Lars is arrogantly celebrating the title victory like a buffoon and accidentally slips over, falling backwards onto the wooden table Finnegan was enjoying his tea at. He shrugs and puts the empty cu on Lars chest. A referee counts the free.

New Champion: Cup

The Tea gets smashed by an american coffee mug

New Champ via "KO": Coffee Mug

Turns out the american coffee mug was actually made in China (now at your local WalMart!) and it broke in a couple of days.

Title has been vacated due to sudden death of American Coffee Mug.

Donald Trump declares himself the new champion on behalf of America.

Cara Delevingne seduces Donald Trump, and starts giving him a handjob. Trump taps his hand against the wall, thus losing the title via submission to Cara, who is now a 4 time champ!

Adieu de France on Cara.

New Champion.

Keelan hits a Murder Crusher on Anthony and scores the pin.

Hardcore Heavymetalweight Championship History:

Azumi Goto - 1
Keelan Cetinich - 1 (won via rollup after offering Azumi a hug)
The Pizza Boy - 1 (won via forefit as Keelan thoughtlessly signed a receipt after ordering a pizza)
Chris Elite - 1 (won via forefit as Pizza Boy signed a document to hand the title over)
Chris' Stove - 1 (won via submission as Chris Elite tapped out after burning his hand on the stove)
Keelan Cetinich - 2 (won via pinfall after pinning the stove)
Big Mike - 1 (won via knockout after hitting Keelan across the face with a pan)
Azumi Goto - 2 (won via forefit after trading a Sony Music record deal to Big Mike for the title)
Iron Chef Morimito - 1 (won via pinfall after pinning a sleeping Azumi in a stove)
Cara Delevingne - 1 (won via pinfall after pinning Morimoto at a Victoria Secret Fashion Show)
Zack Crash - 1 (won via pinfall after rolling up Cara)
Lemmy Killmeister - 1 (won via pinfall after Pizza Boy pinned Crash, but dedicated his victory to Lemmy)
Senor Gonzalez - 1 (won via pinfall after hitting Pizza Boy with a shovel)
Keelan Cetinich/Cara Delevingne - 3/2 (won via pinfall after hitting Senor with a shovel and both pinning)
Nobi - 1 (won via pinfall after hitting a double lariat and pinning both Cara and Keelan)
Bicycle - 1 (won via pinfall as the bicycle landed on top of Nobi)
Harambe - 1 (won via pinfall after taming the bicycle)
Keelan Cetinich - 4 (won via death after Keelan killed Harambe with a shotgun)
Cara Delevingne - 3 (won via pinfall after hitting Keelan with a chair)
Doink the Clown - 1 (won via pinfall after rolling up Cara)
Big Makayla - 1 (won via pinfall after pinning Nobi)
DDD's Chin - 1 (won via pinfall after pinning Makayla)
Kelly Hackenschmidt - 1 (won via submission after forcing DDD's chin to somehow tap out)
Pizza Pie - 1 (won via submission after forcing Kelly to tap out after the pizza pie was stuck to his face)
Petra Chan - 1 (won via forefit after the dog ate the cheese off the pizza)
Nasir Capitani - 1 (won via pinfall after sending Petra to the kennel and pinning the cage)
Azumi Goto - 3 (won via pinfall after rolling up Nas)
Tony Rolland - 1 (won via pinfall after kidnapping Azumi and pinning her in a van)
EAW Hardcore Heavymetalweight Championship - 1 (won via pinfall after laying on Tony while he slept)
Tony Rolland - 2 (won via pinfall after rolling over in his sleep and pinning the title)
Kelly Hackenschmidt - 2 (won via forefit after trading the belt for a bag of weed)
Bird Shit - 1 (won via pinfall after Kelly tripped over and a bird shat on his chest)
Kelly's Towel - 1 (won via forefit after Kelly cleaned the shit off his chest with a towel)
Keelan Cetinich - 5 (won in a ladder match after climbing a ladder and retrieving the title and the towel after Kelly went to take a shower)
Ladder - 1 (won after Keelan slips off the ladder and falls to the ground. The ladder falls on Keelan and pins)
The title becomes vacated after the ladder snaps in half. 
Filthy Frank - 1 (picks up title)
Cailin Dillon - 1 (won via knockout after throwing Frank off a bridge)
The Vixens Championship - 1 (won via pinfall after Cailin falls asleep with the title around her waist)
Cailin Stalker - 1 (won via pinfall after pinning Cailin while she slept)
Security Guard - 1 (won via forefit after the stalker gave up the title for his freedom)
Alberto the Chihuahua - 1 (won via pinfall after guard slips and falls and the dog jumps on him)
Petra Chan - 2 (won via forefit as Petra got into a fight with Alberto and Alberto fled)
Azumi Goto - 4 (won via submission after Petra taps her paw on Azumi making her the champ)
El Landerson - 1 (won via pinfall after rolling up Azumi)
Niki Khan - 1 (won via pinfall after rolling up Landerson)
Keelan Cetinich - 6 (won in a first blood match after giving Niki Khan a papercut)
Mak - 1 (won via forefit after penetrating Keelan with his dick)
The title becomes vacated after Mak is arrested for sexual assault.
El Landerson - 2 (won via finding the title)
Donald Trump - 1 (won via enforcing a new law. Everytime Landerson wins the title, Trump becomes champion)
Pizza Delivery Car - 1 (won via pinfall after Donald Trump gets stuck under the car and the ref counted the fall)
Pizza Boy - 2 (won via forefit after the delivery car breaks down)
Terry Chambers - 1 (won via pinfall after poking Pizza Boy)
Terry's Son - 1 (won via pinfall after lying on Terry)
Stevie Wonder - 1 (won via submission after high fiving Terry's son, which somehow was a tap out victory)
Terry Chambers - 2 (won via pinfall after squashing Stevie)
Pizza Boy - 3 (won via forfeit after Terry Chambers traded the title for a Meatlovers Pizza)
Terry Chambers - 3 (won via ... i don't even know. he took the title back because there was a slice missing in his pizza smh)
Cleopatra - 1 (won in a Last Man Standing match after flashing Terry her tits and Terry fainting, and not answering the 10 count)
HBB - 1 (won via pinfall after making Cleopatra fall asleep by reading the bible to her)
Keelan Cetinich - 7 (won in a tables match after back body dropping HBB through a table)
Brody Sparks - 1 (won via submission after Brody started sucking Keelan's finger and told him all the horrible things she was going to do to him later)
EAW Hardcore Heavymetalweight Championship - 2 (won via submission after Brody tapped out while masturbating)
DDD's Sex Doll - 1 (won via pinfall after falling on the title)
Matt Miles - 1 (won via submission after putting a nail into the doll and pinned it against the wall)
Finnegan Wakefield - 1 (won it in a Yu-Gi-Oh! game after summoning Exodia)
Lars Grier - 1 (won via pinfall after rolling up Finnegan while he drank tea)
Cup - 1 (won via pinfall after Lars slipped over and the cup landed on his chest)
Coffee Mug - 1 (won via knockout after the coffee mug smashed the cup)
The title becomes vacated after the Coffee Mug smashes itself because it was bought at a Walmart.
Donald Trump - 2 (declared himself the new champion)
Cara Delevingne - 4 (won via submission by giving Donald Trump a handjob)
Anthony Leonheart - 1 (won via pinfall after hitting Adieu de France on Cara)
Keelan Cetinich - 8 (won via pinfall after hitting a Murder Crusher on Anthony)

