the opportunity to accomplish that, we get The Savage Ryans and three other wrestlers matched and strung together on a whim alone and nothing more. I already proved how effortless it was to subdue Aren Mstislav, to force him into panic and desperation, to make him question the virtues of the honor and sanctity he so proudly stands by like an emblem of goodwill and unwavering faith. I achieved that by robbing him of his Pure Championship, by sullying those moral values he brought to the title and demonstrating the ability to lavish prestige on a championship through completely different, far less noble means. You know what else I love about the war of words Mstislav and I engaged in? Despite all of the theatrics and his convictions about earning that coveted Pure Championship back "the right way," his misguided plight fell on deaf ears and it resulted in him being nothing but a bystander to the havoc I wreaked, unable to do anything about the villain in the story getting a leg up on him and literally stealing the physical embodiment of his pride. As far as Mstislav is concerned, while he'll never confess and shed light on the facts of this situation, he's counting his blessings and thanking whatever deities he prays to that I returned his useless championship back without him having to fight me for it. I proved Aren Mstislav a fraud and a bold-faced liar, and in one final, hopeless act of contempt, he's joined together with men he'll temporarily refer to as comrades and undoubtedly dispose of shortly after solely for the purpose of exacting revenge on the evil Y2Impact! Mstislav is not confident, he's vain, and that has him convinced he's actually capable of thwarting Hexa-gun's plans and regaining his position as the apple in his little audience and fanclub's eye! Newsflash, you disingenuous scumbag -- the fans no longer believe in you, and this band of misfits you've mistakenly aligned yourself with will follow suit and abandon hope when they realize first-hand how incompetent you are, how lucky you were to defeat me on Voltage several weeks ago, how your championship isn't highly sought after because its holder is a wrestler that nobody cares about whatsoever. You'll continue playing victim, and I'll continue humoring you as the assailant.

Pizza Boy was drawn into this match at random and has no experience against competitors of our caliber. It wasn't long ago that he was delivering food, and while I'll grant that he's been impressively lucky in his short EAW tenure, that's not something you can rely on against wrestlers of our tact and wit. Aren Mstislav is a joke who had to be given his championship back because he couldn't take it on his own merits. For the life of me, I can't understand the logic in his involvement in this match. All he's proven is that he can't be trusted, that he's not dependable, and will sooner make excuses for himself than own his actions and build on his failures. You really want a wrestler like that on your team, Mr. DEDEDE? Do guys like Pizza Boy and Aren Mstislav have your spirits running high? You think you can put makeup on a pig and make it beautiful when all you've actually succeeded at is throwing shit against the wall and hoping something sticks. Don't even get me started on Brett Kennedy! It's a shame a guy like Chuck Scene, flawed and despicable but formidable, isn't scheduled for a match at Territorial Invasion while a never-was, never-will-be like Brett Kennedy is miraculously blessed with a moment in the sun and an opportunity to shine against Hexa-gun and make a name for himself by leeching off of our greatness through association alone. If Pizza Boy and Aren Mstislav are the pigs, Brett Kennedy must be the excriment ejected from their derriere. Words can't possibly express how disappointed I am that this was the best Mr. DEDEDE could do. Don't get me wrong and misunderstand what I mean by "disappointment" -- Hexa-gun will never back down from a fight regardless of whether we feel our adversaries are worthy of us or not. We attack indiscriminately and have no prejudice against people based on their background or ability. But as a competitor, as a wrestler, from Mr. DEDEDE to Y2Impact personally, I'm disappointed in you. You beat Luzmala after three grueling Spears on Showdown, proving you not only have something left in the tank, but that you're all gassed up and the life force propelling you can still be taken to new heights. I respected that, and while as much as I disliked seeing one of my fellow Hexa-gun members losing, a loss is nothing we can't shrug off still remain marching forward in spite of. But your unit isn't synchronized, no one in it aside from yourself and Ryan Savage possess any chemistry when working together, so pardon me for feeling dismayed but my competitive killer instinct simply won't accept anything else. I didn't make my way to the top of the totem by feasting on other people's scraps like everybody today is so accustomed to -- I broke down the door with no absolutely no regard for who I was facing, maintaining my poker face and never allowing my emotions to wear themselves on my expression because I refused to show weakness. That is Hexa-gun's mantra; to never show weakness, to never show fear, to put some dirt on your wounds and prove there's a reason you're in the ring. Do the men you've chosen to fight for you share in this quality, Mr. DEDEDE? Are you going to look at the wrestlers in your corner at Territorial Invasion and think, "well, they're adequate enough"? I guarantee your frustrations will be noticeable the moment one of your teammates makes a boneheaded mistake, and I know they're going to because sheesh! That's some Looney Tune personnel. In that analogy, I'm sure you'd be cocky and self-important enough to herald yourself Michael Jordan, but it's like Iverson on the Sixers when your next greatest threat is Eric fucking Snow. We're not intimidated, we're not letting our guard down because we don't think highly of the team you've assembled, and we can't be stopped no matter the lengths you go to derail our operation -- because our mission is built with a vision, and yours is blind.

[The tandem quickly get up on and walk off the set, intent and determined but visibly frustrated about some events that have transpired recently.]

As the saying goes "War... war never changes.", and truer words have never been spoken about the war to come.

No matter the situation, no matter the outcome or the precautions that are put into place to avoid such a drastic result to try and resolve a predicament, during this time there is always a war. Blood has been spilled, bones have been broken, and bonds have been shattered on this hallowed stage that we enter in the name of everything. From the company that they stand for as is the reasoning of this war, for utter control and power as was the last, and so on and so forth as the tradition has continued. War has constantly become inevitable, with the only difference being the combatants and its methods. This is the dawn of a rebellion realized, a fight to prevent the persecution of Dynasts such as myself, Lucian Black, TLA, Tyler Parker, and Carlos Rosso, we begin to reap what we have sown all on the head of Zack Crash and the loyalists who have decided to march beside him into the Gates of Hell! With a sinister structure to confine us into its dominion, the tortuous conflict that will be between our teams will be used with flesh ripped from the side of the chained walls and the thud of flesh and bone colliding with one another in an attempt to make sure that our opponent’s will isn’t realized. For Team Dynasty Wrestling, everything has been put on the line! Our company, our freedom to be able to not be forced to the iron rule of Zack Crash simply because of his deep-rooted hatred of a brand that he was cast down aside two years ago, that will be stripped away from us if there is no soul on our side that is able to pull out the impossible and defeat Team EAW! Look at the other side of the coin, what does Elite Answers Wrestling lose if they are the ones that cannot continue any longer inside War Games?

