The Great Adventures of Hurricane Hawk and Diamond Cage

(“Bad and Boujee” By Migos play as Hurricane Hawk walks the streets of Dublin, Ireland in slow motion with his hair blowing in the wind and shades on his face)

(The music abruptly stops as Hawk looks at his watch)

Hawk: Where the fuck is Diamond Cage? We got business to take care of?

(Hawk pulls out his cellphone dialing before holding it to his ear)

Hawk: Yeah where the fuck are you? You said meet me here at a certain time, are you running on Canada time? Let’s find this motherfucker and bury him! I don’t care about you chasing Cameron Ella Ava, You get your ass here now! And stay away from my baby momma fuckboy!

(Hawk hangs up before taking off his leather jacket to reveal a “Have You Seen Stephen Fox” T Shirt with Stephen Fox sitting at a computer desk with a bottle of hennessy and a dozen pictures of Cameron Ella Ava on his computer)

(Hawk starts to smirk as he starts to walk to random people in Ireland asking them where Stephen Fox is and then finds himself going into a bar in the downtown area of Dublin, Ireland)

Hawk(Looking at his watch): Still not here.. This motherfucker man..

(Hawk pulls out his phone and starts to call Diamond Cage but then looks up to see a “flabbynsick” Stephen Fox sitting at the bar with an old picture of Cameron Ella Ava with Hawk holding the EAW World Heavyweight Championship)

Hawk(Whispering): I found his bitch ass.. Meet me at this bar ASAP!!!

(“Immigrant Song” By Led Zeppelin begins to play as Diamond Cage is shown walking slowly, leather jacket on and shades on his face as he as a smirk on his face)

(Diamond Cage opens his phone before looking around the town of Dublin)

Cage: You know, this is a depressing shitty ass country.

(Diamond Cage continues walking as he sees Hurricane Hawk standing outside the bar)

Diamond Cage: Are you sure he’s in there?

Hawk(showing him a picture on his phone): How many other motherfuckers do you know look this fat and out of shape with a bottle of Jack Daniels and a picture from 2011 of Cameron Ella Ava?

Diamond Cage: Good point, How do you wanna rekt’d this motherfucker?

Hurricane Hawk: IMA STAB EM IN THE EYE, IMA KICK EM IN THE LEG, IMA BREAK THAT MOTHERFUCKERS NECK, LET’S JUST GO IN THERE AND FUCK HIM UP!!

Diamond Cage: By all means, I have a plan, let’s call Cameron on the phone and put her on speaker!

Hurricane Hawk(smirking): Let’s fucking do this.

( Hurricane Hawk goes through his contact list as he clicks the name “Supposed To Be Baby Momma” with a broken heart emoji as he clicks the call button. Diamond Cage and Hurricane Hawk step into the bar as Cameron answers the phone )

Cameron Ella Ava*On speaker*: Look motherfucker.. I told you not to call me anymore.

Hurricane Hawk(looking at Cage blushing): Stoooopppp playingggggg. Anyways look.. I found this fatass motherfucker that you left me for.. And I’m going to end his whole life.

Diamond Cage: Cam, I need you to say Dark Demon out loud in 2 seconds when we get near him. He’s looking at this 2011 picture of you.. Quite sexy.

( Hawk looks at Diamond Cage with a death stare as Diamond Cage laughs in his face )

Cameron Ella Ava: Why the fuck should I do anything for you Hawk.. you left me high and dry on that stage and I thought you were going to marry me.

Hurricane Hawk: Listen, not the time to argue, plus you still got that ring when I was supposed to take it back to Tiffany’s, I’m out here struggling for money girl.

Diamond Cage: Just say his fucking name.

Cameron Ella Ava(on speaker Sighing(: DARK.. DEMON.

Hawk: gotta go babe!

(Hawk hangs up his phone)

( Stephen Fox suddenly freezes as he hears his name being called by the female of his dreams and he turns around to see Hurricane Hawk and Diamond Cage behind him as he weirdly grins before trying to burst off in a run but Hawk and Cage grab him quickly )

Hurricane Hawk: EVERYONE GET THE FUCK OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fan: OH man it’s those EAW wrasslers, hey Hawk didn’t you die like 2 years ago?

(Hawk punches the fan in the face knocking him out cold)

Hurricane Hawk: ANYBODY ELSE WANT TO FUCK WITH ME?

Another Fan: Didn’t you lose Cameron Ella Av-

Hawk: whats your name kid?

Fan: Stan

(Hawk superkicks Stan)

Hawk: I JUST KICKED STAN!!!! DOES ANYBODY ELSE WANT TO TASTE THIS BOOT?!?!?

Diamond Cage: Hawk.. chill the fuck outl, we not tryna catch any cases

Stephen: let me go muthafuckas i got a voltage script to turn in late

(Hawk roughing up Stephen)

Hawk: THIS IS FOR TAKING MY FUCKING BABY MOTHER!!!

*(Hawk goes to swing until Diamond Cage smashes a beer bottle over Stephen’s
head and begins teeing off with punches)

Diamond Cage: THIS… ISS… FOR… TAKING… TARAH.. NOVA.. AWAY… FROM.. MEE… YOU … STUPID… SON… OF A …. BITCH!!!

Hawk: CAGE.. LET ME DO THIS REAL QUICK GRAB THAT BOTTLE FOR ME AND SIT IT DOWN THERE…

( Diamond Cage grabs a liquor bottle and sits it on the ground as Hawk has Stephen Fox on his knees before hitting him with a vicious curb stomp breaking the liquor bottle with Stephen’s face )

Hawk: FUCK … YOU… YOU … FUCKED… ME… OVER… AT .. RTR….. AND… TOOK… MY… GIRL… YOU … IRISH LEPRECHAUN BASTARD.

Cage: SPEAKING OF LEPRECAUNS,, LOOOK, HIS ARMY OF MIDGET ASSHOLES ARE COMING FOR US WITH RAILROAD SPIKES, RUN !!!!!

(Hawk begins superkicking midget after midget as Diamond Cage hides over the counter)

Hawk: THIS IS FOR CAM… THIS IS FOR RTR 2012….. THIS IS FOR HAWKNATION!!!!
(Hawk superkicks the last midget before looking around for Cage)

Hawk: GET YOUR SCARY ASS UP LET’S GO!!!

Cage: SORRY MAN I JUST REALLY HATE MIDGETS HAVE YOU SEEN MY DAUGHTER ARIA? SHES A DWARF!!!?!!?!?!?!

(Hawk and Cage flee the scene as cops arrive and Stephen Fox is left laying in a pool of his own blood as the scene fades to black before a “FUCK STEPHEN FOX” graphic appears)

PART TWO COMING SOON… (LMAO)

» Part 2: ADVENTURES OF DIAMOND CAGE AND HURRICANE HAWK
» Hurricane Hawk
» Hurricane Hawk.
» Hurricane le Hawk?
» POLL: Diamond Cage vs. ???? - EAW Championship

The Great Adventures of Hurricane Hawk and Diamond Cage

The Great Adventures of Hurricane Hawk and Diamond Cage

Similar topics

Similar topics