Grier cashes in his secret MITB he won in a secret MITB ladder match held backstage, and he's going to cash it in on Keelan......
WAIT! GRIER PULLS OFF HIS FACE......IT'S VINCE RUSSO!

Russo laughs at Keelan. He then shows David Arquette as world champ. Keelan faints over seeing the horrid thing. Russo pins him and becomes the world champ!

Submitted Russo with the Naopleon's Hook.

Swerve! it wasn't Russo, it was Russo's twin, Twosso.

Russo retains by through technicality.

Adieu de France on Russo/Twosso !

Real Vince Russo comes out and low blows anthony! Another one! Another one! Another one! Another one!

Leonhart's balls stop working and he is sent back to france.

Russo wins the title again!

Vince Russo attends Comic-Con. A batman cosplayer rolls up Russo for the victory.

SWERVE ! Russo was the cosplayer all along.

Russo is champion.

Russo dies.

Russo comes back to life! SWERVE!

Russo is champion again and kicks his old body away.

Anthony is accompanied by Adriana Lima who seduces Russo and then Leonhart hits a neckbreaker and then Adriana Lima scores the pinfall.

Russo books a rematch. The stipulation? A Russos Revenge Match!

The rules are simple: Russo wins lol

Russo is champion !!!!!!!1one

After being pinned, Russo kicks out. He walks up to Leonhart and says "Nobody loses to neckbreakers, bro"

He then hits a neckbreaker on Leonhart and wins again!

Title is now vacated because y'all motherfuckers gotta get off Russo's dick now ya hear?

Russo awards the title to his twin brother Twosso

SWERVE!

Twosso was Russo all along.

Russo is Champion!

ADIEU DE FRANCE !
Anthony Leonhart is champion.

SWERVE! Twosso is not russo, and russo is not russo, it was lars Grier all along!

Lars is now champion.

The Gods of Wrestling implement a new commandment - Vince Russo and Vince Twosso are no longer allowed to compete for this championship, starting now. His title reign history will be forever in the record books, but all future title reigns will not be counted.

> sidenote: Russo was Keelan all along. Keelans title reigns are now Russo's. Russo has the record bay bay!