They don’t lose their company, EAW will remain standing if the fall rests on their shoulders, and all of them will keep their jobs… except for their malevolent leader that has brought this suffering down upon them: Zack Crash. That’s what this war has all been about, right? It was never about Dynasty being the place that everyone pays attention to, flips their channel onto because they know that they will get what they look for on there, but this has been about Crash’s ego being diminished with the very existence of Dynasty since that fateful night! This has never been EAW vs. Dynasty, this has been Zack Crash vs. Dynasty and he wants to bring everyone he can find down with him in this! Trust me, I know my teammates. TLA, Lucian Black and even Tyler Parker is willing to place themselves through whatever they have to in the hopes of defending and keeping Dynasty Wrestling afloat, Carlos Rosso might have ulterior motives in joining you that has not come to light, but for now he would do the same as the rest, in my regard. Will your men, Crash, go all out just to keep you in power and on EAW? Their jobs are not on the line, their company is not on the line, they are just there to defend their boss from having to relive his traumatic experience once more! Kevin Devastation… Scott Oasis… Rhaegar… Hades… are you willing to go through one of the most physically intense struggles of your collective careers inside War Games against men that have everything to lose and will make sure that at the end of the day, they keep it! Does Zack Crash remaining by your side in Elite Answers Wrestling mean that much to you? If so, you have shown the most blind loyalty towards someone that I could ever see in someone! All I know is this, by the time that bell rings, I will not see you as men who are standing for what they believe in or hired thugs that have been sent by Crash to defend him from a justice that could be no more perfect, but I will see you as five men trying to take everything away from me. My money, my career, and my life… all of that is what is at stake in that ring and if you are in that ring, you better be ready because I’m going to be swinging for the fences and fighting FOR EVERYTHING!

☤In a regal hall decked with tapestries and status is Tiberius Jones seated at a large round table with the letter “J” on it and seats pulled out displaying an ended meeting. With youthful rebellion he has his feet on the table kicking back in his chair.☤

They say a lot about my generation. We’re lazy. We’re ungrateful. We have no standards. We’ll bring about the end of days as we’ve doomed this planet.

I’d say the old geezers got it wrong. Being willing to die for your country is a total military trap by the rich who’ll find ways to opt out of fighting themselves while they make money off dying patriots. Wait until marriage? Get outta here, why you going to wait until you’ll have to give a bitch half of what you got to leave her before you know if she’s got any worth by screwing her? Of course nobody reads the newspaper when everything is on the internet. Still to the past’s credit, electricity was a pretty cool invention, we’ll keep it.

See? We keep what’s good, and disregard the passé things that really never should have been important.

Some people have given me a lot of endless flack over “betraying” Dynasty, they even had Stephen A Smith on my ass and trust me Jaywalker had his choice words for me too to add to it. Who cares about brands? Voltage, Dynasty, or Showdown, they’re nothing to fight over and you can easily switch to one roster from the next, it’s a bigger joke than sport team loyalty so I had ZERO problems pulling my decision Lebron style. People said my view on championships were twisted, I didn’t “respect” them because I tended to use the National Elite championship as a bait and bargaining tool to get all the attention on me while not caring if I necessarily acted like a “champion”: the fools don’t see that being a champion simply means you have won a championship. What I don’t get is how people can dog on me for such petty little things, while extreme was nearly snuffed out right before their eyes as they watched with no action. Extreme is one of the only things passed down to us by the legends who made this company that was of any worth to us today. People don’t like that I’m a thief, a rogue, and the handsomest devil they’ve ever seen in this little valley of hippies Crash has created, but they forget that this was a crime haven and I had come here to be an extremist because I wanted to fight in place of hard knocks where losers and winners are set apart without question each and every single match. Now what do we have? Disqualifications, no contests, count outs and whatever litany of other garbage elite rules use to throw out matches or muddy the results of a match. This is exactly like the failed war on drugs, almost everyone is getting high anyways, and you only illegalized the inevitable. Legalize marijuana and legalize chair shots, it’s time to end these ridiculous stipulations that do the people no good. Anyone who stands against us and supports Zack Crash’s Mad Max-esque backwards universe, will be made to know that the government has better chances to wipe porn of the web than they have of silencing extreme as long as we breathe. For many of us, this is a battle for what we stand for.
I can’t say the same for our opponents.

These people don’t stand for Crash or anti extreme thoughts. In fact, many of the reason they fight us are based on the reasons many diabolical dictatorships throughout history have used in their people, like Crash does, to enable their state power of evil, for lack thereof a better word. You know you’re wrong when you’re in power and you still have to use these tactics for there to be people on your side, you know you’re selfish when you try to stop a revolution not based on if you despise the revolution’s ideals, but instead because you feel it outshines you.

Look at these examples of bribery and happenstance.

Brett Kennedy is only in this match because Zack Crash made him an offer after he lost his chance to become Interwire Champion. He is a prime example of all the sellouts and kneelers on the EAW roster who will do ANYTHING as long as the power at be will rain down gifts upon them. Some may see Brett as a lone case, but I’d argue out of this entire team he MOST represents this roster that do nothing about Zack Crash and willingly help his regime despite hating everything about him. He’s the everyday guy. The boys in the back want to think of Brett as a bought man, but they fail to look in the mirror and see they by not standing up because they want to keep their paychecks are just as disgusting. You wake up and fear the idea of Crash’s security force hitting you over the back of the head with foreign objects 20 on 1, so you let him decide who he wants as world champions, which brands he wants shut down and which twisted rules are enforced in EAW. You want to get paid so bad with the big EAW paychecks, you’ll blindly ignore that the great empire of EAW was no more when he took over at the last Territorial Invasion and changed what EAW even means. The entire roster is as pathetic as Brett if they wish to open their eyes to it or not.

Pizza Boy was brought into this based on randomly being at the wrong place at the wrong time when they searched for a final man and his loyalty finalized because he feels we gave him a short cut. In my entire life, I’ve never heard a more stupid reason to go to war. I could argue that six individuals fighting an entire system backed with countless numbers and resources is a harder path and therefore it us fighting an entire roster that chose the easy way of bowing to Crash who are right, but it’s not really important what is harder or what is easier when it comes to what you stand for. Pizza Boy sounds like he’s been watching too many cartoons and superhero flicks, the world isn’t as simple as easy wrong and hard right. It’s pretty hard to go around lynching people these days, are you telling me if some crazed dude tries to lynch someone and a crowd comes to stop him you’ll be on his side and attack everyone else if they pass you a baseball bat? Or what about North Korea, what if some corrupt military official was caught by a gang of revolutionaries and you had a big weapon in your hands, are you telling me you’d save that military commander AND join Kim Jong-un to silence rebels due to that one experience of it being easier? You’re ignorant Pizza Boy, you shouldn’t be involved in this battle at all. You’re almost too stupid to put down, it almost feels wrong to put a bullet in the back of the head of someone who just has so little idea of what’s going on. Almost. See you obviously don’t care or know that EAW was founded on extreme, you obviously don’t care or know that Crash himself at the end of the last Territorial Invasion gleefully christened himself the devil while taking extreme away, so I don’t bat an eye for the loss of a wandering Pizza Boy who just walked up the door steps to hell. You knock that door Pizza Boy, JUST TRY TO DELIVER THE JUSTICE YOU THINK WE HAVE COMING LIKE THE NEW RECRUIT WHO DOESN’T KNOW HE’S IN THE WRONG NEIGHBORHOOD, just know that when knocked doors open you might not survive what answers you’re unwanted visit.

Then you’ve just got sour grapes.

Aren probably has the most legitimate reason to be upset with us out of this entire team, we stole his title for a while when he didn’t lose it and yeah even though we gave it back it doesn’t change we took it in the first place. Sure to us it was making a point against Crash’s regime in many ways and it was fun humiliating Aren, but when you’re the victim, even for a great cause, it’s understandable that you get a little upset. I just want to add an extra tidbit to keep in mind about this, if it was Zack Crash instead of us Aren not only would have gotten his title stolen, it would have been vacated and probably put on another “champion” officially, Crash has done this before to others he felt like abusing. Still, Crash hasn’t done this to Aren like he has done others, so maybe Aren doesn’t think it his problem like our actions are: what we did, which was smaller, was directly related to him. So Aren, I won’t give you a hard time about where you stand and I’ll even excuse you putting extreme on the back burner to get your revenge on us. Frankly, revenge is sort of the extreme thing to do, that’s how we use to handle business around here, if someone does wrong to you it was just common to get them back yourself instead of rallying on referees and rules. Just know, feeling sorry for what you do to others isn’t the extreme way either and I sure as hell don’t care that you’ve been and will continue to be collateral damage in our war to revive extreme. The crime haven of EAW isn’t biased towards good or evil, it simply is survival of the fittest. I’ll plunder from you anything I can get my greedy little hands on, I’ll smack you upside your head whenever I feel like it and it’d expect you to do the same if you have the guts to mess with me, that’s the way it’s meant to be. If you can’t protect that championship of yours or get it back, then you deserve to have it stolen because you’re weak.

As for the Savage Ryans, it’s obvious that the jealously and anger they possess have overridden their pride in what they stand for. Aside from Hexa-Gun, give or take a Diamond Cage or a Dark Demon, no one in EAW is as extreme as these two men. It’s not like Mr.DEDEDE, or Russell Savage especially, has any problems with random beat downs or using weapons, especially if you’re setting a message like we of Hexa-gun do. Russell will attack people before matches just because he feels like it, will attack them just for looking at him wrong and he’ll enjoy it just like we do, if not more than us. It wasn’t too long ago I’m pretty sure Russell broke some random rookies neck for no apparent reason, and they sure as hell both hate Zack Crash. So why stand against us? Oh they’ll say it’s because we hurt little Russell when he was wrestling Crash that one time, even though it took them weeks to respond and the sound in their voice was much more profound when they mentioned how sick they were about how people talked about Hexa-gun. The real reason is the bottled up anger they had of being in the shadows, they couldn’t stand that the Mercenaries glowed as tag team champions while the Savage Ryans became obscure after Pain for Pride, the fact that everyone in EAW would talk about how hardcore we were no matter how many little stunts they’d pull on nobodies, and let’s face it, Mr.DEDEDE has always been jealous that Y2Impact has more world title reigns than he does. And as I sit in this room I’m sure it hasn’t escaped Mr.DEDEDE’s notice that I’m sponsored by the J-Dynasty, a wrestling label that have never gotten along with DDD for long. In fact the things Jaspora’s Moving Mountain and Jaywalker have done to Mr.DEDEDE are things of legend, he’s been out powered and out technical wrestled by them multiple times. Admittedly, I don’t see myself out-muscling or out wrestling Mr.DEDEDE, but I do think I have more tricks up my sleeve to make up for it. I’m the man in the mist, I’m the great sniper who comes out of nowhere and can missile dropkick you in the back of your head before you know I’m there.

Let’s face it, I’m a problem child people still haven’t found a solution to and I love it. I’m the type of guy who randomly shows up at Cleopatra’s assemblies and decides to spew mist in people’s face to debut after years as a servant doing camera work for EAW, I’m the guy who kept shitting on Dynasty Wrestling while being one of their only champions to hold over EAW only to join Hexa-gun just when you thought karma will knock me out of the limelight, and when guys like Jacob Senn come looking for me at the Grand Rampage they might just end up under snakes and reptiles with me nowhere to be found.

I’m the monkey wrench in everyone else’s plan.

☤Jones winks at the camera and the scene ends.☤

[ The camera pans to a training gym with Dark Demon unloading on a punching bag –with a cutout picture of Diamond Cage’s face stuck onto it- with quick and stiff jabs into the punching bag as his agent Bryce Dean, wearing a suit and sun-glasses, is seen looking completely furious as he looks into the camera ]

Bryce Dean:

Diamond Cage ….

Diamond Cage ….

DIAMOND CAGE!

I am getting sick of this guy. Who the HELL does he even think he is? Does he not know just WHO he is dealing with at Territorial Invasion? Well, if you’ve forgotten Cage, I’ll give you a friendly reminder:

You’re dealing with ….

THE NOTORIOUS!

THE CONQUEROR OF THE EAW LEGENDS!

THE SLAYER OF THE HEART BREAK BOY!

THE MAN WHO DESTRORYED, DISMANTLED, VICTIMIZED, SLAUGTHERED, WHO GAVE EAW THE TWO GREATEST DISPLAYS OF A ONE-SIDED MISMATCH IN BACK TO BACK FREE-PER-VIEWS TO THE ‘GREATEST OF ALL TIME!’ AND DETHRONED THAT SO CALLED ‘’KING’’ OF EAW AND TOOK THAT SEAT UPON THAT THRONE WITHOUT EVEN BREAKING A SWEAT!

The SAME Heart Break Boy that you COULDN’T EVEN BEAT at Reckless Wiring! Dark Demon did it with ease, he made the Heart Break Boy look like an untrained rookie at Pain for Pride and Mid-Summer Massacre!
He ended Heart Break Boy.

He CRUSHED Cameron Ella Ava’s dreams of continuing to compete with males. He broke her spirit, he did to her what NO OTHER MALE COULD DO – not Scott Diamond, not Jaywalker- and he PUT HER DOWN and SENT HER BACK to the Vixens Division. In very own words, she was about to retire from EAW after that loss at Pain for Pride. He embarrassed her in FRONT OF THE BIGGEST CROWD IN EAW HISTORY and she hasn’t been right since, she can’t even dominate the Vixens Division like she used to be able too, he STRIPPED AWAY her mental strength.

Because that’s what happens when you face Dark Demon.

And you really think you’re going to be any different, Cage?

PLEASE!

[ Dark Demon continues to unload into the punching bag with Diamond Cages face on it as Bryce Dean takes off his sunglasses and stares into the camera ]

Dark Demon has WHOOPED your ass every week. Dark Demon has DISPLAYED his DOMINANCE, his SUPERIORITY over you ever since you returned at Mid-Summer Massacre. You think one week changes anything? You one week over THREE WEEKS of him BEATING YOU, LAYING YOU OUT, and DISMANTLING AND DESTROYING YOU is going to change anything Cage at Territorial Invasion? Dark Demon is better than you in every single aspect, he’s a better striker than you, a better grappler than you, he HITS harder than you do, he moves better than you do, he is more aware of his surroundings inside the ring than you are. There is NOTHING that you can do that will defeat Dark Demon this coming weekend. There is NOTHING that you can do that will even give Dark Demon a challenge, he WILL NOT even break a sweat finishing you.

But …you know the difference between you and Cameron Ella Ava/Heart Break Boy, Cage?

He did that first class display of dominance to him because he wanted a title, to retain his title, he didn’t want to end their careers they were just merely in his way.

But you?

There is nothing on the line for Dark Demon in this match, there is no title, no accomplishment, no achievement. He just WANTS to destroy you. He WANTS to end your career.

Imagine what he’ll do to you when all he is doing is training to end your career?

[ Bryce Dean laughs before grabbing a gym bag up from the ground and showing it to the camera, revealing the bag to be filled with money ]

This is the money that you’re going to make from this fight Cage. Dark Demon IS the money fight in EAW, he changes your life from some bum into actually having money. Dark Demon is the money fight because people PAY to see him preform, people pay to see Dark Demon end ANOTHER career. They pay to see what the Notorious One will do next. Look at the Heart Break Boy, Dark Demon changed his bum life and gave him enough money that he doesn’t need to continue fighting in EAW and embarrassing himself. But try and think of the positives Cage, at least your CHILDREN will have a better future in life than you, maybe they’ll be able to go to college, maybe they’ll be able to get a car when they are older and hey at least, Dark Demon is putting food on YOUR children’s future. Cage, you shouldn’t be angry. You should be HAPPY! You should be rejoicing for the last few days of your career, you should be out celebrating with your wife, telling her to break out the red panties –even though she’ll probably be thinking of Dark Demon the whole time- because trust me, that is the ONLY positive that you will be getting from facing Dark Demon.

You have DONE NOTHING so far Cage but to continue to prove what a colossal fuckup and a bitter disappoint that you are. You have lost matches left, right, and center. Dark Demon has laid you out and got the better of you time and time again. You SHOULD have stayed retired and stayed at home because this will not be the textbook Cinderella story return for you, there will be NO happy ending for you. The only ending that this match has is YOU laying in a puddle of your own vomit, blood and piss, being rendered unable to move, being rendered a useless vegetable for the reminder of your pathetic life from the hands of Dark Demon. You are NO competition to the Notorious One, nobody in this entire company is competition to him, he IS the greatest of all time.

The Hall of Fame is running from him.

You should too.

[ Dark Demon continues to lay into the punching bag, connecting with a spinning leg kick that rips the punching bag in half and laying it to the floor, Dark Demon grabs the picture of Diamond Cage that was stuck to the punching bag, ripping it off and ripping the picture in half and throwing it to the ground as Bryce Dean laughs ]

Dark Demon is coming.

There's always room for improvement, I've been reminded of that quite frequently lately --- when I'm in the same presence as a man, who's life long destiny was to make it on the top as a World Champion, but has still failed to do so. Isn't it obvious by now? You'd be naive to not see the full picture, with Alex Anderson standing dead center in the middle of it. It's pitiful to see a man so driven, so passionate to be among the greats, but often descends down the ladder with every opportunity granted to him. As of right now, I wouldn't put it past him to consider himself as an actual "World Champion". Yes, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt, you somehow miraculously came out victorious over three other men, to rightfully call yourself DYNASTY'S World Champion. You see the problem there? Dynasty's World Champion has little meaning to it, with all due respect to the brand and what it stands for, you're never truly a World Champion until you've legitimized yourself as an ELITE ANSWERS WRESTLING World Champion. Do you see where I'm going here? You're pridefully carrying around a title, conceivably your greatest accolade you've accomplished all year; resting next to that self-made World Championship, what was it again? The Ace World Championship? How did that turn out for you? I mean I can't really blame a man with all the desperation in the world, to give himself something to run with while his career was plummeting rapidly. But I'd love to rewind history, and take a look at every occasion that you were given the moment to become an opportunist. I'd love to go back and list the names such as, Hades The Hellaiser, Norman Hellion, and you're most formidable of rivals that you just can't seem to overcome, Tyler Parker. Those are three names over this past year or so that you've failed to dethrone, with a monstrous amount of momentum riding along with you, with each given opening you had --- the door quickly slammed back in your face. It went loss, after loss, after loss, your own manufactured "Ace World Championship" was burned in the process of it all. You were literally left with nothing, nothing to grasp a hold of to keep the engine running. I'd like to think that after that many times of facing failure head on, you would of learned something by now.

You know what I find pathetic after everything you did just to be apart of success? Your attitude, it was always the same after every downfall you confronted, it often lead to the fact that you would grasp the concept of the word "mistake". And how many times would the populace be forced to endure those same mistakes over and over? It was always your time, you were always destined to become a World Champion, but here you stand, a false idol among others, who's lowly respected, but what does that all matter to you? As long as you have some sort of entitlement to attach yourself to, your wheels will continue to spin in the same motion that they always have. I know our opinions differ when it comes to what a World Champion is, but we --- or at least myself, can come to the agreement that even if the Dynasty roster or anyone else see's what you carry around as anything prestigious to obtain, it will soon vanish from existence. What's next after that? I'm sorry for intruding on Dynasty grounds, but what comes after everything you've worked for becomes null? Will Dynasty continue to feed the likes of you more and more make pretend reigns? Then shortly after; someone like myself has to go and prove a point, because we can't have two of the same walking around with identical accolades, only one is real and the others is not. I don't speak directly to you here, I speak to anyone who's foolish enough to mistake the difference between prestige and deceit. That's why I'm here to cut the loose ends off, to do what Norman Hellion did some time to go --- to burn the image that has become the "Dynasty World Champion" and lay it to rest. I'm here to make an example out of you, Alex Anderson, not for Zack Crash, certainly not for company he runs, but for myself. I've had no strings attached to me, no collar around my neck and a leash to drag me along with it; it's always been my decision making, despite the high beliefs of what Zack Crash conceives as "control". This will not be a victory for Elite Answers Wrestling, nor for Zack Crash alike. It will be the victory of mine, for those who still have the respect for what a real World Champion represents. It's not by rebelling after your Dynasty representative failed to succeed in retaining your prized jewel, it's by manning up and actually doing something about it. Dynasty didn't need to do something so irrational for the sake of attention, you always had my attention, my respect --- I would of gladly given anyone from the Dynasty roster the opportunity, but now? Now Dynasty has Alex Anderson representing it's name in this bout, and it's only going to become a repeat of what occurred at Midsummer Massacre. You really do stand no chance, Anderson, but I commend you on your bravery to fight --- even if you had declined this match at first, you stuck it through and you went with it. I won't be dishonest with you, everything is going to go back to the way it was, while you're riding on my old nickname as "uncrowned" and my momentum will continue to grow, it's the way that it has to be, there's only option of you accepting it, or die trying to decline it.

“Best In The Fucking World”

Territorial Invasion: Civil War Promo I

Nobody knew me. That’s the crazy part in all of this.

Not a single soul in this company knew the name Jamie O’Hara when I first showed up for a simple match. Nobody cared either. Another name, another hopeful looking to achieve the same goals as each and every other competitor to sign across the dotted line. It still feels like yesterday that I found myself friendless in a sea of sharks vying for their chance to break away from a new group of fledglings; to make a statement of their own to begin their journey to their end game, their destination. Names that I could care less to remember are nothing but forgotten and here I stand, some fifteen months later as the standout, the sole survivor and wrapped by honour, by prestige, by fame, by history. I refused to look back, to rest on the past and clutch to it. What I achieved, the people I defeated were nothing but stepping stones towards greater things and it didn’t deter me that nobody thought much of me, mocked my ambitions, my desires. Fifteen months ago I put my head down, kept to myself and made sure every word I said was far from the false hope plenty of others showed. Fifteen months later, here I am standing to fight for the greatest belt there is well on my quest to leave an iron clad legacy in this business. What a journey it has been.

The term “big game player” gets tossed around these days. The kind of person who, when it truly matters and when everything is on the line, he finds a way to emerge victorious or damn close. Whether it was defending my New Breed title, challenging for a world title or fighting to win this briefcase, this very opportunity I have, I found a way to leave with my head held high KNOWING I had showed the world that everything I said had an element of truth; that it was far from the empty promises made. So why should this match be seen as any different? There’s no need to speculate, Jamie O’Hara WILL show up to Territorial Invasion with his head screwed on the right way, his shoulders prepped to carry the weight of expectation and ready to take control of his destiny, his future and that of the company. I’ve never once made claims I simply couldn’t back up. I claimed to be the future, looking back that was fairly accurate. I then claimed to be a leader of a new generation, a new guard of talent. I don’t make promises I can’t fulfill; I fight until I make sure that they’re filled and don’t settle for second. Winning the EAW Championship doesn’t achieve anything those claims. What I do as champion, how I defend it, how I represent it, that’s what creates substance to the idea of being the future.

Now, here I stand before the biggest match of my career without reaching for the brake.

Time and time again this briefcase is cashed in when the champion is down.

Time and time again it’s taken from them in the blink of an eye; the rug ripped out from under them and they’re none the wiser until they wake to find no gold rests in their hands.

How much can people actually buy into their claim as champion when they didn’t win the dam thing, they stole it?

And I’m told again and again not to fuck this up. Told to not enter this match with my head up my arse. But I’ve been here before. I’ve climbed this mountain; fought tooth and nail to get what I wanted. The man I took this briefcase - this symbol of hope to him – from, I could understand his pain when I stood tall over him. I know what it’s like put everything on the line to stand at the very top as champion. That time? I did it the same way. I told the man to his face that he had a month, 30 days to treasure that belt because I was going to take it from him. I put this pressure on my shoulders; nobody else but me because I know that I’m capable of handling it. But that’s how it’s always been here in EAW. First championship defence is against a multitude of men. First world title opportunity inside the most hellish structure there is. Cash In The Vault against some of the most talented, hungry and desperate men. Nothing has been easy. Nothing has come to me without sacrifice. Nothing I’ve achieved so far was guaranteed. Of the six to win this before, I’m the first to handle it this way; to remove the surprise, to remove the advantage, to make it an even playing field.

We all want to parade ourselves as the best in the world. We fight, we scratch, we claw our way to the top just so we can rest with such a title yet it seems like clockwork that every month someone shows up who fancies themselves as the best in the world and will sing it to the heavens…but never actually prove it. It’s lost worth, it’s lost all meaning it truly had, now it’s just another cliché of this business; it’s ruined by men like Xavier Williams. Just like the rest of the hopefuls Xavier is so over his head that he has fallen into a state of delusion, an illness that’s common in everyone who thinks they’re the best in the world. But at least this is one wrong that I can and will by righted by yours truly. Tomorrow’s Legend has always been a work in progress, a development that began the first day I stepped into this company.

But I ask, when will my time come? When will Jamie O’Hara be considered as the best in the fucking world? The answer is ongoing. My time has only just begun and there’s no indication as to when it will end. Territorial Invasion however is a considerable step in that direction.

This fight has always been a hopeless one for you Xavier. Zack Crash and Hades aren’t worthy of cleaning the blood boots that are bound to end your pitiful, false claim to both titles; neither the best in the world or the EAW Championship will be yours to hold. I’m going to strip you of everything that makes you feel like you’re deserving to reign as champion; strip you of this idea that holding that belt makes you the best in the fucking world. The pride, the ego that you’ve developed since winning the belt will be ripped away and you will have nothing felt to clutch to. But tell me how you’re the great champion, the best. You carry yourself as a superior talent and there I will stand, looking you dead in the face, eye to eye telling you to PROVE IT. Against someone with so much fire, so much desire to reign above everyone, put me out. Put my fire out and prove that you’re a superior talent because what they offered? Not even close to coming close to what I’ll bring to our little dance. Finally, a challenger more than a mediocre talent who didn’t reward himself or another, rather someone who fought to earn this. Here’s the thing, I’ve said for a long time that I didn’t need this briefcase, a date was always going to come around that Jamie O’Hara would reign as the EAW Champion but how many more unworthy challengers get their chance before it’s mine?

It didn’t take me two shots to win the New Breed title…

It didn’t take me two shots to win Cash In The Vault…

It’s taken me two shots to win this belt and I won’t make it a third…

I said when I took this briefcase that every day that I wait until I cash in won’t be wasted, rather moves on a chessboard, intricately crafted so that checkmate is the only one left to move and that you, the White King that has slept for a number of weeks unknown of my motives, will fall. It’s been called foolish, it’s been called idiotic, it’s been called a waste but my decision to handle it like this has been anything but the criticism people have had. Rest assured I don’t hold the result in any doubt, I wouldn’t simply throw this away on simply a “chance”. I find another gear, regardless of the circumstances that surround me, I always find a way. It’s the simple reason why you won’t be able to survive this match. The only person who ever could have saved this was the same person who handed you the belt in the first place; you now have no back up for when it all comes crashing down and you’re not going to have anyone to blame your failure on other than yourself. You paraded yourself around as the best in the fucking world, over your head, that the ONE thing you failed to prepare for, the one thing that Zack Crash and Hades simply did not offer was the ability to find another gear. Let me tell you how this is going to play out, it’s going to be a complete and utter destruction. A showcase of true class, finesse and caliber. And your doubt in my words? Met with a bitch slap to the face with a dose of reality. I’m the guy who will remain when “they” leave. I’m the guy who will continue to rewrite history. I’m the fucking pulse, the future, everything that’s needed to ensure the long term survivability of EAW and now, more than ever, do I need to find that next gear.

In fact, when I’m finished with you come Territorial Invasion, you’ll be begging for that rematch not because you lost your precious titles and claims to fame but rather you’ll see I would have given you the greatest fucking match of your career before putting it in a position that it will never recover from. You were a mere placeholder for a greater, more deserving champion. It’s nothing but truth Xavier, sorry to say in my eyes you and plenty of others who have fought for this and other belts in recent times are a pack of second rate wrestlers standing in as nothing more than title holders instead of champions. What you’ve held for months have been nothing more than a replica championship and it’s about time it becomes something meaningful again. It’s been documented, I’ve followed a similar career to yours but we differ here; I’m not winning this belt while you’re down and out. To win my first championship I’m going to PROVE without a doubt that this is where I belong. While you? Stolen, playing mere dress up with the title of “world champion”. Well, sadly for you Xavier play time is over and it’s time for a true champion to be crowned. Maybe once I take the belt, defeat you again, you’ll EARN your chance at the belt. I would love nothing more than putting myself up against a man as hungry to succeed as I currently am; to know the journey they have taken and know that they’re going to leave it all in the ring.

I would say this isn’t a match rather a championship coronation for yours truly but you deserve a little more respect.

Nobody more than myself has been counting down the minutes for Territorial Invasion because while you’re good…great? You are not. No longer the best in the world, no longer the EAW Champion. There’s a point to be proven and I’m the guy who is going to prove it first hand, live and in living colour in front of the world to see. My only regret is that I didn’t carry this out longer. A game that started only a few months ago will come to an end, a game that you were willing to play but a game you never stood a chance at winning. I’m done waiting, I’m going to take this belt for myself and take yet another step forward in building my legacy.

Civil War Promo #1

The camera opens on PB on the telephone. He looks concerned as he paces to and fro.

PB: Yes, bu- I know, bu-....fine. I'll see you Saturday I guess.

PB flips his cheap burner phone shut and stares off, holding his forehead in distress, before taking notice of the camera on him.

PB: You know, it's strange how I keep getting drug into other people's problems. Maybe it's the painful reality of being a neutral bystander during a civil war, maybe it's paying out a debt to someone else, a debt you didn't know about, a debt they think you owe. If that's the case, fine, great, not like I have a choice, but I gladly stand beside the Savage Ryans in battle, but I cannot pretend that there aren't members of my team that are sort of a conflict of interests when it comes to my goals here in EAW. Aren, we have history, and hopefully we have a future as well, but I'd like to believe that some of the random choosing that went into me being accosted and put on this team had something to do with respect. Maybe it did, maybe it's something more sinister, but either way you still have my undivided attention.

PB nods his head thoughtfully, as if being approached with a question from an unseen party.

PB: And maybe you question my motives in taking out Hexa-Gun. I've made myself a marked man for a cause that, prior to Showdown, wasn't mine to fight for. And why? There's no question that I respect HBG and Y2Impact. The Mercenaries are very decorated here in EAW, and there's no question as to whether that freak show Burned Man freaks me right the hell out. So why pick a fight when given the opportunity to stand against everything that's oppressed me here in EAW? Men who abducted me into their team, and a particular man who consciously stands in my way to the the Pure Title? Was it that I owe Savage Ryan something? No. I am in debt to them, but no. EAW, despite it's corruption and glass ceilings is filled with respectable men and women who believe in fighting for what they want instead of throwing some petty strike or becoming thugs worse than those who hold you down. That's not me. I'm no gun for hire making chump change with political assassinations. Pulling a trigger is easy work, especially when you have a chamber of bullets to back up that first cheap blow, just in case it doesn't do the job, just in case the shot isn't as good as those taking it would believe it to be.

PB picks up a chair folded and leaning against the wall. He holds it in front of him, almost like a shield, revealing it's four distinct dents, before unfolding it, and sitting down directly in front of the camera.

PB: When you handed me this chair and held a man in position for execution, Hexa-Gun, you made the decision easy for me. I'm not Mr. Easy Way Out, I'm not a short cut taker. I break my back to make my living, and I do so with pride in knowing that what I do, win, lose, or draw, results in an honest day's work. I don't mind taking the heat for it in our match, either. I'm horrified, but unlike you gents and lady, I understand that there is no easy street, and that cheap actions have expensive consequences. I fully expect crucifixion, public execution, the same kind you tried to dirty my hands with at Showdown, and that's fine. Just don't expect me to not take at least one of you with me when I'm martyred to oblivion. I guess the only question that remains is; who will it be? Which tin soldier following orders will go down at the shameful hands of a coward kidnapped into conflict? Whose going to hell with the hapless half-shift hero? Whose going to fall when the Pizza Boy stands and delivers in 30 minutes or less? I'd like to think it'll be more than one of you, but I'm realistic in my endeavors. I know I'm not so big, I know I'm not so great, and I get that I'm not so intimidating, but if it takes fighting with one arm, if it takes hopping on one functional leg, if it takes losing all function of my motor skills and gnawing away at your ankles, I promise you this, Hexa-Gun, I'll do what you tried to do to me at Showdown. I'll bring you down to my level, and I'll destroy whatever passes for humanity that is left in you. Maybe it'll be Y2Impact, maybe it'll be Luzmala, maybe it'll be The Burned Man, hey maybe I'll choose extra crispy. The facts remain that I will end one of you for my team, for EAW, for every single person who has to deal with pricks like you on a daily basis!....

PB's eyes well up as he averts his gaze from the camera momentarily, before looking down at his feet in a flash of regret, and then looking directly into the lens once more with sincerity in his expression.

PB: ...and that I'm probably not going to walk away from this one.

PB shakes off the sentiment and puts on a tough face, swallowing back his tears and anguish.

PB: And that's fine. I've found something in life worth giving life for, and few men can say that about their professions.

Psst...hey...the card...the card!

The Pizza Boy meets eyes with someone off camera. His face sours a little in losing the sentimental moment to the intruding voice.

PB: What!? Fine! Fine! I'll read the card...ahem..."I just want to let all of my fans know that I'm in a disclosed location for the time being, and am in no way being held against my will. I"....really? I mean, isn't this the kind of thing that people being held against their will say?...Fine!..."I want to be in this match. I humbly thank my kidnappers"-oh what is this drivel? Really?! Nobody's going to believe this! And I just said I'm fine with the match-okay, fine, whatever. Just...just chill. "I want to wrestle with Savage Ryan, Brett Kennedy, and Aren...however you spell his last name." Just call him and ask!....I know it's embarrassing, but, okay, I'm reading the freakin' cards! "And Savage Ryan is the sexiest tag team on the-" Oh give me a break!

PB hops out of his chair and advances toward the giggling masses behind the camera just as it fades to black.

We all know that those two words won't redefine anything.

This feud between the lot of us has been going back and forth for about a year now Starr. With that said, do you really expect a quarter of words to conclude the constant hatred that has existed between us for the longest? I have no doubt that the two words will end the match but it won't remove you from my sight, you'll find another rationalization for your lack of performance and find yourself on the card for the next substantial event finding for my world title.. again. It's a constant routine that cannot be broken unless you by some chance strike gold and actually get one over on me and we all know that isn't happening. When I lusted to become world champion for the longest, I never knew that the work consisted of so much fatigue. I will have become a world champ of three months in a mere week and I have yet to find a solidifying competitor who can legitimately fight me for my title; give me any sort of challenge. I know people like Liam Catterson and Starr Stan like to believe that they can pose a threat to my world championship but it doesn't take a genius to configure up all the facts by numbers and charts to figure out that I have so efficiently dominated this division without being taken to my limit or edge even once. And with that said, I can haughtily admit without any hesitation whatsoever that I will be walking out the victor against Starr Stan at Territorial Invasion at this weekends end. The event, the competitor and the title certainly do give me nostalgia though and a chance to exact revenge for the one night that has been propagandized as the catalyst to the downfall for the following years. As the better lot of you may already know by now, I was chosen as the surprise competitor to face my former mentor Starr Stan for the world title at Territorial Invasion four years ago and ultimately lacked in my effort to pull out a victory. We all know of this story because we have only heard it repeated by the publishers, by my rivals a few hundred times and I will finally be given a chance after all these years to re-write my story because at this Territorial Invasion, the propulsion has swayed and anyone who does not simply see me as the favorite in this weekends match is a hopeless devotee who cannot bare to me see at the top reigning like a king.

You have incessantly mocked me for the past few weeks Starr and it would be warranted if we stood anywhere on the timeline other than the present time but the matter of fact is that we are in the present time. What happened in the past is just a memory of what once was, what remains in the present is the real proof. The thing is that in the present, you have no merit for yourself. If there is anyone who can be mocked in the present time among the lot of us, it is you. I am not talking about the four time world champion and the Hall of Famer but rather the person who tore his meniscus just a week before his world title match and had to actually find a replacement. You know what I did whilst you were in the hospital reminiscing about the good old days? I proved myself once again and showed everyone that not only am I capturing overwhelming defeats over the likes of Brian Daniels and Starr Stan but also other powerhouses on the roster when I took down Liam Catterson in a matter of a few mere minutes, it wasn't competition at all.. it was sparring practice at best. Nobody is born perfect but they acquire characteristics over their lifetime which lead them to a impeccable figure and if there is any man, one man who has come close to achieving that impeccable figure, it is me. You do not achieve immortality by simply being prodigious at everything; you pay your dues and you offer your sacrifices. Every single mutilating moment I spend on my back taking in slanders from right and left were for more vast purpose and because I was able to endure through that pandemonium is why I am so self-assured in my ability to succeed. Any man who has not endured pain has never tried anything. You had four chances at becoming the limelight of this company but you never once had the audacity.. never the guts to go for it but I, the impeccable figure am on a pursuit to become the person that becomes synonymous to this companies name in the matter of a few months. Naturally, the match set that awaits me would pressure the tremendous lot because there is no doubt in my mind that the elitists in this company tend to have tons of resolve but the pain I am going to be excruciating to Starr Stan is a pain never felt before.. something that will make his meniscus pain some minuscule and have him spewing the words only a few moments into the match. This match is honestly no different to me than any other match that I have been put in against you Starr Stan so you think you've put yourself in a position in which you hold an upper hand over me? I will crush that delusion and once again bring you back to the present where I am the current Answers World Champion and nothing you say now or do at the weekends end will change that matter of fact.

You've got it wrong. That match at Territorial Invasion four years ago wasn't my biggest match, it was the match where I redeemed victory over you and Brian Daniels at Pain for Pride for the Answers World Championship. I don't choose to let that match from years ago decide my career anymore. I would like to rather use the match that divulged the commemoration of the new king in Extreme Answers Wrestling, it's my realm now.. so I'll say it once again Starr Stan, nothing you can do now to change that.

EAW UNCOVERED

[Cloud is sitting on chair in an empty ring with Stan Lawson, EAW interviewer]

Stan: Welcome back to EAW Uncovered, this is Stan Lawson. I am sitting here with breakout star of the month, Cloud Matsuda.

Cloud: [smiles] Hello Stan.

Stan: It appears for the past couple of weeks, you are the talk of the Vixens division, save for The Empress of Elite Tournament.

Cloud: [nods] You could say that. I wanted to prove myself to the EAW universe, and I did for my first match. Second one was a little wonky, but I’ve been given quite the praise backstage.

Stan: Well, you and Katie Rotten put on quite a show. Lumen made a statement before the match that she would take you on one-on-one. Do you feel you can beat her?

Cloud: As with any competitors that cross skies with me, I’m eager to see what they have in store. I am not a woman easily intimidated Stan. But, I’m no fool either. It wouldn’t be an easy match, but I know in my heart I would come out the victor, instead of blinded by blonde ambition.

Stan: Speaking of competition, there is word around the office of some plans you have in store?

Cloud: [pauses for a moment, lightly blushing] Well…nothing is set in stone, but I kind of do.

Stan: Elaborate.

Cloud: I’ve requested a match against the winner of the EoE tournament. This is not a guarantee; after all I have yet to climb the ladder. But, being a late entry in the division, I’m sure the EAW univer- no the wrestling world as a whole is curious to see how I stack up against the best of my feminine brethren.

Stan: [shocked] Wow. If you were to win that match, it would certainly raise your stock within the company.

Cloud: Well if I want to show the world Stan, I can’t do it from my couch in San Diego. [gets up] Or Tokyo. [walks out the ring]

Stan: [stares] Uh…we will be right back after these messages.

[End of Interview]

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EAW Promoz! (Part 5 - Locked for posting...)

EAW Promoz! (Part 5 - Locked for posting...) :: Comments

六 Drake Jaeger is shown dressed in his full ring gear, trench coat, sunglasses, gloves, and a toothpick in his mouth as he frustratingly paces back and forth in front of a large banner with the Hexa-gun logo on it at an unknown location. 六

EAW Promoz! (Part 5 - Locked for posting...)

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